May be the funniest story I have read....

The Ballad Of The Unknown Skier.







Wilhelm Farnswather was probably the most special unknown skier to ever burn down a ski school and install a magic carpet on his countertop. The magic carpet made for difficult dining, but it was one of his claims to fame (along with his rear-entry long underwear). He was the first skier to attempt a switch lawndart and every time we visit his grave I remember the time we made him a fake grave and then I get pissed, because I realize he's not dead and he still owes me money. We used to ski all over 'the place'. 'The place' as many know is Salt Lake City. A man with more chicks than any of us could ever score said so over 1000 years ago on his way to building the largest gravy boat to sail the seven oceans with two of every fish on board. The fish were there to have sex. (I need to find me one of those boat rides).


Wilhelm Farnswather later got his picture taken while skiing and he spent weeks looking for it. It was a drawing of a unicorn having a tea party with a leprechaun. On the back of the picture was a secondary drawing of the unicorn impaling the leprechaun on his horn and then the unicorn rolled around naked in the leprechaun's blood soaked gold. It was a really cool picture that taught us both a lot about the unicorn's evil nature; it was also the single event that inspired us to buy an abandoned missile silo in Montana and stockpile weapons. To train for the 'final reckoning' we'd cut one horn off a goat and send it running through our minefield. While watching that goat's body bounce from mine to mine, I wrapped my skins around my head and almost died. Luckily Wilhelm was there to point and laugh.





*the Jeans are coming*

*the Jeans are coming*

i stopped reading once i got to magic carpet

*the Jeans are coming*

I stoped reading pretty early on also. kinda boring.










Eggs and bacon please, eggs over skeezy

say no to drugs.
...............................................................................................

-steve [always clownin, never frownin. s.1986]

[i treat each day like its game seven in overtime.
born to shine at home and over border lines.]

man,that guy was on something.I had fun,so should YOU.YES,YOU
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I changed my sig because someone thought it was too long,so that makes it a shorter sig,doesn't it?Maybe i should make it longer,maybe not,but who gives a fuck?Certainly not me,neither your mom,I like trees,because they grow apples,and I like apples as much as i like weed.
My conclusion is that we should all put some seeds under the ground in some hot country(like mine,where the heat is too hot to move 3 feet away from the swimming pool)and just let it grow,because when i get old i wanna get stoned,but in order to get high i need to improvise some techniques for the growth of pot.

That was awful
********

I Like To Ski

HAHAHA! read the whole thing, you wont be disappointed. HAHAHA


Why don't you take a long walk on a short peir.

lmao
'my 'Who's next to die thread' was unfairly deleted, so was my thread about sarah oates, so was my thread about hot cousins, so was my thread about beastiality, so were all my harvette threads, there's more and those are just threads, actuall posts are a whole other story, like when I poste jarossmb's phone number and address and told everyone to call his dad and tell him his son was a bitch. O well. '
-Phrosty