Member of the Month

hi_vis360
November, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Your most embarrassing skiing moment?

profile picture
steezemunkey
Posts: 99 - Karma: 16
I was on a school ski trip to Italy. The water they served us with dinner had been contaminated by flies, since it had been left open and uncovered for a whole day. Needless to say, a number of people came down with various illnesses, including myself. However, I soldiered on, and continued to ski, feeling unwell.
It was on one of the the lifts however that I suddenly felt a worrying tinge in my colon. To cut a long story short, I couldn't hold it any longer, and resultantly, the projectile shit ran down my leg, and into my boot. So, I had to throw my snowpants and Intuition liners away, as no amount of washing could salvage them.


Your turn.
Oct 10 2009 6:04PM
0 0
profile picture
kepler.
Posts: 8761 - Karma: 139
You win.
Oct 10 2009 6:07PM
0 0
profile picture
tinkytwinky
Posts: 2451 - Karma: 1,571

yesterday at the airport there was this guy who looked like my dad so i said

'hey, how bad is my pit stench/puddles?"

wow.....

Oct 10 2009 6:08PM
0 0
profile picture
OhioRiderSPK5
Posts: 968 - Karma: 24
it would prob be best for u to never come on this site again after that
Oct 10 2009 6:08PM
0 0
profile picture
Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
 
Oct 10 2009 6:08PM
0 0
profile picture
Morgen.
Posts: 1199 - Karma: 61
wow i was gona say falling down in the lift line. but im pretty sure shitting your pants on a chair lift wins.
Oct 10 2009 6:09PM
0 0
profile picture
grifftang
Posts: 1277 - Karma: 14
i dont think anyone should contribute to this thread unless it is to say "You win." to the OP.
Oct 10 2009 6:12PM
0 0
profile picture
factory81
Posts: 3967 - Karma: 63
Yeah really, shitting your pants really ups the ante on this competition.

I was going to say like you know...learning to ski switch on some downhill racing skis. But fuck man, you win.
Oct 10 2009 6:15PM
0 0
profile picture
8ONE657
Posts: 3045 - Karma: 209
i had a pretty embarrassing one last winter and it's on film but i don't think it even compares to shitting my pants on the chair...ewww
Oct 10 2009 6:19PM
0 0
profile picture
steezemunkey
Posts: 99 - Karma: 16
Normally, my sphincter control is top notch. But on this occasion, there was nothing I could do. I had that horrible feeling of knowing what was about to happen, followed by that horrible feeling of shit in your ski boot.
Oct 10 2009 6:33PM
0 0
profile picture
Morgen.
Posts: 1199 - Karma: 61
i dont think any of us know what shit feels like in our ski boot hahahahaha
Oct 10 2009 6:35PM
0 0
profile picture
8ONE657
Posts: 3045 - Karma: 209
can't say i know the feeling.
Oct 10 2009 6:35PM
0 0
profile picture
PAuL_Hellar
Posts: 1355 - Karma: 62
thats fucking hilarious
Oct 10 2009 6:38PM
0 0
profile picture
*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15082 - Karma: 9,170
sooo funny
Oct 10 2009 6:40PM
0 0
profile picture
JRullo
Posts: 1794 - Karma: 265
i was claiming i could rodeo off a cliff for an entire day then when i tried it i landed on my face and got a huge bloody nose
Oct 10 2009 6:48PM
0 0
profile picture
remove
Posts: 2566 - Karma: 1,026
Not as good as the shit one but once i had to ride up a 3 person chair with two HUGE girls (they must have been around 250-300lbs) so i'm on the end crammed and just trying to focus on my music rather than the obnoxiously loud conversation brewing beside me. I noticed something on my boot so i bent a little bit over to scrape it off when i heard fat ass let out this blood curling scream right in my ear. This startled me to say the least and i fell out of the chairlift down about 20ft and broke my arm befor i left though i found those two on the bunny slope and sprayed the shit out of them (i'd spray them let them think they were getting away then bomb it and do it again)
Oct 10 2009 6:53PM
0 0
profile picture
rj.
Posts: 3323 - Karma: 28
lolwut
Oct 10 2009 6:55PM
0 0
profile picture
Phil.T
Posts: 241 - Karma: 62
i wonna see this vid
Oct 10 2009 6:57PM
0 0
profile picture
Black-Bandanna
Posts: 6680 - Karma: 1,603
So did the other people on the lift with you know that you explosive diarrhea'd in your pants? Further more, what did you do when you reached the top? Take off your shitty pants and cast them into the woods? Haha I would've probably just jumped from the lift head first to end my shame.
Oct 10 2009 6:58PM
0 0
profile picture
carbon.pulse
Posts: 3348 - Karma: 22
Skiing switch down a trail not watching where i was going. Ended up hitting a stop sign going 30ish km/h. Felt like a total nob. Then had a jamaican liftie yell at me for going backwards.
Oct 10 2009 6:59PM
0 0
profile picture
bootleg_BEN
Posts: 2499 - Karma: 44
How was skiing down with that sloshing around in your pants and boots?
Oct 10 2009 7:00PM
0 0
profile picture
steezemunkey
Posts: 99 - Karma: 16
I was only on the chair with some old woman, who was sitting at the opposite end, so she didn't really notice. I skied back to the hotel we were staying at as quickly as possible, and rushed to the bathrooms in the hotel lobby. And, as they say, the rest is history.
Oct 10 2009 7:01PM
0 0
profile picture
_CC_
Posts: 3890 - Karma: 747
breaking my face with my own knee or handing my friend a pile of tampons at the lodge instead of his wallet doesnt even compare to shitting on the lift. you win
Oct 10 2009 7:02PM
0 0
profile picture
PopsicleStand
Posts: 6890 - Karma: 147
i tuned my skis after having them untuned for like a million years, and first run of the day im BOMBING switch down a wide open run underneath the lift, like really really fast, and i caught a freshly tuned edge and really really owned myself. i wanted to crawl under the snow and wait till spring.
Oct 10 2009 7:05PM
0 0
profile picture
Goglines
Posts: 429 - Karma: 303
first run 8:45 am: just got off the lift hungover as fuck. no one was with me - i had to work.. staring at a patch of ice off to the side, i caught an edge, supermanned it headfirst into the snow, ski hit the back of my head. i get up and keep skiing like wtf just happened..
2 minutes later my beanie felt wet and cold... i took it off and it was SOAKED with blood. shit was everywhere. skiied my ass down to ski patrol - they fucking wrapped me up like a mummy and i ended up with 4 staples in my head.

you still win.
Oct 10 2009 7:07PM
0 0
profile picture
=FAIL=
Posts: 536 - Karma: 47

360 over a 50 footer, first time, stomp it, right as my fist goes into the air, my pants fall down. end up ragdolling down into the fence. Lotsa people watching.  FUN

Oct 10 2009 7:07PM
0 0
profile picture
bootleg_BEN
Posts: 2499 - Karma: 44
No helmet?
Oct 10 2009 7:11PM
0 0
profile picture
Goglines
Posts: 429 - Karma: 303
no. stupid i know.
Oct 10 2009 7:12PM
0 0
profile picture
Afeld
Posts: 3516 - Karma: 85
same except of instead of a stop sign, it was a river..... luckily no water, just mud up to the top buckle of my boots
Oct 10 2009 7:18PM
0 0
profile picture
Santa-Cruz
Posts: 2236 - Karma: 11
i was ducking a rope and i caught my neck on it and clothesline my self and broke my collar bone

yea


Oct 10 2009 7:21PM
0 0
profile picture
Thenowhereman42
Posts: 5682 - Karma: 65
Last season someone threw a snowball at me from the chairlift and I was so stunned that I didn't remember to flip him off and hurl verbal threats at him before he was gone.
Oct 10 2009 7:25PM
0 0
profile picture
grifftang
Posts: 1277 - Karma: 14
i do this aaaalll day.

Oct 10 2009 7:28PM
0 0
profile picture
yourthemannowdog
Posts: 4541 - Karma: 313
I am not going to bother with posting mine, yours is so epicly bad i can't even attempt.
Oct 10 2009 7:49PM
0 0
profile picture
SethLangbauer
Posts: 1119 - Karma: 74
have done this before....
Oct 10 2009 8:06PM
0 0
profile picture
Uncle.Badness
Posts: 2545 - Karma: 55
I once forgot to uncross my skis while performing a screamin semen.
Oct 10 2009 8:32PM
0 0
profile picture
K_FRANK
Posts: 513 - Karma: 277
hahahaha +k bro i just lol'd
Oct 10 2009 8:39PM
0 0
profile picture
ROOS.
Posts: 1992 - Karma: 39
hahahah thats embarrassing


but you still win
Oct 10 2009 11:21PM
0 0
profile picture
hellomynameisjef
Posts: 5794 - Karma: 167
SHUT UP BEAR JEW YOU ARENT A JEW YOUR A BEAR YOUR NOT EVEN RELIGIOUS
Oct 10 2009 11:23PM
0 0
profile picture
no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
when i was little i was getting on the lift and i accidentally sat on someone else and we all fell off and they had to stop and back it up and everything
Oct 10 2009 11:31PM
0 0
profile picture
.Emerson.
Posts: 1548 - Karma: 16


Oct 10 2009 11:36PM
0 0
profile picture
double_D
Posts: 778 - Karma: 25
yardsale under the lift and look 15 min to find all my things
Oct 10 2009 11:48PM
0 0
profile picture
fountain.
Posts: 1399 - Karma: 80
in gaper days i thought i would be badass if i gaper tucked down a blue run than my dad would take a picture of me at the bottom and it would be blurry and look like i was flying, but instead i ate shit and spend the next hour trying to figure out how to put my ski on. haha but you still win.
Oct 11 2009 12:27AM
0 0
profile picture
grifftang
Posts: 1277 - Karma: 14
since this isnt the case i feel like i should tell my story

it was spring skiing and it had just sorta rained/snowed combo, so the snow was wet as fuck and heavy.
i went off the trail to catch basically my last powder of the year and i fell into like a 3 foot hole that was like an underground river. took me at least 15m to dig my ski up and get outta there
Oct 11 2009 12:38AM
0 0
profile picture
KarmaInitiative
Posts: 2028 - Karma: 174
a bunch of years ago i was in steamboat with the fam and i was feelin real sick. we decide to call it a half day and go back to the condo. we ski down, and on a traverse near the bottom, i just cant hold it. still skiing, i spread my skis, bend over and start leaving a trail of vomit until i collapsed on the side of the trail
Oct 11 2009 12:52AM
0 0
profile picture
Lanceasaurus
Posts: 925 - Karma: 109
does it get better?
Oct 11 2009 12:55AM
0 0
profile picture
prontocuts.com
Posts: 5244 - Karma: 42
I feel your pain.

The doctor once gave me some anti biotics that gave me insane squirts, I couldnt control it, my body pooped out every possible thing. It was a bad, bad day


atleast I wasnt skiing though
Oct 11 2009 1:21AM
0 0
profile picture
GayWolf420
Posts: 37576 - Karma: 122,122
holy shit. i got the squirts right now, fucking hell
Oct 11 2009 1:22AM
0 0
profile picture
[Dawn
Posts: 1718 - Karma: 69
this could be taken very, very... very wrongly.
Oct 11 2009 1:44AM
0 0
profile picture
Armanzoid
Posts: 2453 - Karma: 26
I was ripping switch thinking I was all badass going by gapers. I'm not paying attention, and hit a weird roller switch, and catch my tails and backslap to my skull.
Oct 11 2009 2:30AM
0 0
profile picture
AdolfShitler
Posts: 1618 - Karma: 32
i pooped in teh toilet
Oct 11 2009 2:37AM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)