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the worst pick up lines =)
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this is one of the wors pick ups that i have heard in a bar couple of weeks ago:
This isn't a beer belly, It'a a fuel tank for a love machine.
in next table we laught our ass out
Me need snow!!
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The word is 'legs'. Go back to my place and spread the word.
'Victory? We're French, we don't even have a word for it.'
Beer is my copilot.
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Not a pick up line but I saw this bumper sticker the other day:
I'm not losing hair, I'm getting head
I like my chicks like my whips, topless
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Worst pickup line:
'Sorry I broke your nose. How about a date?'
My friend (sadly) used this.....
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'If I were to dress up like an animal, I would fuck what I was' - DP
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would you like your oil checked?
'What da fack, man? I don undrstand.' Alex the crazy french kid.
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ok so this new years i (and about the rest of my school) heard this really bad one. my friend, shit faced and double fisting bud lights, walks up to this girl from Ft. Collins and said, and i quote: 'Somebody over there said... that you wanted to suck my dick.' after everybody shut up and looked at him, he just kind of stumbled away. that was great
CO represent!!!
'Nobody has ever skied the K-12 and lived!'
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How do you like your eggs...Over easy, scrambled or fertilized?
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promise her a donkey punch
You cant hug your children with nuclear arms!
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standing outside in the cold with shorts on, go up to a chick and ask (politly) 'my legs are cold.... can you get on your knees and hug them to keep them warm for me?'
.dave.
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nice shoes wanna fuck?
Take It All
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you know what would look good on you? me.
'Im a rageoholic, Im addicted to rageohol!' -Homer
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you must wash your clothes in windex, b/c i can see myself in your pants
excuse me miss, if you lost your virginity, can i have hte box it came in
If I were rubber and you were glue, would you let me pull down your pants and stick it in you?
some of those courtesy of brian class
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The only real drug problem is scoring real good drugs.
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Yep those are all bad!
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Good friends tell you about the time they nailed that broad....BEST friends reach over, tag your hand, and say 'YOUR TURN'
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get that out of the way, then go live in an old folks home, then you should get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then on your first day at work you should get a gold watch. You work 40 years until you are young enough to enjoy your retirement, you go drinking and partying, then get ready for high school. You go to elementary school, become a kid, you play, you have no responsiblities, you become a little baby, you go back and spend your last 9 months floating around in a spa and then you finish up as an orgasm!
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hey alpentalik, i have heard one like that only the one i heard goes:
how do you like your eggs in the morning? Fertilised?
~Get a haircut and get a real job~
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'Hey, fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Yulanda?'
'If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i together.'
'Sorry, I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?'
'Bob gets drunk in a park alone and gets arrested for getting in a fight with a group of teenage girls.'
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those suck. you and your pickup lines should all burn in hell. sorry. that wasn't very nice
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'I'm not a deadbeat, low life kid that's going to be a high school dropout.' - Tanner Hall...
...Well said, Tanner.
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Hi, im looking for Sex, im i looking in the right direction?
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Paulou
Call me the bus driver cause im going to take you to school
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'That shirt looks very becoming on you, of course, if I was on you I'd be cumming too.'
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'hi, my name is dave'
also works quite well with:
'hi, my name is darryl.' haha! i've heard that one bomb a couple times.
.
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yo, mc....my dick is longer than your skis. - mr. jeff schmuck
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roses are red and apples are sour open your leags and i'll show you some power.
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*** YOU GOT MORE LEGS THAN A BUCKET OF CHICKEN ***
--- Endless Winter ---
>Tim
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dude - your giving away all my secrets.... - 'hi my name is Dave' that is the heavy artilary.... lol.
'What da fack, man? I don undrstand.' Alex the crazy french kid.
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If I told you that you had a great body would you hold it against me?
**NOTE** I tried this on Steve (SkierX) and he didn't get it. 'heheh, thanks, and no, I find it flattering' So use at your own Risk!!
~Juliet~
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Hahaha that's funny....
'Bob gets drunk in a park alone and gets arrested for getting in a fight with a group of teenage girls.'
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alright....this is curtesy of a drunk norwegian kid at a comp in michigan....(to 2 girls we didnt know) 'hey ladies...wanna come back to my room for some foreplay???' (apparently in norway, foreplay is listening to music and drinking before going to a club...we cleard this up with him pretty quickly)
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'i know heaven exists because you exist'
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your friendly newfie
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damn baby.. do you have a keg in your pants... coz i wanna tap that ass...
now thats quaility shit right there....
later
EMILIE
so maybe if life is what everyone says that it is then it will be fine... and everything will turn out right in the end.. but look @ whos telling you this shit.. look @ what theyve done and where they are... they just want you to believe that life is good and that there is a point in living it.. but there really isnt... excpet for the people like us who have skiing.. theres our point in surviving life....later....EMILIE
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Straight out of Biodome:
-Are you tired?
-No, why?
-Because you've been running through my mind all day.
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'The Chinese believe, that if you find a discarded panda tooth, you have the power to summon godzilla.'- Sifl and Olly
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Heres another:
'Can I roto-root your clogged pipe?'
ew.
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'The Chinese believe, that if you find a discarded panda tooth, you have the power to summon godzilla.'- Sifl and Olly
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Hmm... I used this one on Brooke today
Me: 'Hey Brooke are you a girl?'
Brooke: 'Um.. yes why?'
Me: 'Hahaha.. prove it!!!'
haha... okay so I'm stupid... have a great day
~Join the Brooke fan club today!!!~
*Proud Resident of the Dirty Part of Surrey*
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'those clothes are becoming on you, if i were on you i'd be cumming too.'
bunch of f**kin' savages in this town
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'I'm trying to determine after years of therapy and lots of testing, whether or not I'm allergic to sex.'
'Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out....) Would you like to?'
'Go up to a girl in a bar, and slip your arm around her, and say, 'Hi Laura!' She says, 'I'm not Laura!' And you say, as your hand slips a little lower, 'But you sure feel like her!'
'those boobs look heavy can i hold them up for you?'
kids:hey giligan! did u eat the skipper
tommyboy:you better pray to the god you skinny little punks that this wind doesnt pick up or else ill come over there and jam an oar up your ass!!!
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I'm an American Express lover, you don't want to go home without me.
I got nothin.
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Hey! I lost my puppy, can you help me find him? i think he ran over into that cheap motel room!!!!
and
Bond. James Bond
All times are Eastern (-5)
