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December, 2024

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Text msg from last night

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j-d-s
Posts: 119 - Karma: 11
havnt seen it posted before, sorry if it has. pretty self explanitory.

(216): Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
(440): Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
(216): Holy shit r u serious? How?
(440): Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.

http://http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/worst-nights/1

soo many good ones. enjoy




Jun 12 2009 9:13AM
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twin-tip-hero
Posts: 2896 - Karma: 277
i just loled a little.
Jun 12 2009 9:23AM
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dilla_says_go
Posts: 5333 - Karma: 168
hahahah

(212): i want you now
(916): you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this


Jun 12 2009 9:43AM
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Jib-Life
Posts: 1086 - Karma: -4
ahahahahahahahahahah.

the first one posted was really not that funny, but this one def got me giggling.
Jun 12 2009 9:50AM
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j-d-s
Posts: 119 - Karma: 11
(206): I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
(425): There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Jun 12 2009 9:53AM
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Dan-Man
Posts: 7488 - Karma: 3,623
I live for the LULZ
Jun 12 2009 11:08AM
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benJAHmin
Posts: 519 - Karma: 20
(602): So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
(623): What did she do!?
(602): I didn't tell her...
Jun 12 2009 11:26AM
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RiSKIe
Posts: 176 - Karma: 11
awesome site
Jun 12 2009 11:35AM
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kaitlynmew
Posts: 11 - Karma: 10
Laughed at all
Jun 12 2009 12:42PM
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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
(956) i dident searchbar, yeah...
Jun 12 2009 12:56PM
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geet
Posts: 2436 - Karma: 6
repost but still hilarious
Jun 12 2009 12:58PM
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Mavrck
Posts: 2765 - Karma: 27
lol'd so hard

(443): So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Jun 12 2009 1:02PM
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Hack.The.Pow.
Posts: 1294 - Karma: 25
(201): she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
hahahah

btw if those numbers before are area codes that happened in my district lol
Jun 12 2009 1:07PM
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tinkytwinky
Posts: 2451 - Karma: 1,571
lolz
Jun 12 2009 1:19PM
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k-rob
Posts: 14217 - Karma: 2,892
this one is win:

(323): You got in a fight last night?
(818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
(323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Jun 12 2009 1:33PM
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SteezyOhio
Posts: 6044 - Karma: 60
lawlz

(440): eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
(1-440): just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Jun 12 2009 2:24PM
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jason...
Posts: 9006 - Karma: 780
(480): I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral
Jun 12 2009 2:41PM
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wh@t
Posts: 6204 - Karma: 51
no waaaay. that could never fit in a text message. im calling bullshit. or shenanigans. or alias.
Jun 12 2009 2:45PM
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carbon.pulse
Posts: 3348 - Karma: 23
I lold hard
Jun 12 2009 3:17PM
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yelsel
Posts: 12967 - Karma: 3,451

Hahaha

(216): My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.

(815): Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
(717): one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
(856): I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Jun 12 2009 3:19PM
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Half-Blood
Posts: 1770 - Karma: 385
(209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
(1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Jun 12 2009 8:16PM
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rj.
Posts: 3323 - Karma: 28
this = best
Jun 12 2009 8:34PM
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Chickendodo
Posts: 1426 - Karma: 33
Repost but...

Some of these are win.

Fmylife is still better.  This is just a cheap knock off with much more potential for lies.
Jun 12 2009 8:34PM
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ECski
Posts: 976 - Karma: 13
hahahaha that is hilarious, best one ive seen
Jun 12 2009 9:12PM
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Smuffy
Posts: 4686 - Karma: 3,408
bahahaha
Jun 12 2009 9:21PM
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Yeezus
Posts: 3350 - Karma: 469
no it can fit if its from the same provider to the same provider ie: verizon to verizon att to att
Jun 12 2009 9:30PM
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crazyfuck
Posts: 5968 - Karma: -7
iPhones can send and receive huge texts.
Jun 12 2009 9:35PM
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Paulage
Posts: 521 - Karma: 102
(757): I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"


(404): Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
(1-404): Two?
(404): Two.


(850): It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking


(678): What are you drinking?
(404): Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Jun 12 2009 9:39PM
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EasyEast
Posts: 1983 - Karma: 118
i lolled hard at this whole thread good stuff
Jun 12 2009 9:53PM
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Chronic_
Posts: 1730 - Karma: 1,602
hahahaha quality
Jun 12 2009 9:56PM
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_TK_
Posts: 467 - Karma: 128

hahahhahahahahahahhaahhha

Jun 12 2009 9:59PM
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kthnxbai.
Posts: 2847 - Karma: 179
str8 lawls
Jun 12 2009 11:20PM
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ninjahappy
Posts: 399 - Karma: 14
(617): dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
hahaha i lol'd
Jun 12 2009 11:46PM
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connoroh
Posts: 2333 - Karma: 246
(416): Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home.
Jun 12 2009 11:53PM
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MayorWest
Posts: 1596 - Karma: 160
sick tits mcgeee
Jun 13 2009 12:10AM
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Keith_M
Posts: 796 - Karma: 772
hahaha
Jun 13 2009 1:17AM
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COskier
Posts: 1066 - Karma: 131
This guy is awesome:

(407): I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Jun 13 2009 1:38AM
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