Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

NS CONFESSIONS

profile picture
ChronicLines
Posts: 951 - Karma: 61
Alright, here's the deal.  I got this from some other forum and since many of you don't explore other forums, it's probably pretty new and incredibly simple.

A lot of people have horribly funny things they would only share if guaranteed anonymity, well now is your chance.

Send your hilarious, disturbing, or irrelevant stories to nsconfessions@gmail.com by using this website.

http://anonymouse.org/anonemail.html

Cliff notes!
1.  Go to http://anonymouse.org/anonemail.html
2.  Enter nsconfessions@gmail.com in the "to" field.
3.  Type your awesome story/confession
4.  It will get posted in this thread for an insane amount of lols.
Jan 22 2009 3:43PM
1 0
profile picture
Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
this is the way i understood it:

The cousin ECB fucked is not the same cousin as the one in the story you quoted I believe. I don't think ECB fucked the cousin in the story you quoted, but his suitemate did.
Jul 26 2010 8:35AM
0 0
profile picture
gus555
Posts: 4170 - Karma: 34
i eat the first and last meal of every sunday naked
Jul 26 2010 11:09AM
0 0
profile picture
ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
Same cousin.

FML.
Jul 26 2010 11:11AM
0 0
profile picture
Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
lol tru. my bad, guess i misunderstood
Jul 26 2010 11:12AM
0 0
profile picture
pigglywiggly
Posts: 4482 - Karma: 305
i thought it was your second cousin?
Jul 26 2010 11:29AM
0 0
profile picture
TheHuggyBear
Posts: 1762 - Karma: 313
So like most high school boys I decided to go crazy my senior year. So im seeing this girl at the time and everything was going really well, I was getting head every time i saw her(yea she was saving herself then..now shes a whore lol). Anyways she decides shes too tired to head out to this kids party goin on, which is a really good thing because I got mad drunk and fooled around with this girl that my girlfriend hated. So no big deal, I felt like an ass but nobody would ever find out..right. So now 2 weeks later, my girlfriend gets word of the incident of course and we take a little break from seein each other. So no I have two weeks to do whatever, (flashback two years:I hook up with this girl and she stalks me ..and still is to this day) Now I see my stalker at another party so what does my drunk mind say.."easy pussy hell yea" so I have a really good night lol. Now that im a freshman in college..all 3 of these girls are best friends and tell every girl in mankind that i know about everything..I havent gotten kissed in six months

Jul 26 2010 12:27PM
0 0
profile picture
TheHuggyBear
Posts: 1762 - Karma: 313
ha jk about the last part i got some last night, point is to all you young NS dont fuck with girls they will get ya backand yes they do tell girls to avoid me and it sucks though
Jul 26 2010 12:36PM
0 0
profile picture
ECB
Posts: 6991 - Karma: 622
Don't fuck with girls? So fuck guys instead is what you are saying? Your logic might be a tad off, but respectable.
Jul 26 2010 12:36PM
0 0
profile picture
SteezeBall
Posts: 350 - Karma: 12
sounds like a petition to have butt flaps on NS tall teezys.
Jul 26 2010 4:16PM
0 0
profile picture
sirschralpalot.
Posts: 453 - Karma: 18
so i was seeing a movie with some of my buddies and right before the movie we got mexican food, so i really had to shit. so about halfway through the movie i went to the bathroom literally about to shit my pants and all the fucking stalls were full. so i could not hold and decided to shit in the urinal. anyway, when i was washing my hands a guy came in to take a piss at the urinal i shat in and threw up instantly. proudest moment of my life haha
Jul 26 2010 4:36PM
0 0
profile picture
bromigo
Posts: 630 - Karma: 20
thats what i got out of it
Jul 26 2010 4:42PM
0 0
profile picture
cubber
Posts: 1933 - Karma: 638
today i pooped but we had no tp. so i wiped with a styrofoam cup. bitch.
Jul 27 2010 8:50PM
0 0
profile picture
1337
Posts: 31053 - Karma: 29,231
hahahahahahaa how'd that work out for you
Jul 27 2010 8:58PM
0 0
profile picture
Lemuel
Posts: 14486 - Karma: 10,632
You're back!

The one time I tried AC Slatering my mom walked in on me.
Jul 27 2010 9:05PM
0 0
profile picture
HenniferLopez
Posts: 1319 - Karma: 136
its like a squeegee...duh.
Jul 27 2010 9:58PM
0 0
profile picture
no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
i got mad at my sister when i was little and wiped my ass with her monogramed washcloth
Jul 27 2010 10:07PM
0 0
profile picture
grown-ninja
Posts: 3031 - Karma: 175
started a rummer back in highschool i think freshman yea that a girl i was feeling wore ass-pads, years later people still call her out on it, and continued to call her ass-pad...still doesnt know it was me
Jul 27 2010 10:08PM
0 0
profile picture
no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
ok...this one's hard...my 4th grade friend and i showed eachother our penises at a sleepover...
Jul 27 2010 10:12PM
0 0
profile picture
0123456789
Posts: 9226 - Karma: 148
best way to shit ever, im shitting now and im disappointed i didnt think to slater it
Jul 28 2010 9:15AM
0 0
profile picture
technique.
Posts: 1538 - Karma: 308
thats nice that youve kept your friendship going since 4th grade.

oh how i kid
Jul 28 2010 11:32AM
0 0
profile picture
*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15080 - Karma: 9,152
lolololol
whats ac slatering?
Jul 28 2010 11:36AM
0 0
profile picture
Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
when you shit, you turn around and face the tank instead. because ac slater used to always sit like that in saved by the bell
Jul 28 2010 11:38AM
0 0
profile picture
*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15080 - Karma: 9,152
ahhh. i need to try that.
Jul 28 2010 11:39AM
0 0
profile picture
have.faith
Posts: 338 - Karma: 97
It's a rarity for me to cry at books, movies ect but that was just way too deep.
Jul 28 2010 12:53PM
0 0
profile picture
Craze
Posts: 1132 - Karma: 423
I cant believe i never thought of this. That would making surfing newschoolers while shitting with a laptop so much easier, just put it on the tank. Yes!
Jul 29 2010 10:40AM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
You sir, are a genius.
Jul 29 2010 10:46AM
0 0
profile picture
Oreos
Posts: 1207 - Karma: 38
we developed a technique called the bear when tp had ran out, newspapers weren't around (you do however get the ink on your ass from this) and baby whipes were lacking.

the basics are you shit, you jump in the shower, you use your hand as toilet paper. rinse and repeat.

at a rugby club social (think american jock fest) we have these buckets called bunder bins about the size of a wheelie bin. there were designated for being sick in and there were about 6 of then usually.

so through months of heavy uni drinking we had found out that chewing gum helps you not chunder (good tip there) so after seeing off my god knows what number pint of snakebite (beer, cider, and squash) i was being sick when i saw my chewing gum fall out of my mouth and into a full bunder bin. in my drunken state i decided that it was worth rescuing so i delved my hand into the bid, felt around a bit, recovered my chewing gum and chucked in straight in my mouth = ) on this momentous night (it was a special social) i had also found the idea of walking to the toilet too arduous so i consiously stood there and pissed myself. i think i hooked up with a girl that night too.

along the same lines i was on a stool seeing off a jug (4 pints) where to rule is if you are sick someone will catch you sick in a pint glass and give you to option of wearing it or drinking it. i chose the later.

one more bro story.
i had gone back to this girls place in halls and after doing the dirty she left the room for a reason i can't remember. i really needed a piss and unwilling to walk around a strange place naked i decided to piss down the side of her bed. after this i thought it was time to leave before she returned so as it was cold out i also stole her bed sheets to wrap up in.

bring on the bro hate.
Jul 29 2010 11:48AM
0 0
profile picture
Oreos
Posts: 1207 - Karma: 38
the rule* is
Jul 29 2010 11:52AM
0 0
profile picture
PhaedeD
Posts: 11498 - Karma: 327
dudddeee me 2 she more or less threw her self on me... she wasnt a wale or anything just a little pudge. whatever it was at some club and i was blacked out pouring tequila in peoples mouth and some how i ended up with some chick making out with me. lol
Jul 29 2010 12:07PM
0 0
profile picture
Sitch.
Posts: 841 - Karma: 13
haha best one !!  +K
Jul 29 2010 1:16PM
0 0
profile picture
danderson.
Posts: 6560 - Karma: 5,252

I don't even know how to respond to that.

Jul 29 2010 1:35PM
0 0
profile picture
wesley.
Posts: 6483 - Karma: 1,049
i did today. it was quite fun
Jul 29 2010 5:55PM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
Same.  I even had my computer and was playing Transformice right on the tank.
Jul 29 2010 7:24PM
0 0
profile picture
theBearJew
Posts: 10951 - Karma: 15,633
One day I decided to go to Moe's for lunch and get a nice burrito. I also ate queso there too. I got home a few hours later and had to pee. I was standing up while peeing and sometimes you know how you have to fart while pissing? Well I had to so I farted. The fart smelt like total ass btw. I soon realized that I had to poop while I was wizzing. So once I finished pissing, I sat down to take a dump. When I sat down I couldn't help but notice the pile of poop that was on the floor. Yep... I shit on the floor.
Jul 30 2010 6:44PM
0 0
profile picture
applejuice.
Posts: 5506 - Karma: 1,512
i put my friends picture on paleisthenewtan.com


Jul 31 2010 12:33AM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
That website is disgusting.
Jul 31 2010 12:41AM
0 0
profile picture
applejuice.
Posts: 5506 - Karma: 1,512
yeah well she had to be put on there. it's the first new pic, the striped shirt.
Jul 31 2010 12:42AM
0 0
profile picture
wesley.
Posts: 6483 - Karma: 1,049
o shit. thats horrible
Jul 31 2010 12:45AM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
Holy fuck I was so grossed out by that one.  And some of the tan lines are disgusting too.
Jul 31 2010 12:48AM
0 0
profile picture
applejuice.
Posts: 5506 - Karma: 1,512
she's a cute girl but her tanning just destroys her

Click for larger image
Jul 31 2010 12:51AM
0 0
profile picture
wesley.
Posts: 6483 - Karma: 1,049
one on the right? she doesnt look like she tans. one on the left also doesnt really
Jul 31 2010 12:53AM
0 0
profile picture
applejuice.
Posts: 5506 - Karma: 1,512
the one on the right is the same girl from the pic i put on paleisthenewtan (striped shirt).
Jul 31 2010 12:54AM
0 0
profile picture
wesley.
Posts: 6483 - Karma: 1,049
DAMN. she better stop. and i think tanning is like growing cancer on you. if you use tanning beds or not
Jul 31 2010 12:55AM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
Exactly.  Sunscreen, tshirts when not in water, and hats are the way to go.
Jul 31 2010 12:56AM
0 0
profile picture
applejuice.
Posts: 5506 - Karma: 1,512
i will admit i go tanning but i do it in moderation and i've never ever came close to looking like that.
Jul 31 2010 12:59AM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
Yeah, I have fallen asleep on lawn chairs and stuff like that before, but I always had sunscreen on like that.  But I'm a guy, so I don't tan really.  It's fine to tan a bit though, but to an extent.
Jul 31 2010 1:09AM
0 0
profile picture
CrunkNugget
Posts: 1279 - Karma: 16
thrads
Jul 31 2010 3:20AM
0 0
profile picture
0123456789
Posts: 9226 - Karma: 148
yea bro cause chicks like dueds who are pale with a sweet farmers tan
Jul 31 2010 1:00PM
0 0
profile picture
arandomname
Posts: 1989 - Karma: 18
I was exaggerating a bit.  But if I'm out in the sun, I'm wearing sunscreen.  I feel like you tan faster with sunscreen because you don't go turning red.
Jul 31 2010 1:02PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)