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By accident I branded my friend with a flaming sword..

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CRL
Posts: 67 - Karma: 122
So me and my friends were all chillin in the backyard with a little bonfire. We were putting long sharp sticks in the fire and making flaming swords out of them (just for giggles). then my brother starts having a pretend sword fight with them. Looks like fun so I joined in. While my bro was making my friend walk backwards. I stuck my flaming wooden sword out and jabbed it in his butt and ended up stabbing him right in the bare ass cheek. How this happened, i dont know because he had jeans on. Anyway, he screams and runs into the house. In the long run he ended up having a massive burn (that looks like a brand in a cow), right on his ass.

What should I tell him to tell his parents about what happened to his ass?
Jan 2 2009 11:54PM
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charmander
Posts: 10636 - Karma: 370
haha

"i shanked him with a stick, but it was on fire"

tell his parents that
Jan 2 2009 11:56PM
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Style+eeze
Posts: 6901 - Karma: 551
holy shit. that's bad... i have no idea what to tell his parents, or you should let him do it, or you shouldn't do it at all
Jan 2 2009 11:57PM
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onearmwanderer
Posts: 1153 - Karma: 31


^ haha ya something like that.  i dont think there is any good excuse that could be made up for something like that happening
Jan 2 2009 11:58PM
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Slinger1x1
Posts: 8853 - Karma: 66
god, that story was so stupid it made me laugh. how in the word did you hit his bare ass?

well, unless hes like 10 and tells your parents or his parents, you wouldnt have to tell them anything...

but if you do, just say he was mooning you and you decided to beat his ass and didnt realize the tick you picked up was on fire
Jan 2 2009 11:59PM
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SHampson
Posts: 2355 - Karma: 1,180
haha something like that happened when i was little.  We were throwing rocks from a creek seeing how many we could get on to a trampoline on a little hill above.  THen we decided  it would be fun if there were people jumping on it while we threw them.  I ended up hitting my friend in the head, big bloody mess.  He went to the hospital for stitches.  here is what we said though:  We were playing in the creek skipping rocks, and i skipped one, it came close to my friend.  So he jumped out of the way and his head hit a big boulder in the creek. 

Lie, or tell the truth.  I would tell the truth though, even though i lied.
Jan 3 2009 12:06AM
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CRL
Posts: 67 - Karma: 122
i think ill say he was trying to put the fire out by shitting on it, but he fell in and burned his bare bottom on the hot coals
Jan 3 2009 1:27AM
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WhiteBurd
Posts: 1127 - Karma: 98
that is hilarious.
i branded a kid once in metals class
Jan 3 2009 1:30AM
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cfox
Posts: 2286 - Karma: 38
hahaha hella funny
Jan 3 2009 2:38AM
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cclan
Posts: 742 - Karma: 19
why doesnt he jsut... not tell his parents?
Jan 3 2009 2:40AM
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Elijah.
Posts: 9322 - Karma: 76
I have a story thats similar to that... My little brother and I used to throw rocks at each other from little beach bunkers we made when we hit up the Olympic coast. I pegged him pretty hard one time right in the forehead and it got ended quickly.
Jan 3 2009 3:11AM
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ski93
Posts: 1280 - Karma: 84
lol great story
Jan 3 2009 3:15AM
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D-HAWK
Posts: 890 - Karma: 10
ICON THIEF!
Jan 3 2009 3:20AM
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GingerKid08
Posts: 1320 - Karma: 13
I have a story like that. When I was around 12 I was playing with a fat black girl in my neighborhood and we were throwing rocks at other rocks that were lying on the sidewalk. I don't know why, we were trying to break the rocks or something. Anyway, she threw her rock, then went to pick it back up at the same time as I hucked my BIG fucking rock and it smashed her hand. She screamed bloody murder and the whole neighborhood heard so i couldn't come up with excuses. She had a cast for like 3 months.
Jan 3 2009 3:21AM
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Elijah.
Posts: 9322 - Karma: 76
I can totally see that happening hahaha... it just played out in my head and it was pretty funny.
Jan 3 2009 3:26AM
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Powdered_Donuts
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 187
                                                
Jan 3 2009 3:28AM
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ROOS.
Posts: 1992 - Karma: 39
i have a story that involves bleeding foreheads. i was screwing around with some golf clubs in my grandparents yard, and me and this girl were just making divots in the lawn, but she stood really close to me when i wound up and i hit her in the forehead with the golf club and then she went to the emergency room, my divot making game was over.
Jan 3 2009 3:39AM
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mmallender.
Posts: 5805 - Karma: 936
if youre really worried about his parents being upset, tell them the truth, you had a flaming stick in your hand (you could make something up about why you had a hot stick, like marshmallows and it caught on fire) and you had it out of the fire and he backed into it. say something along the lines of that and itll seem like a simple mistake
Jan 3 2009 4:37AM
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Clifford996
Posts: 1288 - Karma: 28
why would his parents see his ass? unless you stabbed a 4 year old...

im pretty sure i could not let my parents see my bare ass for a little while...
Jan 3 2009 4:44AM
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gmack24
Posts: 4636 - Karma: 31
I was in a fraternity at school (best dudes Ive ever met in my life and absolutely no gay shit to get in, just a few things that took some heart and dedication), I know, so gay, we fucked each other after lubing up in a pool of ky jelly....but I knew a fraternity that initiated their guys by bringing them out to a snowy field, using a real gun w/ ammo after discharging, pointing it at them and telling them to dig their graves, then forcing them to be branded. Most fucked up thing me or any of my brothers had ever heard
Jan 3 2009 4:53AM
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Peach.
Posts: 3879 - Karma: 933
A while back a friend of mine woke up with a branded cross on his arm he has no fuckin idea how it got there(there was a tiny bit of partying involved)
Jan 3 2009 11:51AM
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dukeski
Posts: 34 - Karma: 10
wait you're saying fucking each other isn't gay?
Jan 3 2009 1:10PM
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grifter
Posts: 933 - Karma: 102
I just spat out Jack Daniels and a chocolate biscuit reading that, funny as fuck.
Jan 3 2009 2:16PM
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Peach.
Posts: 3879 - Karma: 933
You just made me spit out my white castle burger thinking about that combination
Jan 3 2009 3:20PM
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solitaryman
Posts: 3578 - Karma: 123
Why would his parents be looking at his ass anyways..
Jan 3 2009 5:39PM
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spen-cer
Posts: 1694 - Karma: 652
haha funny story, a girl at my school who isnt exactly bright was wasted with some other girls and ended up branding the back of one of them with a spatula. why? i dont know, she is fucking retarded. The girl who got burned didnt care but a couple weeks later it got infected and now the girls mom has pressed charges.. she is getting fingerprints, cuffed and has a court hearing. Oh ya the girl who did the burning is 15.
Moral of the Story: make sure that shit doesnt get infected!
Jan 3 2009 5:51PM
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JBurke4
Posts: 22 - Karma: 10
Hey maybe next time keep your flaming sick away from his ass and what to tell his parents i have no idea
Jan 3 2009 11:58PM
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Jay31
Posts: 796 - Karma: 11
This definately gets my vote for funniest thread title of the year!
Jan 4 2009 12:55AM
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CRL
Posts: 67 - Karma: 122
thanks 4 the advice guyz
Jan 4 2009 9:58PM
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Moisty_Goat
Posts: 601 - Karma: 31

how old are you guys?

I just don't understand why his parents would even have to know.

Are they nudists?

Jan 4 2009 10:13PM
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doublexl
Posts: 8407 - Karma: 27
haha i thought the same thing.
Jan 5 2009 1:37AM
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Remora
Posts: 196 - Karma: 11
Why did he have no pants?

...were you guys making a Porno for Pyros vid?
Jan 5 2009 11:47AM
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freeze_pooter
Posts: 3296 - Karma: 16
are you being paid to write a story that has " the house " in it?
Jan 5 2009 1:20PM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 126
ugh yeah one time my friend was pissing at the beach and we were throwing rocks near him, and he kept freaking out, and just as i was saying something like dont be a pussy we're not really gonna hit you, my rock bounced twice in ways that seemed to defy physics and just smoked him right in the face, i felt so bad
Jan 5 2009 1:53PM
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low_fidelity
Posts: 2673 - Karma: 118
last
Jan 6 2009 10:53PM
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