Stupidest Story you've ever heard/said

a joke: Pink ping pong balls

A day before his 15th birthday, the son of a wealthy family was asked by his father, `Well my son, what would you like for your birthday?'

The son hesitated a moment and his father's thoughts leapt ahead to a new computer and similar things. However, his son had had a new computer only recently and could have a new one any time he wished.

Finally, the son said, `Father, I have everything a boy could wish for, but there is one thing I would really like. I would love to have a pink ping pong ball.'

The father was rather astonished at this wish, but said, `If it is a pink ping pong ball that you want, a pink ping pong ball you shall have.'

And so, the next day, the son was given as his bithday present a pink ping pong ball.

The boy took the ball to his room and the next morning the pink ping pong ball was gone. The father was mildly surprised but decided not to say anything. The pink ping pong ball, however, was never seen again.

The next year, a day before his 16th birthday, the father asked his son what he would like for his birthday.

`Father,' replied the son, `I have everything a boy could possibly wish for, but there is one thing I would really, really like. I would love to have a tenpack of pink ping pong balls.'

The father was more surprised than the year before, but kept his curiosity at bay, for he knew that his son had a right for privacy. he said therefore, `If it is a tenpack of pink ping pong balls that you want, a tenpack of pink ping pong balls you shall have.'

And so, the next day, the son was given as his birthday present a tenpack of pink ping pong balls.

The boy took the tenpack of balls to his room and the next morning, not a single ball remained, merely the empty husk of the tenpack. The father wondered where ten pink ping pong balls might disappear to, but decided not to say anything. The pink ping pong balls, however, were never seen again.

The next year, a day before his 17th birthday, the son was asked by his father what he would like for his birthday.

`Father,' said the son to this, `I have everything a boy could wish for, but one thing would make my happiness complete. I would dearly want a carton of pink ping pong balls.'

The father was beyond surprise, but decided to make sure he had not misheard. `A carton of pink ping pong balls?'

`A carton of pink ping pong balls,' the boy confirmed.

`I can't understand your fascination with pink ping pong balls,' said the father, `but if it is a carton of pink ping pong balls that you want, it is a carton of pink ping pong balls that you shall have.'

And so, the next day, the boy was given as his birthday present a carton of pink ping pong balls.

The boy was delighted and took the carton to his room. The next day, miraculously (as if by magic, even) the pink ping pong balls had all disappeared.

`Dear son,' said the father, `I must ask now, what do you do with all those pink ping pong balls?'

The son, however, was reluctant to tell him. `Please humour me, dear father.'

The carton of pink ping pong balls, however, was never seen again.

The next year, it was clear that the son would get a car, but the father felt that, perhaps, his son also had some other wish apart from the obvious. So, one day before the son's 18th birthday, the father asked him whether he had a special wish for his birthday.

`Dearest father,' the son started, `I have everything a young man could possibly want, but there is one craving in me. I would, more than anything, want a warehouse full of pink ping pong balls.'

One of these years, his father thought, I should get to the bottom of this. However, he decided to humour his son's wish. At least he had been wise enough to buy shares in a pink ping pong ball factory.

The next day, the son was given the address of a warehouse where all his new pink ping pong balls were stored. The son was delighted and decided to spend the next night in the warehouse rather than at home.

The following morning, the son stepped out of the warehouse, but it seemed to be empty otherwise. The father had a closer look and indeed, apart from empty cardboard boxes, nothing was left inside the warehouse. No pink ping pong balls were left.

The following year, one day before the son's 19th birthday, the father braced himself for another warehouse of pink ping pong balls. He asked his son what his deepest desire was and he had not been entirely wrong.

`Father, you have made me very happy these last years and this year I ask of you a shipload of pink ping pong balls if at all possible.'

It was possible, if only because the father had by now bought each and every factory of pink ping pong balls in the country.

The next day, the father took his son to the harbour and showed him a huge tanker and told his son that there were millions, billions, trillions of pink ping pong balls in there.

`Father,' the son said, `You've made me very happy yet again.'

That night, the son spent on board the tanker.

The next morning, not a single of the pink ping pong balls could be found, but the son was happy.

A few days before his 20th birthday, however, the son had a terrible road accident and was taken to the hospital.

His father visited the young man in hospital. `My dear son! Can I bring you anything to make you feel better?'

Weakly, the son sat up in bed. `Father, dearest father, grant me this wish; just one tenpack of pink ping pong balls.'

The father held his son's hand tightly. `Whatever you wish my son, but I have to give you one condition. Even if it may be embarrassing, I must know what you did with all those pink ping pong balls.'

`Very well, father, but please indulge me first. I will tell you whatever you wish to know after you have given me the ten pink ping pong balls.'

The father thought that was fair enough and the next day brought his son the ten asked for pink ping pong balls. The son smiled weakly but seemed too weak to talk.

`Son, I leave these pink ping pong balls with you and shall come back tomorrow to ask of you what you have done with all those pink ping pong balls.'

The son nodded weakly.

The next day, less than surprisingly, no pink ping pong balls could be found in the son's hospital room.

`Now, my dearest son, apple of my eye, treasure of my life, please tell me what you did with all those pink ping pong balls,' the father requested.

The son nodded and the father gripped his hand tighter.

`I-' the son started and sat up a bit, swallowing with a dry mouth.

`I- I-'

Then he died.

damn

Oh you son of a gun.
I read the whole thing...

can i please have 5 mins of my life back

well i guess you succeeded, that was in the top 5 worst stories i have ever heard

i was waiting for the big ending, damnit

right near the end, i sorta assumed that he was going to die, but i figuerd, hey i may aswell give ita shot.
bad idea.

all that buildup for absolutely nothing.

hahah oh man! worst story ever!

i no im stupid for reading a story in the stupidest story youve ever heard thread bu seriously.... what the hell man

i wonder where they went

+k for wasting my life.

hahah ive heard that before, but with lots of different reasons for the ping pong balls.  +k man that gets people everytime.

Hahaha you ass

Two nickels and a dime:

One day there was a young man walking through the park and he heard a man say to a woman, "two nickels and a dime".

He was very curious what this meant and thought about it all the way to school the next day.  In school he asked his teacher, "what does two nickels and a dime mean?"  The teacher all of a sudden became furious and sent him to the principal's office.

He showed up at the principles office and the principal was waiting for him.  he said, "ive heard you were speaking foul language in class today, and i only ask to hear exactly what you said,".  The boy was like, "i really dont want to say it... its only gotten me into trouble"  the principal said, "its ok im a nice guy, just say it so i know how to deal with the situation,"  and the boy said, "ok... i just asked what two nickels and a dime means."  the principal suddenly turned red and took out a pile of papers and said "these are your expulsion papers and today was your last day at this school."

The boy was sent home and his dad was waiting for him.  The dad seemed to be very understanding but asked, "Son, i just want to know what you said to your teacher."  and the son said, "i am not going to say it because it has only gotten me into trouble"  the dad eventually forced it out of him and he said, "ok, i only asked what two nickels and a dime meant,".  The dad got pissed and kicked him out,".

the boy was walking around the streets and a police car pulled up.  the officer got out and asked the boy, "what are you doing walking around here?"  the boy told him that he was kicked out of the house by his dad.  the officer said,"oooh.  i see.  well there are laws against that sort of stuff so why dont you just hop in the cop car and ill drive you home.  the boy got in.  on the way to the house, the cop asked, "just wondering, what did you do to make your dad soo mad to kick you out of the house???"  the boy said, "nooooo way.  i have only gotten in alot of trouble for saying it and i do not want to say it."  the cop said, "ooh come on... im a good guy and i wont bust you for anything."  the boy said, "ok... i said, 'what does two nickels and a dime mean?'".  the cop was totally taken by suprise and became very mad.  he said, "thats it... your under arrest."  and the cop drove him to the cop station. 

The man went to court and the judge only asked one question. "what did you say?".  the boy was very reluctant but eventually was forced to say... he said, "i said,'what does two nickels and a dime mean?"  the judge said with out even thinking about it, "i sentence you to 50 years in prison."

the man spent his loooonngg 50 years in prison.  many times he was beaten up and bullied.  he never stopped wondering what two nickels and a dime meant..."

one day he was finally released from prison.  he spent the rest of his life working at mcdonalds because he didnt go to college.

One day he went on his  vacation in his life.  he went to a small farm resort in tennesee.  he was walking around a small city nearby and happend to see a store that was titled, "two nickels and a dime."  he became veerrryy excited that he would finnaalllly figure out what made his life such a misery and he sprinted acrossed the street to onlythe store and was hit by a car, being killed instantly.

Moral of the story: look both ways befor crossing the street

damn you. 

This one time, at band camp, this one girl like my friend, and so then, on like the last dAY,  i like, gave the girl my friends phone number cause my friend really didn't like her.  SO then I went and told my friend i gave away his phone number and then he began to strangle me, but then he stopped and i fell on the ground and then I found 20 dollars....SCrillA

James that sucked.

my threads, will post soon!!!!!!!

well a friend of mine was really drunk and he started to tell this story, he was going on a road driving with his dad and suddenly a cow crossed the road and they crush against it really hard; both were ok but the cow was on the floor aparently dead...so the police gets there and what our friend told us was that they needed to get the cow to the police station because it was witness...we were all staring at him speechless like wtf how can you lie like that or be soo drunk hahaha....

also some other time this same guy was coming back home also really drunk (here in chil we drink a lot haha) and he saw this guy walkingon the street and he invited him to sleep at his house and at the next morning he woke up almost not remembering anything with a stranger sleeping next to him hahaha, this was true though

i bet he shoved all the pink ping pong balls up his ass

i read it too hahah, but ive heard that before except with moth balls

i posted a different version of that same thing in a thread a couple weeks ago.....it gets em every time

my friend: is this story really worth your time?

ahhaha i love it

ya thats what i thought too.

great minds...

not really a story, but me and a friend were in Cornwall (England) Surfing, we went down to the beach one night and there were a load of surfers around this massive campfire, haha, me and my friend pretended to be South African for the whole night, it got me laid, no joke, and the girl took it amazingly well when she found out I wasn't south African... really, really well, she took it very well.

took it really really well.. in the mouth.