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Aiming pee

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sirjibsalot
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 19
everytime i go to the fucking bathroom i cant not piss on the seat i hate cleaning it up all time..
does anyone else have this proble
--To Be A Jibber You've Got To Be So Fresh, To Have Style And Finesse Way Above The Rest--
--Martin Snaps Is A Fag--just kidding--or am i?
Apr 8 2002 8:14PM
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tremblantripper
Posts: 1501 - Karma: 18
nah dude what you do, if you have a real long chair lift ride up, and ya gotta piss, you piss in a condom tie it up like a water balloon and huck it at racer kids!!



A good friend will bail you out of jail, but your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying 'That was fucking awesome!'
Apr 9 2002 6:18PM
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TAK
Posts: 5007 - Karma: 14
Hot DOG! that might just work!

Or was it Ski School. I think it was Ski School. Nevermind then.

Or just hold it. Good for the PC muscles.
-Gabe Lumintn

What this week's anagram?
Apr 9 2002 6:35PM
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tremblantripper
Posts: 1501 - Karma: 18
twas in ski school, if you wanna wok out the muscles just flex all the time



A good friend will bail you out of jail, but your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying 'That was fucking awesome!'
Apr 9 2002 6:38PM
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Freestyla_01
Posts: 8586 - Karma: 34
how far away from the toilet are you people standing? god damn...
or maybe looking where youre going might help.
---
How many boots could three Phils fill if three Phils could fill boots?
Apr 9 2002 6:43PM
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sirjibsalot
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 19
yeah i use the shower sometimes when im extra lazy.
Today i was trying really hard to take a non-splash pee and the i was doing rad until the end where i flexed the muscle down there and it came out at such vilocity that some toleit water splashed onto my fuckingpants....it sucked
--To Be A Jibber You've Got To Be So Fresh, To Have Style And Finesse Way Above The Rest--
--Martin Snaps Is A Fag--just kidding--or am i?
Apr 9 2002 6:53PM
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nipe
Posts: 2586 - Karma: 6
HAHAHHA! maybe look where ur going..HAHA brilliant!!!!
yea i think i might try opening my eyes next time..lol


*leader of the skiing with your pants down revolution*
Apr 9 2002 7:36PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
HAHA!
one time i rolled into the bathroom on the rolling chairs with the wheels and then i got up and did the piss right. not wrong like you guys hahaha. my penis isn't all screwed up, ahahaah
it's alright they have facilities for you kind of poeple. hahah just joking boys

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 9 2002 7:49PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
HAHA!
one time i rolled into the bathroom on the rolling chairs with the wheels and then i got up and did the piss right. not wrong like you guys hahaha. my penis isn't all screwed up, ahahaah
it's alright they have facilities for you kind of poeple. hahah just joking boys

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 9 2002 7:49PM
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Gdawg3
Posts: 1956 - Karma: 10
Peeing on racer kids, interesting......

What if I just let loose on the chairlift, and skipped the whole condom thing?


'Victory? We're French, we don't even have a word for it.'
Apr 9 2002 8:44PM
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Stinkyprimo
Posts: 976 - Karma: 10
That condom trick was from a movie.. some ski hilli think it was called.. oh well it was freakin stupid... kinda funny when it broke on the guy's head but retarded after that

Look at the abuse I put up with from everybody... I think I need a hug.

Matt Enns: 'Take that f**king helmet off and don't wear it ever again!'
Shaun Maclean: 'Purple skis... haha!'
Jeff Thomas: 'Shutup ya little freak, I'm gonna rape you more than you'd want to screw Britney Spears. WTF did you do to my truck???'
Apr 9 2002 8:49PM
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Diabhal
Posts: 1003 - Karma: 10
It's the worst when you really have to takea leak and that firs blast is uncontrolable. I hate that.
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Apr 9 2002 9:01PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
aaaahaha yea! I hate it

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 9 2002 9:12PM
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Freestyla_01
Posts: 8586 - Karma: 34
one of the greatest feelings is, after holding a piss for a looooong time, then just letting it go after.
the wait is one of the worst feelings though.
---
How many boots could three Phils fill if three Phils could fill boots?
Apr 9 2002 9:44PM
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tremblantripper
Posts: 1501 - Karma: 18
and why the hell doesnt dancing help when you have to go but you cant, you only grab your dick and start jumpin around but it works real good



A good friend will bail you out of jail, but your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying 'That was fucking awesome!'
Apr 9 2002 10:21PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
does for me in class!

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 10 2002 3:42PM
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sirjibsalot
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 19
yeah the first blast launches like a Space shuttle
--To Be A Jibber You've Got To Be So Fresh, To Have Style And Finesse Way Above The Rest--
--Martin Snaps Is A Fag--just kidding--or am i?
Apr 10 2002 6:44PM
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JShBattier31
Posts: 255 - Karma: 15
Yea, I heard that if you masterbate using one hand it tends to bend in that direction, (I swear, and hey it comes from a reliable source), so you have to alternate hands, and try to keep the same, flow goin on. Oh yea, i'm talking about the dudes, the chicks have it easy =D
~juliet~
Apr 10 2002 7:52PM
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tremblantripper
Posts: 1501 - Karma: 18
heheheh i read something that jackin off causes blindness over a gradual period of time, but youd have to jack off like 3 times every day



A good friend will bail you out of jail, but your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying 'That was fucking awesome!'
Apr 10 2002 8:41PM
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Diabhal
Posts: 1003 - Karma: 10
Ah. no wonder i'm colour blind


Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Apr 10 2002 8:43PM
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Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
Well with my wrecked thumb on my right hand, looks like I'll need to learn to bat left handed!
________________________________
FUCK THA POLICE!
Apr 10 2002 8:44PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
My left hand doesnt do the job right. ahaha

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 10 2002 9:05PM
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rebel
Posts: 5198 - Karma: 22
How the hell can jerking off make you blind???? That's about as true as 'your dead relatives are watching you everytime you maturbate.' They are stupid MYTHS that people made up way back in the day to try to stop people from masturbating.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

'That's my cancer wishing face' - yellowsnow4U wishing cancer upon the server that kept us away from NS
Apr 10 2002 9:59PM
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jono
Posts: 1744 - Karma: 22
try it with your left hand- although it is very tireing, it feels like someone else is doing it, i swear
and he flew round the world on a never ending dinnerroll...
Apr 10 2002 11:13PM
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ickyy
Posts: 206 - Karma: 10
Once you've done it for a while it's so easy to go switch stance. Just like skiing.





Nobodys Perfect..............I'm Nobody
Apr 10 2002 11:19PM
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Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
Hahaha Jone, So true dude!
_____________________________________
Good friends tell you about the time they nailed that broad....BEST friends reach over, tag your hand, and say 'YOUR TURN'
Apr 10 2002 11:27PM
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etom
Posts: 2443 - Karma: 13
at whistler my friend had to piss and we were on the quad going down blackcomb mountian. we were the only ones on the char and no one was infront of us, and some old people were behind us so i just went to the corner and looked away and he went off the side. it was funny cus as soon as he started going we went under the gondola. it was helarouse.
maybe
Apr 11 2002 12:03AM
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sirjibsalot
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 19
IM gunna piss off the seat before the seson ends for sure....its gunna be rad....ill problably get it all over the seat though...
--To Be A Jibber You've Got To Be So Fresh, To Have Style And Finesse Way Above The Rest--
--Martin Snaps Is A Fag--just kidding--or am i?
Apr 11 2002 12:30AM
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skiordie
Posts: 807 - Karma: 11
hey... just commit to it. confidence is the key here. fear IS the mind killer!

hehehe


Fear is the mind killer!
Apr 11 2002 12:35AM
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TAK
Posts: 5007 - Karma: 14
Hmmm, pissing out of the goddy would be fun. Right on to the Wizard chair. haha, stoopid ski school! Take that!
-Gabe Lumintn

What this week's anagram?
Apr 11 2002 11:25AM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
AHAHAH damn racing kids!

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 11 2002 4:57PM
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sirjibsalot
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 19
what dose racing have to do anything?

--To Be A Jibber You've Got To Be So Fresh, To Have Style And Finesse Way Above The Rest--
--Martin Snaps Is A Fag--just kidding--or am i?
Apr 11 2002 7:29PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
the dumb little racing kids that invade the park and cut you off.

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 11 2002 8:03PM
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under_achieved
Posts: 1164 - Karma: 14
how about when your in a public washroom and you try to put some push behind your piss when all of a sudden you ripp a huge fart and everyone in there starts laughing, and you start laughing too and your aim gets way off. you know what I'm talking about.



Cravin Moorhead
Apr 11 2002 8:37PM
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tremblantripper
Posts: 1501 - Karma: 18
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, funny shit!



A good friend will bail you out of jail, but your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying 'That was fucking awesome!'
Apr 11 2002 9:29PM
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PhattSarah
Posts: 602 - Karma: 11
If you guys are having such a hard time aiming your stream, why not put some ping-pong balls in the toilet bowl? Thats sometimes what they do when the toilet train little kids, and it sounds like some of you need some help!
~ Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire ~
* Matty is a Dairy Queen *
Apr 11 2002 10:06PM
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Tele-Jibber
Posts: 2278 - Karma: 12
Oh would that help at all? You would just end up with a buch of piss soaked ping pong balls...


Taylor
Tele-Jibber
~ Phunkin' Phatt Phreerider ~
Apr 11 2002 10:09PM
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yellowsnow4u
Posts: 3283 - Karma: 15
Tay you are assuming way too much.....apparently no one here has the aim to even get it in hte toilet....hahahaa
Matt

***Founder of the Dancing Penguin Revolution :)***
'hey, your skis go both ways. Wait, you have bi-sexual skis!' - Said to Matt Harvey by a 50 year old ski instructor
~~Phunkin' Phatt Phreerider~~
Apr 11 2002 10:44PM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
AHAAHAH that's some funny ass shit

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 11 2002 10:58PM
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Freestyla_01
Posts: 8586 - Karma: 34
wouldnt the piss just deflect off the balls, and spill more around the toilet than before?
---
How many boots could three Phils fill if three Phils could fill boots?

In a few years, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Apr 11 2002 11:12PM
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Freestyla_01
Posts: 8586 - Karma: 34
and get like on your knees and shins and your pants.... ewww.
---
How many boots could three Phils fill if three Phils could fill boots?

In a few years, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Apr 11 2002 11:12PM
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PhattSarah
Posts: 602 - Karma: 11
You're not actually supposed to hit the balls, just try and get your pee near them, which is hopefully somewhere in the vicinity of the toilet bowl.
~ Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire ~
* Matty is a Dairy Queen *
Apr 12 2002 12:45AM
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tremblantripper
Posts: 1501 - Karma: 18
but what happens if theyre off to the side, you just end up back were you started, with crappy aim and piss all over the place



A good friend will bail you out of jail, but your best friend will be the one sitting next to you saying 'That was fucking awesome!'
Apr 12 2002 9:09AM
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grehtnorth
Posts: 218 - Karma: 25
I can't deal with the backsplash when I'm pissing in a urinal, so I go to the toilet. But then I get those little drops that are just hangin on to daddy, and when I say enough's enough and get those annoying leakers off, they jump right on to my pants. I'm trying to be nice, but they don't get it. Also, does anyone else's crimson crowbar not drain properly? You think it's all gone, so you put on your pants, and it decides to visit again. I could stand at the toilet for like ten minutes, and about every 5 seconds, another squirt. frick, I just want to be satisfied. stupid pee
Apr 12 2002 10:26AM
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MART-IZZLE
Posts: 3429 - Karma: 13
ahaha. I think its alot worse for girls, because we can piss against trees while girl cant just stand there and piss.

DAMN DANISHES ARE GOOD!!ehh jon?

Joel I hate you!!
pissing me off by saying fag just joking.hahahaha

hahahaha remember this Jordan?? 'if anybody who lives in the west would like to adopt me please contact me asap' you are simply the coolest!
Apr 12 2002 3:49PM
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Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
Ya, ping pong balls are bad news. I used to use Cheerio's. And if I could hit them, then I would give myself a Smarty.
mmmmmmmm Smarties!
_____________________________________
Good friends tell you about the time they nailed that broad....BEST friends reach over, tag your hand, and say 'YOUR TURN'
Apr 12 2002 4:07PM
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1080enemy
Posts: 2171 - Karma: 13
did u wash your hands before u gave yourself the smartie?
Life is good!
Apr 12 2002 4:15PM
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Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
Naw, just licked 'em clean!
_____________________________________
Good friends tell you about the time they nailed that broad....BEST friends reach over, tag your hand, and say 'YOUR TURN'
Apr 12 2002 4:36PM
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SkierX
Posts: 16253 - Karma: 538
HAAHA! YAH! DUE! HAHA! Being a girl would suck. Sure you could pull off the woods piss. But you'd ahve to squat it out. Not cool.

(This is quite possibly the funniest thread ever on NS)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
~~~~Phunkin' Phatt Phreerider~~~~
~'BigAirSkier1580: and i am a newschool skier
DatGrlyChick: skier??
BigAirSkier1580: yah
DatGrlyChick: whats that?'
**Love ya Lacey**
Apr 12 2002 4:59PM
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Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
this is post 100 in this thread!!! YEAH!
_____________________________________
Good friends tell you about the time they nailed that broad....BEST friends reach over, tag your hand, and say 'YOUR TURN'
Apr 12 2002 6:15PM
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castlerock
Posts: 1096 - Karma: 11
hahahahahaha, this post is fucking ridiculous hahaha

~Chris

You know something that would really make me applaud? A guy gets stuck in quicksand, then sinks, then suddenly comes shooting out, riding on water skis. How do they do that?
Apr 12 2002 9:06PM
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