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October, 2024

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Best one line insults

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tuna.
Posts: 2627 - Karma: 111
 i find that a short and simple response to idiocracy does the trick.

during school last year the girl sitting next to me obviously woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

coincidentally, i said, what did you have for breakfast, carnation instant bitch?

it worked, she shut up.

what are your best insults
Aug 7 2008 2:35PM
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iluvBread
Posts: 1519 - Karma: 38
fuck off...idk i usually just ignore ppl. if they're being annoying or talkin shit....just fuckin wakl away
Aug 7 2008 2:36PM
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tuna.
Posts: 2627 - Karma: 111
i.dont.love.bread.

you hurt my feelings
Aug 7 2008 2:43PM
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reverendwrong
Posts: 3145 - Karma: 142
i use my knowledge of ppl (small ass school) to attack them on a subject most dear to them...for example....

this one kid who is a total douche is a patriots fan.....well more than fan he would suck tom brady's dick if he got the chance. So whenever hes being a tool i just attack him on that. heres a few instances...his name is nick by the way...

nick: hell yeah 93%

me: hey Mr.D go check nicks paper i think he cheated

Mr.D: ok ryan whats your basis for that calim

me: hes a patriots fan, nuff said

Mr.D: laughs, walks over and takes and grabs nicks paper.

nick: hey whoa i didnt cheat i studied for this test

Mr.D: like how the patriots "studied" the other teams defense?

whole class dies laughing


i also just respond 17-1 everytime he gets annoying, that usually shuts him up
Aug 7 2008 2:48PM
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heFF
Posts: 5786 - Karma: 4,456
just gotta be sarcastic
Aug 7 2008 2:56PM
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SteevJee
Posts: 1916 - Karma: 144
Ill just mumble something unintelligible so it leaves them wondering what i said.
Aug 7 2008 3:15PM
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Malcolm
Posts: 15951 - Karma: 9,451
yea me too. but its just because i suck at comebacks
Aug 7 2008 3:26PM
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iluvBread
Posts: 1519 - Karma: 38
how the fuck did i hurt your feelings? i didn't even say ne thing to ya
Aug 7 2008 3:27PM
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KellyK
Posts: 1782 - Karma: 715
ya, you completely stole the "carnation instant bitch" line from "That 70's Show".  Do not claim credit for that.  I'm sorry, but ur not that clever.
Aug 7 2008 3:36PM
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KellyK
Posts: 1782 - Karma: 715
and idiocracy doesn't mean what you think it does

you mean idiocy

i bet i sound like a complete asshole, but i'm in a bad mood


Aug 7 2008 3:38PM
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MatRich
Posts: 4789 - Karma: 1,813
you cock wrangling ass monger!
Aug 7 2008 3:48PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
i just go for the personal attacks that leave them devastated. like this girl who was anorexic for a summer, started talking shit on me. just a short but sweet, so do you enjoy sticking your arm down your throat? that shit works wonders.
Aug 7 2008 3:55PM
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Gnarshred
Posts: 5670 - Karma: 18
^I dont get it... why would she do that if she was aneorexic?
Aug 7 2008 4:40PM
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Mike34113
Posts: 1088 - Karma: 112
your mom
Aug 7 2008 4:43PM
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hart62
Posts: 352 - Karma: 10
my two favorites are shit-faced cock master and donkey raping shit eater.
Aug 7 2008 4:57PM
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artfullydodged
Posts: 8358 - Karma: 1,674
looks like you just got back from a cock rodeo
Aug 7 2008 5:02PM
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VT_FLO
Posts: 3806 - Karma: 147
i usually just beat kids up that are smaller then me.

IS he kidding? he must be! or is he?

the world may never know.

just like the location of Carmen Sandiego
Aug 7 2008 7:01PM
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NaturalRotater
Posts: 433 - Karma: 36
"i'm rubber your glue what you say bounces off me and sticks to you"
"Your a Phone Jack"
Aug 7 2008 8:15PM
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Lemuel
Posts: 14486 - Karma: 10,635
jogg on

from hot fuzz
Aug 7 2008 8:17PM
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DangerToes
Posts: 1042 - Karma: 33
i hate... I HATE CHRISTMAS

theres really no rebuttal for it
Aug 7 2008 8:39PM
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bradcoffey
Posts: 582 - Karma: 31
eat my shit -usually works
Aug 7 2008 8:42PM
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Shpadoinkle
Posts: 10437 - Karma: 84
Oh my God! That's the coolest fucking story I've ever heard! Can I hear it again? Do you have time?
Aug 7 2008 8:44PM
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Celone
Posts: 1998 - Karma: 114
i tell them i peed in their butts
Aug 7 2008 8:45PM
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ECGove
Posts: 1947 - Karma: 75
it was 18-1, get your facts straight you jive turkey
Aug 7 2008 10:01PM
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MatRich
Posts: 4789 - Karma: 1,813
oh did you realy call him a jive turkey!!
no he called you a cock sucker
yah a cock sucker
thats right you cock sucker!
Aug 7 2008 10:23PM
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fourhundred
Posts: 2760 - Karma: 21
haha nice
Aug 7 2008 10:31PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
i use that one on this kid richtard that no one likes

and because of me a NS he is also known as hansel
Aug 7 2008 10:32PM
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KarmaSkiier
Posts: 461 - Karma: 6
i know you are but what am i? ohhhh shit!
Aug 7 2008 10:34PM
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Campeador
Posts: 7516 - Karma: -1,227
stolen from immortal technique but it works beatifully

I was at this party and I was talking to my friend, this girl dana is drunk as fuck
me: yea dude, dana is a fucking slut, you should get some (didn't realize she heard me)
dana: what the fuck did you say!!! i'll break this bottle on your head!
me: calm down bitch, if you can take a dick you can take a fucking joke

a bunch of people burst out laughing and she just said "fuck you!" and walked off.


Aug 7 2008 10:37PM
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Ahmets_Brother
Posts: 20283 - Karma: 5,931
usually if people are insecure or about that ripe age of 15, adding faggot to the end after about 2-3 seconds after saying something sarcastic can work wonders...


Aug 8 2008 12:26AM
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KarmaSkiier
Posts: 461 - Karma: 6
epic.
Aug 8 2008 7:33PM
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g.muelheims
Posts: 457 - Karma: 110
hah thats so freaking good
Aug 8 2008 7:57PM
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Alex_G
Posts: 11902 - Karma: 1,019
Just call somebody a child molester. (Driveby insults)
Aug 8 2008 8:21PM
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oiECSoi
Posts: 1447 - Karma: 10
usualy just think of something off the top of my head. "Nice jacket ya ball tickling dundee" or something so stupid or imature they just dont know how to respond 
Aug 8 2008 8:36PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
well idk bulimic it might be? the one where they make themselves puke. whichever that is.
Aug 8 2008 8:45PM
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shrEddie
Posts: 5117 - Karma: 65
haha i have a friend who says that alot.  he gets me with it usually
Aug 8 2008 8:58PM
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Malcolm
Posts: 15951 - Karma: 9,451
you my friend, are not my friend
Aug 9 2008 1:42PM
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charmander
Posts: 10636 - Karma: 370
cross country coach: your not running fast enough
me: your old and confused.

it was sweet haha hes just like patcheso hulahan from dodgeball, but with only one arm and likes to wear short shorts.
Aug 9 2008 1:53PM
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goonsquad
Posts: 550 - Karma: 224
she can read minds?
Aug 9 2008 1:56PM
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oiECSoi
Posts: 1447 - Karma: 10

cool story hansel

Aug 9 2008 4:16PM
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smuggsVT
Posts: 2145 - Karma: 19
your mom should have swallowed you
Aug 9 2008 4:22PM
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AntifreezeSteeze
Posts: 1643 - Karma: 53
suck on my dick...sometimes they completely change their attitudes and are like OMG really?!?! ahaha
Aug 9 2008 6:44PM
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