Member of the Month

KilaTsunami
October, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

I have a game for you guys to play

profile picture
TheButterHashira
Posts: 9691 - Karma: 1,702

Go to http://http://www.landoverbaptist.net/ , make an account and see how long you can last without getting banned. I have made 2 accounts and my second one was perma banned after about 1 minute and one post.

May 14 2008 8:22PM
0 0
profile picture
eheath
Posts: 61590 - Karma: 122,942
i opened that and just looked at all the titles and just thought about this:

Click for larger image
May 16 2008 2:08AM
0 0
profile picture
Eric_D
Posts: 1562 - Karma: 79
i posted one question on this site. see if u can find it.
May 16 2008 3:05AM
0 0
profile picture
*freeskierpj*
Posts: 1400 - Karma: 13
http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=11630 read it...they spelt gateway wrong by the way hahahaha...
May 16 2008 8:55AM
0 0
profile picture
ShredtillURdead
Posts: 2024 - Karma: 93
^^ skipatrolblewitup aaaahahahahahahaa amazing, im going right meow...
May 16 2008 9:10AM
0 0
profile picture
Julien.
Posts: 686 - Karma: 59
they dog on  skiing in the landover baptisit one:

Skiing, gate way to sodomy
Brethren,

As you have all been long aware Landover Baptist, Jesus favorite Church, as prohibited it's members from skiing under threat of instant expulsion from our TRUE Christian™ community. That is because skiing directly leads to rampaging homosexuality. The tight spandex and wool combined with blatantly phallic poles and skies drives the skier into a sodomistic rampage from which no man is safe.

Just look at the decadent skiing hell holes like Colorado Springs, no place fit for a decent Christian. We have all seen Pastor Zeke’s extensive report on them. Skiers are gay, each and every one of them without exception.

Jesus hates skiers and so should you.




hahah
May 16 2008 4:36PM
0 0
profile picture
CrazedSkier1080
Posts: 3357 - Karma: 66
my name is P331NH3RBU77 we'll see how long i last. I wonder if jesus freaks know leet.
May 16 2008 4:46PM
0 0
profile picture
Piste.Off
Posts: 11586 - Karma: 1,860
my name is brother casey on the site. and i just rick roll'd them.
we'll see what happens.
May 17 2008 2:10AM
0 0
profile picture
2+2=5
Posts: 3676 - Karma: 18
hahah theres porn in there now
May 17 2008 8:01AM
0 0
profile picture
kzrstf
Posts: 2778 - Karma: 695
I have a confession to make to you guys. I was once a skier. A very gay, very high freestyle skier. One day after a binge of sodomy and reefer I stumbled into a church by accident. The preacher talked to me and later I realized I wasn't living my life right. I took my skis and built a fire with them and burned all my freeskier magazines and harry potter books. I got rid of all my ski clothes and bought some landover baptist t shirts to wear. I then started voting republican. The Lord has really changed my life. I hope that if you guys can accept me then maybe Jesus can too.

Who posted this!
HAHA!
+karma 4 u
May 17 2008 9:31AM
0 0
profile picture
TheButterHashira
Posts: 9691 - Karma: 1,702
Dude I am not lying that was me. Huckabee2012. I made another thread in the introduction section.
May 17 2008 7:23PM
0 0
profile picture
parkdizzle
Posts: 103 - Karma: 10
haha i was banned after one post reason for ban- "Wah wah wah. Try a manly sport someday that doesn't require swishing and maybe you won't be a whiny little queer." lets keep this going
May 17 2008 9:40PM
0 0
profile picture
Twinjibber77
Posts: 6239 - Karma: 2,354
hahahahah i love this
new thread topic on there is ......."skiing is the gateway to sodomy"
May 17 2008 9:44PM
0 0
profile picture
Twinjibber77
Posts: 6239 - Karma: 2,354
"My GOD, I SO wasn't in here peeking at this 'Godly Member' thread! I SO didn't see anything!"

+karma to who ever posted that!!!!
May 17 2008 10:02PM
0 0
profile picture
Dr.Scholl
Posts: 1139 - Karma: 47
they dont allow the word fucking
im pissed
May 17 2008 10:39PM
0 0
profile picture
Parker.
Posts: 1637 - Karma: 108
i've got you covered
May 17 2008 10:41PM
0 0
profile picture
Dr.Scholl
Posts: 1139 - Karma: 47

You have been banned for the following reason:
Ski homo

Date the ban will be lifted: Never


shitty
i only lasted 3 min

May 17 2008 10:43PM
0 0
profile picture
Parker.
Posts: 1637 - Karma: 108

You have been banned for the following reason:
ski troll

Date the ban will be lifted: Never


i guess it knew i was one of those hot dogging freestyle skier punks.  i tried to create a thread about how much that site sucked and it pushed the 'fuck you' button

May 17 2008 10:53PM
0 0
profile picture
Campeador
Posts: 7516 - Karma: -1,227
I hope you all know thats its fake. Its a fictional church made to make fun of fundamentalist Christians like the westborough baptist church.
May 17 2008 11:00PM
0 0
profile picture
Crack.
Posts: 6020 - Karma: 84

You have been banned for the following reason:
Ski troll

Date the ban will be lifted: Never


and i don't know how to make a new thing i deleted my cookies and all but it doesn;t work

May 17 2008 11:00PM
0 0
profile picture
Campeador
Posts: 7516 - Karma: -1,227
IT'S FAKE


May 17 2008 11:10PM
0 0
profile picture
TheButterHashira
Posts: 9691 - Karma: 1,702
WE KNOW
May 17 2008 11:11PM
0 0
profile picture
pompom
Posts: 15 - Karma: 10
username: inthebutt
instantly banned.

they shouldnt be talking to people online.. they could be raped... INTHEBUTT, raped in the butt!
May 17 2008 11:29PM
0 0
profile picture
scientist
Posts: 6920 - Karma: 348
She seems like an absolute godess. My friends say that I look like a "chic christ" (according to artist renderings of course, lol). I am a fan of women with short hair, and a penis measuring anywhere from 5 to 9 inches. If she fits this criteria I have a lifesize nativity scene in my bedroom ready to get destroyed in the name of the lord with our wedding night shinanigans sure to make her nut her load all over my eyes. I will always refer to my favorite psalm (39) "chicks with dicks light my holy fiyah." lol. see yall on the upper deck!
May 17 2008 11:30PM
0 0
profile picture
ThaLetterM.
Posts: 8609 - Karma: 1,613
my name is stayfresh on that forum..i made a thread...
May 17 2008 11:36PM
0 0
profile picture
TheMoostafian
Posts: 4504 - Karma: 9,438
haha i posted a thread in the meet christian singles forum about selling my wife

see if you can find it

haha heres what i got banned for


You have been banned for the following reason:
filthy Muslim scum

Date the ban will be lifted: Never
May 17 2008 11:36PM
0 0
profile picture
ThaLetterM.
Posts: 8609 - Karma: 1,613

You have been banned for the following reason:
troll scum

Date the ban will be lifted: Never


dammnit

May 17 2008 11:36PM
0 0
profile picture
vinnyT
Posts: 349 - Karma: 10
I made one response
somebody said "Jesus didn't ski, so I certainly won't"
and i replied that Jesus didn't use electricity or a computer  either
and in two minutes i got this

You have been banned for the following reason:
ski queer

Date the ban will be lifted: Never


May 17 2008 11:40PM
0 0
profile picture
vinnyT
Posts: 349 - Karma: 10
how do u know
i wouldn't be surprised if its real
May 17 2008 11:43PM
0 0
profile picture
vinnyT
Posts: 349 - Karma: 10
scratch that got the poop on this satire
http://www.answers.com/topic/landover-baptist-church
May 17 2008 11:57PM
0 0
profile picture
RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
i got banned for asking what a newscholer is

and my name was Dane_Queed
May 18 2008 12:01AM
0 0
profile picture
SteezeJunky
Posts: 16 - Karma: 10
i was supprised i didnt get instantly banned, my name was futtbuckers. but he,y, i lasted for like 10 minutes. just posting random crap all around
May 18 2008 11:11AM
0 0
profile picture
skiEER
Posts: 4089 - Karma: 79
that thread is so funny
May 18 2008 3:18PM
0 0
profile picture
Pirruccio
Posts: 1301 - Karma: 70
Originally Posted by Uncle Goose View Post
Why shouldn't women enjoy sex with their husband/friend??
You filthy little pervert sicko! Please tell me where in the Bible it teaches that a woman should have sex with her husband AND HIS FRIENDS!

I'm guessing you're one of these bi-sexural queer pervert swinger pieces of s - h - i - t. Raping a married woman, while her sick deviant husband watches. Or does he join in, and sodomise you, then piss on you, while you impregnate his trailer-trash wife with your dumb little negroid kids?

How DARE you come onto a Christian forum, and spew your disease here! You people are human-trash! Garbage people we call you, and I can assure you that's what you are! / message controls Reply With Quote
May 18 2008 9:22PM
0 0
profile picture
Pirruccio
Posts: 1301 - Karma: 70
I'm guessing you're one of these bi-sexural queer pervert swinger
pieces of s - h - i - t. Raping a married woman, while her sick deviant
husband watches. Or does he join in, and sodomise you, then piss on
you



hahahahahahahahahahahahaa
May 18 2008 9:23PM
0 0
profile picture
scottvail
Posts: 138 - Karma: 110
haha
funny
Oct 8 2008 9:19PM
0 0
profile picture
k-rob
Posts: 14217 - Karma: 2,891
just made an account, and thread titled "Help Please"
feel free to contribute.
Oct 8 2008 9:54PM
0 0
profile picture
TZA.
Posts: 1462 - Karma: 181
i laughed soo fucking hard when i looked at that
Oct 8 2008 11:08PM
0 0
profile picture
kingcomet32
Posts: 638 - Karma: 13
Im going to town, ive got like 3 or 4 rather vulgar posts, 1 containing rick roll
Oct 9 2008 2:01AM
0 0
profile picture
k-rob
Posts: 14217 - Karma: 2,891
bahahaha, not banned yet, but i've lost 2500 points and they changed my username to "negro baby rapist"
Oct 9 2008 1:20PM
0 0
profile picture
Hannah.
Posts: 4625 - Karma: 56
hahhaha
Oct 9 2008 1:48PM
0 0
profile picture
no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
haha i just saw you online. jesus those people are fucked up
Oct 9 2008 1:55PM
0 0
profile picture
gmack24
Posts: 4636 - Karma: 31
FagzRule [IMG]landoverbaptist.net/images/statusicon/user_online.gif[/IMG] vbmenu_register("postmenu_247634", true);
Unsaved Trash
Under Investigation
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 1
[IMG]landoverbaptist.net/images/reputation/reputation_pos.gif[/IMG]
/ user info message, attachments, sig icon and title
[IMG]landoverbaptist.net/images/icons/icon1.gif[/IMG] omg
/ icon and title message
Why do you guyz hate homosexuals when Jesus admits in the bible to being gay with his disciples....?
Oct 9 2008 2:31PM
0 0
profile picture
k-rob
Posts: 14217 - Karma: 2,891
vBulletin Message main error message

You have been banned for the following reason:
Perverted Negro

Date the ban will be lifted: Never

Oct 9 2008 2:48PM
0 0
profile picture
KidBroSweets
Posts: 98 - Karma: -41
Hopefully they dont do this back to us and ruin NS!!!!!!!
Oct 9 2008 2:51PM
0 0
profile picture
chicken.
Posts: 289 - Karma: 587
name: Anton LaVay





Title: Interpretation of biblical passage

Body: this is the ending passage of the first book of the satanic bible [IMG]landoverbaptist.net/images/smilies/devil.gif[/IMG]

Death to the weakling, wealth to the strong". This statement is another reflection of real life which is represented by Satan. This philosophy is not about right or wrong, moral or immoral; it is about reality. And in reality, the weak die and the strong gain. Many people are too weak or unfortunate to survive birth, some commit suicide, etc; these are the "weak". The "strong" are those who take control of their own lives. Satan proclaims "death to the weakling" not because it is right but because that's the way reality and nature works. Some people do choose to infer that this means "might is right" is right.[IMG]landoverbaptist.net/images/smilies/jesus%20smilie.gif[/IMG]

does that mean i win??



for some reason they havent banned it yet
Oct 9 2008 3:43PM
0 0
profile picture
scottvail
Posts: 138 - Karma: 110
hahaha
Oct 9 2008 3:46PM
0 0
profile picture
sethski
Posts: 331 - Karma: 10
Church Statistics

"Threads: 11,752, Posts: 234,474, Members: 6,210, Active Members: 676
Welcome to our newest member, NSsatanfork6i6d6s!"


hahahahaha

Oct 9 2008 5:11PM
0 0
profile picture
sethski
Posts: 331 - Karma: 10
have any of you noticed how they sensor "fuck" with "piffle"? haha, so much fun.
Oct 9 2008 5:27PM
0 0
profile picture
scottvail
Posts: 138 - Karma: 110
bump
Oct 10 2008 4:21PM
0 0
profile picture
zacharyn
Posts: 552 - Karma: 5
Frick, I'm going over 5 mins now.
Oct 10 2008 4:48PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)