I am in need of guidance from multiple 13/14 year olds. The few people 18+ that actually know about this stuff, it would be greatly appreciated if you gave your two cents.
My story:
I am failing out of university. My parents are both engineers and we are upper middle class I would say, no debt, and a big house with a nice cabin at a ski town in B.C. Obviously my dad thinks I would make a great engineer, and he is probably right, but I have no interest in the field, as broad as it is. I went to college this year with the expectation of making new friends, having alot of sex with easy college girls, enjoying the program I was in, being able to get drunk whenever without hassle from my parents, do what I want, gamble online when I want, go to bed when I want, do homework when I want, and do what I want.
It met all of my expectations, although the sex can be messy due to the very nature of the college attitude. I was expecting to be able to easily sit down and focus because I knew a glamorous career in a cubicle making a starting salary awaited, and then I realized, how is that worth it at all? Why do I want to work? Then life's questions hit me like a ton of bricks, and school went by the wayside while I just relaxed partied, skipped most of my classes, got high, and everything but focusing on school. I still wrote my tests, did my assignments, but put a really half ass job into everything. I also spent all my money and had to borrow $1500+ from parents/credit cards for second semester.
Here I sit faced with life ahead of me, yet I am still an immature fuck, and am smart enough to realize I am not ready to set out on the adventure that we call life. I don't want to work and then just be old and retired and die. I want to make a difference, have a legacy, bring change to this fucked up society and earth. Then I think, it's all going to be for naught, the sun will implode eventually and life on earth with cease to exist, actually it will cease to exist long before the sun implodes likely from global freezing, or a collision with something or god know what. So the point of making a legacy and bringing about change seems pointless. Perhaps I will live pay check to paycheck in a small mountain town and live where I love doing what I love all the time. That seems the most logical.
Then their is the issue of me wanting to have a wife and kids, so then I look back at taking a year off from school and living just to work and ski, and then going to a different university after that and finishing my business degree and starting that glamorous cooperate career I mentioned previously. In this instance however, I will be two years behind, and for four years I will be away from the most amazing friends I have ever been given the opportunity to know. I don't know If I could deal with that. I know I would make new friends at the new university, but it just wouldn't seem right, or maybe I would meet the love of my life and all the dots would connect as they say they will.
Each day I look around me and I am in awe at how truly amazing everything is. Technology, life, love, family, nature, time, the universe, friends, food, our brain and it's abilities. It truly is amazing, and sadly in a hundred years, 99.999% of everyone alive today will be dead. I just don't know.
I just don't know.
