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The best gaper quotes

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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
somebody on the chairlift yesterday asked me what they did with the moguls at the end of the year?
i also gotten "what altitude do the dear turn to elk?"
Mar 10 2008 7:33PM
2709 528
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Lemuel
Posts: 14490 - Karma: 10,630
"Sell your Cross jacket"
Jan 19 2012 7:22PM
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*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15081 - Karma: 9,158
to me.
Jan 19 2012 7:33PM
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84891jnf92048
Posts: 11552 - Karma: 2,550
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Jan 19 2012 8:31PM
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p-nutt
Posts: 274 - Karma: 16
my friend works at a shop and some kid came up to him with a powder ski, he asked

"why do you sell snowboards in packs of two?"
Jan 19 2012 11:53PM
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rareison
Posts: 10263 - Karma: 219
Not really a gaper, but a dumbass snowboarder kid that is really fuckin stupid and knows NOTHING about freeskiing

1. Him: "You know that Sarah chick that died?"

Me: "Yeah, it's pretty sad. She died from a heart attack after hitting her head and not getting enough oxygen to her brain."

Him: "No she didn't, she tried trying a triple cork"

Fuck I wanted to punch him out. And he is fucking 17 years old.

2. "I really wanna go to Park City, every run is a park."

Me: "No, every run isn't a park."

Him: "Yeah they are, that's why it's called Park City"


3. Him: "My skier friend had a pair of Line bindings that were meant for freestyle because they were really tight, and they only went up half notches so you hardly had to tighten them to do butters and stuff."

I facepalmed.
Jan 21 2012 8:45PM
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Gods_Father
Posts: 1466 - Karma: -284
Standing beside 2 people in lift line about to get on the chair

Girl: what is that guy wearing?(points to me)

Guy: that is a ski helmet.

Girl: where do you get them?

Guy: you can get them for about $80.

Then I look around the lift and almost everybody is wearing a helmet...
Jan 22 2012 12:14PM
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roddy116
Posts: 10630 - Karma: 7,456
gaper: how do u get in to the halfpipe
me: uhh you can either drop in or just go to the front
gaper: oh, i want to drop in
me: just find a bit of a rivet then just jump in.
gaper: WHAT!! you can do that
me: yah
gaper: im just gonna slide down on my but
me: alright bro then i drop in

Jan 22 2012 1:13PM
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GrabsForFun
Posts: 1378 - Karma: 396
Threads
Jan 22 2012 1:25PM
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Uncle.tito
Posts: 192 - Karma: 139
how can it be sunny out when it snows
Jan 22 2012 7:49PM
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PaleCelery
Posts: 7228 - Karma: 609
Bump
Jan 25 2012 7:02PM
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vinny0
Posts: 45 - Karma: 53
Me: Have you ever even hit a jump.
Gaper: Yeh I go to hit a rail then i decide not to and go off the side of the jump.
Me: Facepalm
Feb 3 2012 9:33AM
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nickppp100
Posts: 35 - Karma: 10
woah! That guy did a backflip!!
Feb 3 2012 9:51AM
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jsitt
Posts: 27 - Karma: 10

gaper dad to his daughter: "honey do a helicopter!" as her and her little brothers roll over the lip multiple times destroying it before the park crew finally fixes it. And the same family was impressed by my snowboarder friend's 180

Feb 3 2012 2:23PM
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james6345789
Posts: 4763 - Karma: 467
omg, this happens to me all the time. do people not know how to spell, or are they just stupid?
Feb 6 2012 10:27PM
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gedney29
Posts: 19 - Karma: 10
about a month ago me and my friends were in the liftline with a go pro. the camera was up further with some of them, and me and my buddy are standing next to this couple. the guy turns to his girlfriend and says "see that thing on that kids pole? that's like an eleven thousand dollar camera?"
I barely held in a laugh
Feb 6 2012 10:42PM
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nine50seven
Posts: 576 - Karma: 686
so today me and my friends set up a lil rail in my town on this hill and this guy was walking on the street and ask me(skier) if i like skiing with one ski(referring to a snowboard or 2 skis. haha
Feb 7 2012 12:29AM
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nine50seven
Posts: 576 - Karma: 686
so today me and my friends set up a lil rail in my town on this hill and this guy was walking on the street and ask me(skier) if i like skiing with one ski(referring to a snowboard or 2 skis. haha
Feb 7 2012 12:29AM
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nine50seven
Posts: 576 - Karma: 686
so today me and my friends set up a lil rail in my town on this hill and this guy was walking on the street and ask me(skier) if i like skiing with one ski(referring to a snowboard or 2 skis. haha
Feb 7 2012 12:29AM
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SpaghettiWizard
Posts: 2825 - Karma: 166
'WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE FUCKING SKIS?!" today in reference to my a bangs, i guess you had to be there
Feb 7 2012 12:43AM
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270on420out
Posts: 7508 - Karma: 51,058
I saw a little jappanese kid walking on the concrete path with his skis on i told him he'd wreck his skis but he kept them on. then the guy who owned the ski rental place cme out and freaked out on the kid then him and the kids dad got in a huge argument over whose right about what
Feb 7 2012 8:11PM
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extravert
Posts: 1112 - Karma: 3,174
today on the lift I got the usual "are those trick skis" and then the guy asked me how to do a jump of a mogul. I told him to just pop like he was jumping without skis. Next he asks me how to land. I can't help but say "gravity"
Feb 7 2012 8:18PM
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roddy116
Posts: 10630 - Karma: 7,456
an old guy comes up and says to me "your pants are backwards" guessing he means im sagging
Feb 7 2012 8:20PM
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thisisastickup
Posts: 597 - Karma: -24
I was joking around about acting thug and shooting people on the lift after stomping tricks. and this guy with his kid next to my friend and I goes "dude, he's only SIX!"

dude, you're the one who barged onto the lift unwelcome with two kids in baggy pants and huge jackets. the fuck did you expect?
Feb 7 2012 9:01PM
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caspie
Posts: 221 - Karma: 7
Friend :pulls a switch 3
Gaper Parents: Omg, he went off backwards, spun and landed backwards!
Me: Smiling, sag my pants a bit, and throw a switch 5.
Gaper: (At bottom of lift) go to my friend and ask how he does it...
Me: While on the lift, ask my friend why they didn't like my trick...

Because a switch 3 is harder than a switch 5, of course...
Feb 7 2012 9:25PM
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BigBadWolf
Posts: 2000 - Karma: 432
Depends how big the jump is haha. Switch 3 over small stuff is easy but over big stuff i cant do them nearly as well as a switch 5
Feb 7 2012 9:43PM
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paprikapringles
Posts: 106 - Karma: 44
group of 40 year old blokes on a cable car in Val disere to each other

 " did you guys have a power wank before you came out? Ive never tried it before but gave it a go to see if it would affect my performance"

they then proceeded to talk about power wanking techniques. 

Oblivious to the fact other people could speak english
Feb 8 2012 4:12PM
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Cahal
Posts: 945 - Karma: 594

gaper: (is sking through park) why are all those kids rewening the benches

gaper friend: i donno

me: those are boxes and if you sit on one il screw you over

Feb 8 2012 4:43PM
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Eleidecker
Posts: 245 - Karma: 119
One time, after jibbing i decided to grab something at subway, but i didn't have any shoes with me. So i just went in with my SPK's and a little girl in line behind me quietly asked her mom, "whats wrong that boys shoes?". Her mom responded with "They're his skateboarding boots, honey". My mind was full of what the fucks?
Feb 8 2012 4:44PM
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Powderhauser
Posts: 546 - Karma: 38
rethreads shits funny
Feb 8 2012 4:53PM
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270on420out
Posts: 7508 - Karma: 51,058
Do any of the chairlifts service the parking lot?
Feb 8 2012 6:09PM
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3000
Posts: 941 - Karma: 249
"are those line armadas? -my brothers friend
Feb 8 2012 6:11PM
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Wolfgang.
Posts: 807 - Karma: 866
When ever I talk about park skiing with anybody at my school, for some demented reason they think I do aerials. So whenever I talk about my summer set-up the conversation usually goes around this:
Them: "So you must practice you acrobatics on this"
Me: "That is exactly what I use it for."
Them: "Wait, so how do you do your maneuvers if theres a long pipe in front of your jump."
Me: " Oh thats to prevent other aerialists from using my ramp."


Feb 8 2012 6:23PM
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J_Christoph
Posts: 2519 - Karma: 8,752
hahahahahahahaha
Feb 8 2012 6:47PM
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ESK
Posts: 408 - Karma: 39
Gaper Mom-Wow these goggles are like wearing sunglasses in the summer. I can actually see what I am doing.
Feb 8 2012 7:51PM
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Tyler-49
Posts: 183 - Karma: -1
Some kid asked me If my saga sticker was from the star wars saga..
Feb 9 2012 11:23PM
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BROSEIDON
Posts: 3702 - Karma: 1,495
haha something similar happened to me last night.

Some girl asked if my jiberish al a mode was a star wars sweatshirt because of the font
Feb 9 2012 11:33PM
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Chute-E
Posts: 162 - Karma: 346

I work front desk at pretty nice hotel and it's an amazing three day storm,

Gaper: Man it's really snowing out there.

Me: I know! should be some good skiing out there.

Gaper: Wait so people actually ski in this weather.

Me: ....Ah yes, actually they do sir.

Gaper: Well, when's it going to be sunny again?

halfpipe=trick ditch

Feb 10 2012 1:01AM
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Senor_Goat
Posts: 214 - Karma: 104
Gaper from the chairlift: BRO DO A BARREL ROLLLL
Feb 10 2012 8:58AM
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nickppp100
Posts: 35 - Karma: 10
i love it when they call backflips gainers
Feb 10 2012 9:23AM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
well really they are but yeah
Feb 10 2012 11:51AM
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snowmosexual
Posts: 1933 - Karma: 10,020
today at school I was talking about skiing, and a kid says he learned how to do a 330 the other day
Feb 10 2012 4:12PM
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BROSEIDON
Posts: 3702 - Karma: 1,495
saw a guy snowboarding in skate shoes today...
Feb 11 2012 6:33PM
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Tall_Paul
Posts: 958 - Karma: 57
racers on the lift next to me: I seriously don't get the point of freeskiing, like all your gear gets ruined in an hour
Feb 11 2012 8:14PM
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roddy116
Posts: 10630 - Karma: 7,456
not really a gaper quote but funny

but today i was skiing at a relatively crowded small hill and some guy comes up to my freind and say, dude tell your sister to unblock me on facebook, theres an awkward silence, and then the guy said oh wrong person super sorry, im not retarded or anything, well maybe a little. made me laugh pretty hard.
Feb 11 2012 11:31PM
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84891jnf92048
Posts: 11552 - Karma: 2,550
I mean, that true... but the point of anything isn't about the gear...
Feb 12 2012 7:09AM
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rareison
Posts: 10263 - Karma: 219
What the fuck why does it already say page 83, this page just started
Feb 12 2012 10:22AM
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BolderPro
Posts: 767 - Karma: 426
Did i land that?
Feb 12 2012 1:09PM
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A.Paul
Posts: 302 - Karma: 250
A kid at my school said his best trick was a " 180 tap 90 "

Feb 12 2012 1:20PM
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Jackburn1
Posts: 5 - Karma: 10
Gaper: why is your sweatshirt so big

Feb 12 2012 2:38PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
That's a pretty legitimate question. I find myself thinking that all the time while riding up the lift with park rats, and I would not consider myself a gaper by any means.
Feb 12 2012 3:03PM
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