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The best gaper quotes

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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
somebody on the chairlift yesterday asked me what they did with the moguls at the end of the year?
i also gotten "what altitude do the dear turn to elk?"
Mar 10 2008 7:33PM
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madchronic
Posts: 460 - Karma: 324

So i was on the chairlift by myself and these two guys from Texas ride with me and i hear this.

Guy 1: *sings some awful tpain song*

While Guy 2: Also listens to some music, and then later the other guy says "wow the powders hard to ski in" and then says," You just have to really lean back" and his dumb friend agrees with him. Trust me I've had way worst gapers ride with me but thats all i can think of.

Feb 6 2011 4:21PM
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Davy.Crockett
Posts: 5373 - Karma: 324
in the park i saw someone throw a rodeo 7 and a nearby gaper told me it was a frontflip.
Feb 6 2011 4:55PM
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will_powder
Posts: 3194 - Karma: 5,445
the illest http://www.ehow.com/video_2366807_ski-rails.html
Feb 6 2011 5:06PM
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Zinky
Posts: 486 - Karma: 42
done like a true champion
Feb 6 2011 9:18PM
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Lavieille
Posts: 814 - Karma: 318
random kid: this park is cool
me: yeah, i love it
random kid: that fence thing looks really hard
me: fence?
random kid: yeah the one right there
me : you mean the rail? (holding back laughter)
random kid: yea that
Feb 6 2011 9:45PM
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[creative]
Posts: 539 - Karma: 128
the backpack added to my laughter
Feb 6 2011 11:56PM
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pr4l
Posts: 348 - Karma: 56
I was eavesdropping over someone at the top of the hill about to drop to hit jumps when 2 old ladies asked the following:

"Is this the terrain park?" (Couldnt believe they asked..)
"Yeah"
"So where do we go if we want to avoid everything?"
"Go down the side I guess"
"Ok thank you"

and they proceeded to go straight down the hill managing to block everyone from hitting the jumps until they turned to go down the jumps landing.
Feb 7 2011 12:06AM
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gnarles.
Posts: 2587 - Karma: 130
talking to my moms second cousin about skiing and he asked if i had double tip skis lols. But after he talked about how he graduated with mark abma haha
Feb 7 2011 12:56AM
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alztar
Posts: 358 - Karma: 30
I hope he does one showing how to get that afterbang!
Feb 7 2011 6:12AM
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HIT
Posts: 3524 - Karma: 4,996
i know theyre not quotes but yesterday i got to see some gaper fun and was it ever funny

this is all in the same day

3 people skiing so slowly down the hill, allof a sudden start converging towards each other, cant stop andcollide but since it was low speed they didnt get hurt they all just fell into a pile together and slid down the hill

HAHAH

then this couple try to get on the catskinner chair but this lady somehow manages tosnap her pole between the ground and chair, and manages to get thrown 5 feet to the side. she went and cried behind the lift shack and her husband threw the broken pole then went to comfort her

still laughed my ass off

then im waiting to get on the lift next, line in front of us goes but some random single comes outtanowhere and tries to join the already full line in front of me. since there was no room for him he doesnt know what to do and gets smoked from the side by the chair, looked so painful

Feb 7 2011 9:55AM
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esjaydee
Posts: 1696 - Karma: 365
1: Are you good?
2: I'm aight
3: Can you like do a backflip?

Feb 7 2011 10:51AM
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mmallender.
Posts: 5805 - Karma: 936
damn you kids are behind... thats scott vail
Feb 7 2011 11:42AM
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hot.pocket
Posts: 4227 - Karma: 10,648
finally got asked "can you do a front flip?" for the first time the other day
Feb 7 2011 1:24PM
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Kimbo~Slice
Posts: 522 - Karma: 194
He sounded so bitter when he said "urban rail"!
and that "270" dismount was amazing at the end! :/
Feb 7 2011 1:44PM
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Crehm
Posts: 951 - Karma: 842
that vid was pro, the last guy wasnt a TOTAL gaper tho
Feb 7 2011 4:21PM
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Kimbo~Slice
Posts: 522 - Karma: 194
how big were those poles!!!
Feb 7 2011 4:32PM
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Pool.
Posts: 2820 - Karma: 662
Today I wore my new level 1 crew and my friend comes up to me and says, that's sick! Do you also have a level 2 one!?
Feb 7 2011 6:35PM
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Pee_and_Ski
Posts: 1869 - Karma: 57
this weekend some lady came up to be when i was waiting for some friends and started giving me shit for doing butters, skiing switch and hitting side booters. made for an funny first run
Feb 7 2011 7:35PM
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Cincher
Posts: 3403 - Karma: 535
just some weird situations that happened today:

I go to and from my local shop quite often because of an ongoing process of making my boots painless, and to save money for gas, I always use public transit from my edge-of-suburbia house to downtown. Always get the weirdest looks when I walk onto a loaded bus with my Line Anthems..

As I was transferring buses, two girls decided to ask, "Liek, omg, where you going skiing?"

I respond with "nowhere! I'm going to get these fixed! And if I'm skiing anywhere tonight it'll probably be my backyard!"

Them:"What?! How can you ski your backyard? :D"

Me:"I piled snow into a ramp, put a rail in front and I slide it and repeat!"

Them:"You liar! Skiers can't slide rails, unless you have a snowboard!"

Me:"Watch me..."

I was late for my transfer so I ended that rediculous conversation there. The manager at Gord's whom I'm pretty familiar with got a good laugh out of it.
Feb 7 2011 10:06PM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
haha thats always a classic one, but dont be so mean with your first response before theyve actually proved themselves to be annoying gapers. i mean they just asked where u were goin and by the look of all ur !!!!!!!! u answered pretty mad
Feb 7 2011 10:21PM
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Flying~Squirrel
Posts: 6494 - Karma: 192
i heard a kid call a battleship rail a "up flat down" and a rainbow a "wave"
Feb 7 2011 11:01PM
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HitTheJim
Posts: 787 - Karma: 399
Thanks for the link man. I'm totally going to go buy a GoPro so I can show off my sick new rail skills to all my buddies!
Feb 7 2011 11:10PM
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Thugly-Gnarskins
Posts: 120 - Karma: 17
oh my lanta
Feb 7 2011 11:16PM
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Pool.
Posts: 2820 - Karma: 662
he did have some major heavy head afterbang
Feb 7 2011 11:19PM
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ChrisSkisChronic
Posts: 1128 - Karma: 230
I know a complete gaper of a snowboarder. He's stuck in 2003, he thinks helmets are for women and skiing is so inferior to boarding. It was a "powder" day here (read 15cm of quebec's finest) and he asked why no one was skiing through "those powder piles" pointing to the giant ice clumps from snowmaking. After everything got tracked out (which doesn't take long around here) he was so pumped to go to the park. I let him drop first and he just goes around every single rail. When we get to the bottom he asks "wasn't that sick?"



ugh...
Feb 8 2011 9:16AM
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Kimbo~Slice
Posts: 522 - Karma: 194
Some dougie in physics class:
"so do you use gamma rays for x-rays?"

and in the same class:
I'm like the incredible hulk, just not green, and better looking





and stronger.

First one is a physics gaper comment. The other was just funny at the time...
Feb 8 2011 11:36AM
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Cincher
Posts: 3403 - Karma: 535
I wasn't mad people, haha! Downtown was loud, and I was shouting for volume reasons. Didn't think people would enterpret all those exclamation marks as anger..

My demeanor was relatively calm.
Feb 8 2011 12:04PM
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wootang
Posts: 284 - Karma: 404
Gaper: "OUCH"

(As I tail tapped his helmet while he was standing on the knuckle of a 50 ft step down at mammoth 3 weeks ago)
Feb 8 2011 2:55PM
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bustinthejus
Posts: 2419 - Karma: 74
Hahaha I had some kids the other day point at my Level 1 sticker and ask me what it meant... I said it's a skiing company and one of 'em goes "so... is that good?" I'm like what...? and one of them goes "Why level 1?? Why not like, level 19 or something!?"
Feb 8 2011 3:30PM
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HitTheJim
Posts: 787 - Karma: 399
My own gaper moment. On the magic carpet back up to the top of the jib park at my home mtn (there's 3 parks: one w/ jumps, one w/ jib features, and a beginner one), I feel myself slowly sliding backwards on the magic carpet. I then start to feel my tails flex out as I start to fall, and a couple little snowboarders start yelling at me, "Dude, dude, dude, dude!" I then fall down directly on the carpet, pop off my skis, and proceed to hike the rest. In my defense, the slope is way too steep for a magic carpet, but it was still pretty gaperish on my part. I laughed it off though because skiing is all about having fun, remember that kids.
Feb 8 2011 4:06PM
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infuser
Posts: 1220 - Karma: 241

while recomending skis for my friend i showed him afterbangs

he then states, "those are strictly for park, i wanna be able to leave the park sometimes."

Feb 8 2011 4:24PM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
oh haha ok. funny story, but without knowing it was noisy you did seem quite angry
Feb 8 2011 4:57PM
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Cincher
Posts: 3403 - Karma: 535
I should have mentioned it, but I didn't think it was an issue.
Feb 8 2011 5:15PM
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j.saaaarela
Posts: 1859 - Karma: 856
In psych today:

Teacher: "Name one person who cannot communicate verbally, but does emotionally."

someone sitting behind me: "Ray Charles"


not even skiing related, but still a moment of incredible ignorance.
I wanted to slap dat bitch.
Feb 8 2011 6:12PM
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JWoods
Posts: 2369 - Karma: 2,635
I feel like I saw this
Feb 8 2011 6:53PM
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.Ian.
Posts: 1568 - Karma: 72
At waterville today some gaper on the lift points to some racer and says "oh I shoulda worn my wetsuit today" hahaha.
Feb 8 2011 10:04PM
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Cincher
Posts: 3403 - Karma: 535
crossing the street in full ski outerwear + skis in my Dakine Heli Pro II pack, the funniest looks I've ever seen from motorists. If there's kids in the back the parents seem to feel it necessary to alert them.

On the bus, I'm apologizing left and right for my skis clumsily hitting the handle bars.
Feb 9 2011 12:07AM
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ColinB
Posts: 1452 - Karma: 2,236
hahahahahaha YES
Feb 9 2011 9:07AM
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sack
Posts: 4881 - Karma: 147
I can remember some days when I seriously would have worn a wetsuit skiing
Feb 9 2011 4:23PM
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Wiscompton
Posts: 152 - Karma: 11
Fail!
Feb 9 2011 5:04PM
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wootang
Posts: 284 - Karma: 404
The step down above the top of South Park. Gaper in classic gaping gear: Red one piece (yes..tucked into boots) and sunglasses.  String of profanity followed shortly thereafter.
Feb 9 2011 5:22PM
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nick3713
Posts: 147 - Karma: 10

some lady asked me if i had lights on the bottoms of my skis(i have anthems)

i just kinda mumbled about how she was stupid and then turned around

Feb 10 2011 10:27PM
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Isabelle
Posts: 947 - Karma: 1,582
How awesome would it have been if you Indeed had lights at the bottom of your skis!
Feb 11 2011 9:11AM
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GNARwalls
Posts: 1287 - Karma: 528

standing at the top of the lift and the gaper asks if i could grind the lift...

Feb 11 2011 9:23AM
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crescentfresh
Posts: 60 - Karma: 24
lol
Feb 11 2011 9:25AM
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thisisastickup
Posts: 597 - Karma: -24

I showed one of the doctors at the hospital this video of me breaking my leg:

http://www.vimeo.com/19769842

he says: "I bet you broke it because you lost control when you accidentally skied off of that cliff, that thing was HUGE!"

I was just like no dude, it went a little differently.

Feb 11 2011 9:55AM
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Raptor.
Posts: 784 - Karma: 255
i don't get it. did you break it when you went off the cliff or when you started yelling?
Feb 11 2011 3:28PM
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Pool.
Posts: 2820 - Karma: 662
I was at the top of the lift at my mountain and a guy told me that the back of my skis were bent up and I should go to a store to get them checked out, I told him that they were freestyle skis, he said oh like hot dogging? To avoid being mean I skiied away then started dying with laughter
Feb 11 2011 6:12PM
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Static
Posts: 8555 - Karma: 4,066
haha what a family of gapers, great contribution
you for wanting DC stickers
and your daddy for thinking DC is trying to scam kids $2 at a time
Feb 11 2011 6:30PM
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benyannelli
Posts: 773 - Karma: 562

im an instructor so i can ski free and every single day people come up to me and say

"how do you stop"

Feb 11 2011 6:41PM
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