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The best gaper quotes

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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
somebody on the chairlift yesterday asked me what they did with the moguls at the end of the year?
i also gotten "what altitude do the dear turn to elk?"
Mar 10 2008 7:33PM
2709 528
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*TURBONERD*
Posts: 15081 - Karma: 9,158
lolwut. I still can't believe they called that a trip cork, obv frontside trip rodeo 12, basically what bobby brown or sammy did (dunno if torstein's was switch)
Jan 31 2011 10:38PM
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TheBist
Posts: 187 - Karma: 33
Holy fuck........

Im tired as shit as people thinking i should snowboard because i wear baggy clothes and do tricks.
Jan 31 2011 10:41PM
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stickski
Posts: 1938 - Karma: 1,529
how about EVERY SINGLE thing that comes out of gapers mouths when they see my skis... no they're not water skis no i didn't break them haha i ski at alta and i have one lifes
Jan 31 2011 10:41PM
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TheBist
Posts: 187 - Karma: 33
haha
Jan 31 2011 10:42PM
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TheBist
Posts: 187 - Karma: 33
Gaper: Why do you have skis on? You look like a snowboarder.
Me: No i just think having baggy clothes looks better and is more comfortable.
Gaper: Are one of dem park rats?
Me: Nah i really just ski everything, but i do like park quite a bit.
Gaper: Whoa! Does that mean you can do a backflip!!!!
no response....

Jan 31 2011 10:46PM
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84891jnf92048
Posts: 11552 - Karma: 2,550
so many people get confused about my afterbangs...
Jan 31 2011 10:57PM
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thehighestllama
Posts: 81 - Karma: 464
So I was at my local shitty mountain and they had one really small park open (being early season on the east coast.) I see a jibber who is filming. The rig he was using was an old camcorder mounted on a piece of wood with a counterweight on the bottom to stabilize. Some 40 year old guy goes up to him and asks if its a GoPro. The kid just laughed and skied away.
Feb 1 2011 12:19AM
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IrishShredder
Posts: 23 - Karma: 10
I'm skiing a pair of Surface Onelife's. They have a ton of rocker.

gaper: dude your skis are broken, did you have to pay full price for those broken skis?
Me: they arent broken
gaper: yea they are look!
Me: dude they are just way too cool for your mind to comprehend, they have gnarly rocker
gaper: soo did you have to pay full price for them?
Me: ...


Feb 1 2011 12:24AM
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Bethune
Posts: 435 - Karma: 26
Hey look! I can see my goggles in your goggles!
Feb 1 2011 1:24AM
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E.FARR
Posts: 1297 - Karma: 25
when i was like 10 i was on the freestyle team at my mtn...we did bumps all day..the original freestyle..
Feb 1 2011 6:42AM
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Matty~k
Posts: 108 - Karma: 89
i was floating down the snake river in WY. in august and the Grand Tetons are right next to the river the person that i was guiding asked me what the white stuff on the mountain was.....................................................................................i didn't reply

another person asked "is that MT Everest??????? 




 both of these people were about 40-45
Feb 1 2011 9:45AM
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Deezy
Posts: 4580 - Karma: 1,004
why do you wear your goggles so low?
why do you wear a hat under ur helmet?
why is that guy skiing backwards? are his skis broken?

i love chairlifts... great conversations
Feb 1 2011 10:38AM
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Emma_Watson
Posts: 4491 - Karma: 6,797
Why do you wear your goggles under your helmet?
Feb 1 2011 4:46PM
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P-HAGAR
Posts: 608 - Karma: 159
there's a nice cool breeze rippin between my goggles and helmet!
Feb 1 2011 5:18PM
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monkatizer
Posts: 4704 - Karma: 1,518
a bunch of gaper kids at my school think i suck because i dont do the airels jumps (the ones like at the olympics, and we dont have those) and they think that skiing park is the same thing as airels
Feb 1 2011 5:28PM
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Pugh
Posts: 138 - Karma: 27
this
Feb 1 2011 5:36PM
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Ski_Alot
Posts: 5900 - Karma: 3,657
there were a bunch of kids renting skis and i saw one do a 180 and his tips got caught and flew back and smashed his head. he proceeded to lie in the landing of a jump for 10 minutes screaming that switch is impossible.
Feb 1 2011 5:46PM
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ButterItOut
Posts: 1094 - Karma: 420
Hahahahah ^ thats funny    some older guy at my mountain started tallkgint bout skiing and metioned the park, me riding there i say i yah the park here is really nice, he looks at me then looks at my skis and laughs. did i mention he had skis from 1985 and a green one piece... Gapers
Feb 1 2011 5:47PM
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Zinky
Posts: 486 - Karma: 42
mindboggling...
Feb 1 2011 5:59PM
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s-hand
Posts: 1334 - Karma: 1,800
A friend of mine was convinced that heli-skiing involved a person jumping from a hovering heli and landing on the hill.  He then preceded to ask me why they didn't have heli-skiing at Springs (700ft vertical, 20ish runs).  I didn't answer...
Feb 1 2011 6:19PM
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philipc
Posts: 6651 - Karma: 1,286
a kid at the top of the loon park asked what skullcandy meant
Feb 1 2011 6:25PM
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lanny94
Posts: 1374 - Karma: 165
on the lift with two snowboarders that still thought they were fifteen but where in there mid 30s. and one of them was tellin his friend that his boardsparked when he went over this rock then  he didnt have time to dodge the rock and hit it and fire ignited right off the back of his bpard and probably melted the snow behind him
Feb 1 2011 6:28PM
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Film.
Posts: 2649 - Karma: 2,296
this really annyoing kid named dylan demonbrun he supposvely snowboards and he is a proffesional and posts all these fake picture on facebook of him and he says he can do a double cork 10 and the other day he posted a pic on facebook of him doing a backflip the pic is from 1995 he's 13. my friends and i have also had some experinces about him one day he is going to keystone on saturday the next day we ask where he is going snowboarding this weekend he says vail because we say were going to keystone.
Feb 1 2011 6:37PM
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Potguy
Posts: 125 - Karma: 147
I thought that my friend did a flatspin 3 once but it was a good thing that there was a gaper there to let me know that it was ACTUALY a really bad backflip
Feb 1 2011 6:50PM
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Panda_with_Guns
Posts: 3040 - Karma: 1,620
fail. just fail. straight up.
Feb 1 2011 6:53PM
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StompinStraights
Posts: 136 - Karma: 32
"So like.. How come you ski backwards, don't your skis catch?"
Feb 1 2011 6:54PM
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Aaaron.
Posts: 11817 - Karma: 903
yeah man. that annoys me. i have been accidentally signed up in the snowboard category of two rail jams. both times i had to say actually, i ski.

woman, look down at my boots. they're ski boots, not snowboard boot. dangit.
Feb 3 2011 6:56PM
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Film.
Posts: 2649 - Karma: 2,296
Yea its pretty funny he is not even good at lieing
Feb 3 2011 7:36PM
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84891jnf92048
Posts: 11552 - Karma: 2,550
all i got is this.....

Click for larger image
Feb 3 2011 8:33PM
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fatherb
Posts: 1510 - Karma: 173
Bahahah! someone photoshop!
Feb 3 2011 8:48PM
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infuser
Posts: 1220 - Karma: 241

gaper friend: im going to belleayre on saturday

me: nice it will probably be a sick powder day

Gaper: whats that

me: your so stupid its ridiculous

Gaper: is february 6th like national powder day or something?

me: facepalm

Feb 3 2011 8:53PM
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.cam.
Posts: 1852 - Karma: 48
(insert thall pic here)
Feb 3 2011 9:11PM
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ganja_enthusiast
Posts: 1119 - Karma: 34
while wating in line:
gaper: hey dude wana go to the trick park
his friend: yeah dude. i can get air in the big jumps
gaper: dude im a trick parker
Feb 3 2011 9:21PM
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StompinStraights
Posts: 136 - Karma: 32
Thats one huge fail.
Feb 5 2011 12:45PM
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TNORTS
Posts: 2077 - Karma: 2,756
Click for larger image
Feb 5 2011 4:14PM
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BlakeG
Posts: 1450 - Karma: 1,030
thats how freestyle skiing started with moguls
Feb 5 2011 4:56PM
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Wiscompton
Posts: 152 - Karma: 11
Yeah and a mute 360 was the double cork back then.
Feb 5 2011 5:10PM
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snasty
Posts: 167 - Karma: 27

"whats the difference between powder and packed snow?"

"All snow is the same, snow isnt heavier or lighter"

"Whats powder day?"

Feb 5 2011 5:22PM
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E.C.
Posts: 3211 - Karma: 319
not really gaper quote but i was on the lift and some guy was talking about he was drunk and had explosive diarrhea. he ten proceeded to explain how he cleaned the bowl without water...
Feb 5 2011 5:22PM
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Jimmy.
Posts: 2888 - Karma: 27
win.
Feb 5 2011 5:30PM
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Flying~Squirrel
Posts: 6494 - Karma: 192
haha, i dont know. he said "stop at the rail, i need to sit down."
Feb 5 2011 5:33PM
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Evilchris
Posts: 2090 - Karma: 44
I love you so much
Feb 5 2011 5:44PM
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TNORTS
Posts: 2077 - Karma: 2,756
I try
Feb 5 2011 5:45PM
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monkatizer
Posts: 4704 - Karma: 1,518
i was riding up with a mom and her 2 girls or somthin, and they were cheering from the lift when somone did a frickin straight air over a 30 foot. then they were wondering if there was somthing under the jumps or if ther were made out of all snow, i told them it was all snow except for the halfpipe wich kinda has walls out of dirt.

then they wondered what they attach the rails to if it was all snow. i explainde they were in the snow very deep and wont fall over.

what a bunch of noobz
Feb 5 2011 11:46PM
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grilledsteezeyo
Posts: 1419 - Karma: 72
as i was waiting in line for the lift at carinthia i hear some lady yell to someone with her on a snowboard, yeah obviously i dont belong in the terrain park because im on skis, but im ridin with you so ill be okay right?
Feb 6 2011 12:50PM
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emilyskis
Posts: 326 - Karma: 119
"Do all skis have breaks?"
Feb 6 2011 3:00PM
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jeremy.g
Posts: 4931 - Karma: 459
rakin the park last night a group of people proceed through the park stopping on the very top of every lip. i hear one of them say,

"do you go pole straps on when you hit big jumps, or do you take them off?"
haha
Feb 6 2011 3:06PM
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Wiscompton
Posts: 152 - Karma: 11
Not a bad question actually... I go no straps because I have been speared by my poles from being attached to my wrist.  Also I find it uncomfortable for some reason so I remove the straps from my poles... But it also helps incase you lose grip from your pole when doing a grab or something.  The guy was just wondering and I could see good skiers ask the same question.
Feb 6 2011 3:13PM
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jibco
Posts: 109 - Karma: 27
this. I had a chick tell me my "makeup was uneven"...
Feb 6 2011 3:27PM
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