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The best gaper quotes

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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
somebody on the chairlift yesterday asked me what they did with the moguls at the end of the year?
i also gotten "what altitude do the dear turn to elk?"
Mar 10 2008 7:33PM
2709 528
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j.saaaarela
Posts: 1859 - Karma: 856
i havent so far, with the gel tongue, gel heel, and gel toe. admittedly the toebox does feel a bit more roomy than, say, an agent 80, but i dont think it has affected performance at all. soooooo comfy
Dec 18 2010 3:20AM
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Daydreaming
Posts: 1686 - Karma: 48
Maybe he meant you were kicking up rooster tails?
Dec 18 2010 10:47AM
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Simon.k
Posts: 918 - Karma: 1,053
so i was at my local mountian and i walked out of the lodge when an asian couple approched me, they guy says " these boots work in those?" i replyed " no those are snowboard boots, you need the kind of boots im wearing for skis." girl turns to guy and says "you! fucking retard!" i just laugh and walk away
Dec 18 2010 2:05PM
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future-spins
Posts: 395 - Karma: 900
one time one of my friends was filming un on the knuckle and there was a gaper and his child and in the back all you kad hear is "hey timmy, timmy watch timmy timmy, look, timmy, they are aproching the ramp timmy, are you gona see it (someone dose a 900) wow timmy, what was that a 720?" then for a frontflip he called a forward summersalt, a cork 7 a helocopter and them me fav was 2 years ago at a big air event where in the finals someone did a bio 7 and the anouncer said "he did a flippy spinny trick"
Dec 18 2010 6:03PM
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[evan]
Posts: 5628 - Karma: 117
While on the lift with Tom Wallisch during the Dew Tour at Mt. Snow

Tom Wallisch to me: so hows the park today?
Me: It's pretty good, a little slow, but its whatever.
Gaper to Tom: Hey were you in that contest earlier doing all those tricky things?
Click for larger image

Dec 18 2010 7:42PM
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ilikefood
Posts: 391 - Karma: 769
In the Whistler Creekside gondola....

Girl:do you ski them black inclines?
Me: yea, the black runs
Girl: I like the green inclines the most, ya know theyre really relaxing. I dont really like the blue inclines 'cause it will be like a green incline, but then the incline gets really steep.

face palm.
Dec 18 2010 9:28PM
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yuck
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 2,090
you are retarded hahaha you know nothing about the boots you have
Dec 18 2010 9:30PM
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Emma_Watson
Posts: 4491 - Karma: 6,797
pics or it didnt happen.
Dec 18 2010 10:00PM
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Daydreaming
Posts: 1686 - Karma: 48
I think you forgot to /claim
Dec 19 2010 1:49AM
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[evan]
Posts: 5628 - Karma: 117
The only picture i have is me with tom during a signing like 15 minutes before we went up. There was a filmer with us because Verizon had set it up, but there wasnt enough footy to put anything together.
Dec 19 2010 2:30AM
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CrunkNugget
Posts: 1279 - Karma: 16
"mountains are open on weekdays?"
Dec 20 2010 3:18AM
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skifoo
Posts: 1396 - Karma: 45
i was trying to fix my ski, and next to me two about 14 years old guys were trying to fit skiboot on ski binding for about 15 minutes..
''wtf?! why my boot doesnt fit to ski binding!!!'', Other guy '' oh cmon, just stomp hard as you can!''

after a while the other guy said '' take your boot off and let me try''

then i went and said '' i think it would be great if you opened your binding before trying to fit it''
ahahaha it was so funny _D
Dec 20 2010 12:02PM
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Keith.
Posts: 967 - Karma: 88
same shit happens to me
Dec 20 2010 12:07PM
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rozboon
Posts: 1642 - Karma: 868
I once watched some guy try for about 5 minutes to get his boot into a closed binding. I was about to say something, when through some enormous triumph of gaperology he managed to smash his boot into the binding, clipped in properly and all, and ski away. To this day I have no idea how, I guess he just overpowered the forward pressure spring or something.
Dec 20 2010 6:14PM
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Evilchris
Posts: 2090 - Karma: 44
i admit that I've done this before. :(
Dec 20 2010 6:50PM
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KillaSeason
Posts: 3495 - Karma: 1,774
I would have fucked that little shit up sooooo much
Dec 20 2010 7:34PM
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.Roockley.
Posts: 3864 - Karma: 4,078
where i work the bindings are really shitty and i've seen plenty of people do that

still confuses me why they dont check, they get taught that on lessons
Dec 20 2010 7:36PM
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switchington
Posts: 277 - Karma: 14
do you work at xscape?
Dec 21 2010 4:27PM
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clark.
Posts: 308 - Karma: 14
Skiing last Saturday:

Doing a few chill runs and out of no where a friend does a cork 7 on this cut-up jump thing. Other friend drops in next and does a backflip. Cruise down to the lift and get on. At the top we're surrounded by a bunch of gapers. One points and says "look there's the guy who's been doing backflips!" The friend who did the cork 7 just chuckles.

Funny how fast word gets out that you're doing crazy backflips.
Dec 21 2010 5:17PM
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Lavieille
Posts: 814 - Karma: 318
gaper "are those double tips"?
me "umm yeah twin tips"
gaper "woah cool, i tried skiing once"
me "nice it's fun"
gaper "yeah i think i've seen you at the park"
me "yeah....."
me (first day every at bristol)
Dec 21 2010 5:56PM
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WakeBakeFapNap
Posts: 258 - Karma: 28

i couple of years ago i got my first pair of twin tips and the first day up my friend(major gapper and a snowboarder) was asking me about my new skis.

gaper: i like your new skis cam

me: thanks

gaper: so what are the tails bent up for?

me; so you can go backwards

gaper: no

me no?

gaper: you cant go backswards on skis because you cant see

Dec 21 2010 6:24PM
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POWDER.RANGER
Posts: 1698 - Karma: -24
my buddy and i were talking about our oakley crowbars, just callin em cbars, and out other friend (snowboarder) says "so, are cbars just like a different model of the crowbar??"

and aparrently beginner skis dont have edges
Dec 22 2010 8:55PM
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DockEllis
Posts: 1131 - Karma: 1,745
I work at the front desk of a hotel in Big Sky and the other morning we had 2 inches of fresh snow on the ground. A gaper staying in a ski in/ski out condo called me up and asked if he could get a shovel because there was "too much snow" to ski to the groomer.
Dec 22 2010 9:05PM
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607.
Posts: 521 - Karma: 35
"i need to get my edges sharpened because i keep slipping off these boxes"
Dec 22 2010 11:53PM
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T-ROB
Posts: 252 - Karma: 649
I ski grouse (nuff said), where we get LOTS of gapers.  I once even saw a guy struggling to put on his ski, only he was trying to fit his toe into his heelpiece ON FLATBACKS!!!  wow.

Two days ago my buddy and I were listening to someone in the lift line explaining how the snowboarders were all coming out of the terrain park and how all the skiers were coming off the main runs. obviously no skier can ever get any air because you can only do that on a board!

Yesterday, I was walking through North Vancouver (where there are three ski hills) with my skis and some old guy came up to me and said "Theres no snow". When I told him he was wrong he then added that there must be like 2 feet at most.

It amazes me how little people in Vancouver actually know about their own mountains, and how there are many kids in my school who have never been skiing even though my school is literally right at the bottom of the mountain!

Dec 23 2010 12:22AM
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Where-am-I
Posts: 1635 - Karma: 281
not a quote but the other day i saw a kid with snowblades on backwards
Dec 23 2010 2:08AM
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STEEZUS_CHRI5T
Posts: 2944 - Karma: 22,415
The other week I was trying to do a double frontflip but i never got all the way around. After I picked up after my yard sale some kid yelled "Did you see that kid, he almost did two somersaults in the air!" I was completely floored...
Dec 23 2010 9:51AM
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Amadeus
Posts: 67 - Karma: 13
The worst possible gaper quote is when I saw a _SICK_ gaper ranting about how much he hated gapers. He had a gap between his helmet and goggles + a few seconds after his long speech to his friends that I overheard i threw a 270 on the smallest jump imaginable and bailed so hard.. damn that was cash.
Dec 23 2010 10:23AM
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J-Style
Posts: 14 - Karma: 42
Riding up the chair in Powder Mountain with a teenage couple right after a huge snowfall (from the sky):
Girl: Is this all man made snow?
Guy:I don't know. It's possible.
Girl: Man that's a lot of snow to make to cover this whole mountain.
Dec 23 2010 10:32AM
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KillaSeason
Posts: 3495 - Karma: 1,774
today at my mountain. mother to child.

kid" I am going to go off tis ramp"

parent " NO! THAT JUMP IS WAY TO BIG!


the gap on the jump was about 5 feet. and if he was to undershoot, nothing at all would even affect him
Dec 29 2010 7:47PM
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Simon.k
Posts: 918 - Karma: 1,053
hahaha thats great
Dec 29 2010 8:35PM
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madsteeze420
Posts: 15 - Karma: 10

i just like seeing some kids faces when i ride up switch into the lift line. that or the kids who get all worked up about seeing a guy throw a 3 off a little kicker on the side of a trail.

Dec 29 2010 9:02PM
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Ski_ThEast
Posts: 1676 - Karma: 272
gaper: where were u skiing today anywhere good?
me: i was in the park
gaper: oh is that the run with all those jumps and rails
me: yea
gaper: why where u there its only for snowboarders skiers aren't allowed in i thought
me: nope im pretty sure im allowed in

then gaper continues to argue that the parks are for snowboarders only and i shouldnt go in or i will get in trouble by ski patrol
Dec 29 2010 9:22PM
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sack
Posts: 4881 - Karma: 147
I saw a woman with snowblades shaped like feet. I chuckled.
I wonder where you get equipment that bad
Dec 29 2010 11:16PM
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KillaSeason
Posts: 3495 - Karma: 1,774
haha thats actually kinda cool
Dec 29 2010 11:36PM
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Spic-N-SpaN
Posts: 2002 - Karma: 1,465
In the lift line i heard this old lady say:
"those skiiers look like bank robbers"

We proceeded to laugh hysterically
Dec 29 2010 11:54PM
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JRath
Posts: 55 - Karma: 22
Dude you should get a ski-doo suite there realy warm and stylish
Dec 30 2010 12:12AM
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basedjase
Posts: 2510 - Karma: 640
Its all good.
Dec 30 2010 5:17PM
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spaustin889
Posts: 166 - Karma: 13
like 4 years ago it was one of my first few times skiing. I was with a bud and we were on a double w/ a mid-mtn dropoff. I thought we were going all the way up, he thought we were going 1/2 way. Right as we were trying to get off 1/2 way I try to shut my backpack and leave my tips down.

Tips dig into the drop off and i go forward falling just under the lift. Best part was it slung the chair soo much it launched my friend straight off about 5-7ft and he faceplants!

Guy walks out after turning the lift off, looks at me and simply says, "nice pants." referring to my plaid burtons
Dec 30 2010 5:23PM
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Emma_Watson
Posts: 4491 - Karma: 6,797
look he's going backwards!
Dec 30 2010 5:38PM
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Phil-X-
Posts: 7205 - Karma: 14,399
10 year old kid- "hey didnt you used to snowboard?!?!?"


me- "....no..?"


10 year old kid- "no i think you did.. i remember you here last year"


i was so cunfuse.

Dec 30 2010 5:38PM
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gombo8
Posts: 726 - Karma: 131

so i was night skiing last night and the park was pretty much emtpy with the few local snowboarders and skiiers and the park patrol. then there was this one group of skiiers and snowboarders who were going off the side of the jump and landing before the actually lip and they were going off the jumps and landing like 2 feet passed the lip on a 25 footer. they were fucking up all the lips and we yelled at them form the lift to stop. we later find them in the park with 2 snowboarding sitting on a box. they all were rockin at least a 3 inch gap. so we go up to them and tell them to stop doing it there fucking up the jumps and one person returns with " thats not us i just did a misty 9 off that jump and he just did rodeo 5...they had rental salomon xwing skis in about a 155...

gotta love gapers

Dec 30 2010 6:17PM
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DreadHawkins
Posts: 59 - Karma: 13
ME: "why do those skis have two tips?"

GAPER: "........."

ME: "can you do a helicopter or a backflip?"

GAPER: (Proceeds to take my lunch money and smash my sandwich)
Dec 30 2010 9:11PM
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.Midwest
Posts: 493 - Karma: 22
Change your icon bud, icon stealing is highly frowned upon on ns.
Dec 30 2010 9:15PM
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JibInMyPants
Posts: 132 - Karma: 115

Gaper "friend" of mine after I shoot off into the trees next to a groomer.

Me- that was fun.

Friend- dude, that looks crazy back there!

Me- its alright...

Friend- yeah man, I wont ever go into the backcountry.

Me- what?

Friend- you know, the trees, the backcountry.

Me- What The Fuck bro...

Friend- whats wrong?

Me- (shake my head) Fucking Noob...

Friend- Fuck you...

Dec 30 2010 9:22PM
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j.saaaarela
Posts: 1859 - Karma: 856
i spent a solid 10 minutes on the lift trying to explain to some kid that my alpha 1s aren't pow skis. He just kept saying "but they're rockered." Yes, a rockered park ski. with an 80 something waist. And listed as a park ski on Armada's site....."but they're rockered"
Dec 30 2010 9:29PM
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3-6-steeze
Posts: 1135 - Karma: 147
Me and my friend get off the lift line, and some gaper old woman says "those look like snowboards! no, skiboards!" referring to our skis
Dec 30 2010 9:39PM
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KillaSeason
Posts: 3495 - Karma: 1,774
but dude, they're ROCKERED












:)
Dec 30 2010 9:40PM
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fatherb
Posts: 1510 - Karma: 173
you're a jerk
Dec 30 2010 9:46PM
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Deluge
Posts: 4401 - Karma: 805
Today while riding up with a Gaper Mom

Gaper Mom: Are those the skis with 2 tips

Me: Yeah theyre twin tips

Gaper Mom: Yeahh those are for spraying the snow up in the back, right?

Me: (in disbelief) Yes.

Gaper Mom: Ooo those are fun, I should get a pair

silence for the rest of the ride

Dec 30 2010 9:54PM
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