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The best gaper quotes

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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,343
somebody on the chairlift yesterday asked me what they did with the moguls at the end of the year?
i also gotten "what altitude do the dear turn to elk?"
Mar 10 2008 7:33PM
2709 528
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superpoluha
Posts: 1986 - Karma: 10
can you do those helicopter spins?

and


snow-blades are better because there is less surface area
Feb 1 2010 9:00PM
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TheRancor
Posts: 51 - Karma: 78
I have line anthems eric pollard LTD skis and i was on the middle of a lift with my friend and some random guy with jumpsuit and skinny mogul skis the guy said to me

Him: well you your not from around here

Me: i have a season pass

Him: well you have you there powder skis

Me:(in a canadian accent) yeah acutely im from British columbia wisler and im here for the day

Him: wow, really

Me: No... and looked away
Feb 1 2010 9:30PM
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Skittle.
Posts: 2537 - Karma: 718
standin in the lift line with my JJs:

Gaper: did you bend the tips and tales like that yourself?
Me: No they come like like that
Gaper: oh... so are they like super powder skis?
Me: Um... sure
Feb 1 2010 9:44PM
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Trojan~Man
Posts: 1996 - Karma: 1,357
same thing just happened to me. thats when you know someone's a real tool.
Feb 1 2010 10:44PM
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j_hamborg
Posts: 560 - Karma: 745
Wore my Level 1 tall tee to this local hill tonight, Gaper Central! got asked "Shouldn't that say Level 360?" and "What about Level 2?" And then the classic "why is your shirt so long?" capped off with several requests for backflips...
Feb 2 2010 1:29AM
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theo79
Posts: 305 - Karma: 70
this old guy was looking at my boots (ace of spades) on the lift, and says to me

"those boots make you look like a gaper"


Feb 2 2010 11:11AM
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skichicky3
Posts: 2593 - Karma: 64
hahahahhaha thats awesome
Feb 2 2010 2:36PM
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wasatch_rat
Posts: 1772 - Karma: 2,952
to be honest that doesnt seem that gaperish...
this thread has gone to shit. just a bunch of people talking about how much cooler they are than gapers
Feb 2 2010 2:40PM
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highindasky55
Posts: 624 - Karma: 32
no worries i got him. you know someone's a tool when they have twice as many posts as karma...
Feb 2 2010 3:48PM
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Ryan*
Posts: 1827 - Karma: 1,195
Puuuuriceless.
Feb 2 2010 10:31PM
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DirtYStylE
Posts: 3652 - Karma: 8,888
Im skiing with my volkl walls

Do those skis have reverse camber?
Feb 2 2010 10:33PM
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Gorno
Posts: 266 - Karma: 28

My desktop at work rotates between a few wallpapers and everyone out here has the same response when a picture comes up of someone riding a rail on skis....

"Do you snowboard?" or

"Do you ski?" .... yes I do ...."why don't you just snowboard?"

Feb 2 2010 11:54PM
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Isabelle
Posts: 947 - Karma: 1,582

If another person will come up to me and says "just go snowboarding it's way cooler"  I'm prbly gonna kill him.

Feb 3 2010 6:27AM
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some-skill
Posts: 167 - Karma: 10
So i just come through the park and i come in to the run in to the run-in to a jump with my brother, and theres only a few people there. theres a snow boarder, and a ski patrol. so I pull in front of the ski patrol because he obviously wasn't ready or wasn't even going to hit. then he stops me and says

HEY KID. last time i checked, were in America. and in America, there are lines. so first i go, then he goes, THEN you go.
in a southern accent
he then proceeds to turn to the far left of the jump, and not even hit the roller.

And of course the usual
Are those snowboard skis?
Feb 3 2010 8:40AM
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fratskier69
Posts: 1868 - Karma: 1,273
i detect a lie
noob
Feb 3 2010 5:38PM
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fratskier69
Posts: 1868 - Karma: 1,273
yes, always
Feb 3 2010 5:39PM
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fratskier69
Posts: 1868 - Karma: 1,273
ok so my dad just came back from alta, (i know lucky guy)
he was talking to his firend about all the new ski technology (ie rockered ski)

my dad: yeah its crazy now the skis are rockered!

friend: how do you rocker your own skis?

me: facepalm, then "that is going on NS tomorrow"

true story,
Feb 3 2010 5:43PM
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butter161
Posts: 111 - Karma: 12
i have the line invaders with the blue and pink wrestlers on them and a couple of girls who where probably about 10 are just going through the park and notice my skis and ski up:

them: those skis are pretty
me:....thanks
them: are you going to do that rail with them?
me: yes
them: why itll ruin the prettyness! (sounding utterly horrified)
me: its what i do *drop in*
Feb 3 2010 5:59PM
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Phil-X-
Posts: 7205 - Karma: 14,399
but the thing is you can rocker your own skis....
Feb 3 2010 9:26PM
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Mike.Steezze
Posts: 407 - Karma: 17
HAHA yeah Alberta and BC skiin is the shit. But you have to be retarded to rocker your own skis, you will just ruin them.
Feb 4 2010 2:09AM
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murs
Posts: 1684 - Karma: 109
my threads
Feb 4 2010 5:11AM
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Sharpbrick
Posts: 133 - Karma: 20
that has happened to me too
Feb 4 2010 9:05AM
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KQuells
Posts: 82 - Karma: 26
You: Not knowing how to spell "buried" (looking like an idiot).

Some of these quotes are funny, but most are claims/ trying to look cool. Also, someone being friendly but misinformed is no reason to be a dick to them. That's why we get a bad rap sometimes. Educate people, don't make some snide comment or ignore them.
Feb 5 2010 1:09PM
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Cincher
Posts: 3403 - Karma: 535
I don't act like dick to them. Most don't. It's just that some of them are so baffling I get thought freeze and don't know what to say.
Feb 5 2010 1:14PM
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E.FARR
Posts: 1297 - Karma: 25
friend: dude why do you wear such big jackets?
me: idk..there comfy and i just like big jackets..
friend: dude you just tryin to be like shaun walsh... such a poser
me: shaun walsh?
friend: yea shaun walsh!
me: you mean tom wallisch?
friend: yea yea watever it is...
me: dude u just crossed shaun white..and tom wallisch....

how do you even do that??
Feb 5 2010 4:51PM
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Jimmy.
Posts: 2888 - Karma: 27
my friend tried to convince me simon dumont is the best freestyle skier yesterday. i tried to sway his opinion, but he wouldn't hear of it and kept bringing up his double frontflip.
Feb 5 2010 5:06PM
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stanny
Posts: 144 - Karma: 44
so i jump in the singles line and get on a lift with an old instuctor. prolly about 50.
gaper instructer- "i see u have those doubled-tipped skis. do you do those jumps?"
me- "ya"
gaper instructor- " do you do those rails too?"
me - "yup"
gaper instructor- " ya i dont do that kinda stuff but i heard that u are supposed to turn sideways when you go on a rail"

Feb 5 2010 9:14PM
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HTTT
Posts: 19 - Karma: 15
hahahahahahahahhhaah
Feb 5 2010 11:23PM
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chardi
Posts: 5040 - Karma: 59
I was watching the x games and my dad called the superpipe a windtunnel....
Feb 5 2010 11:37PM
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garygohard
Posts: 1463 - Karma: 2,871
haha good stuff
Feb 5 2010 11:48PM
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HTTT
Posts: 19 - Karma: 15
fasho man. but theyre still fun to laugh at. i love gapers personally cause they provide entertainment and the money that keeps my town from going under
Feb 6 2010 1:11AM
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HTTT
Posts: 19 - Karma: 15
fasho man. but theyre still fun to laugh at. i love gapers personally cause they provide entertainment and the money that keeps my town from going under
Feb 6 2010 1:15AM
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Ryan*
Posts: 1827 - Karma: 1,195
^Can't find the post you quoted so I'll just pretend I quoted it, and then respond to it:

Laughing on here about the funny things that gapers say is harmless enough, and its funny, but it's when we give them attitude to their faces that it starts being assholish. 

Example: When I was 12, I tried to drop into the pipe at Stratton, and I cut this guy off (not knowing any better)...he screamed at me, started flipping out about how I was retarded and all this shit...never went back into a park for 3 more years because I was convinced that everyone in there were assholes and scary people.  Had that not happened, I probably would shred today because I would've been skiing in the park for 4 years by now. 

We don't want to discourage kids from joining our sport.  Educate, don't deprecate.
Feb 6 2010 9:39AM
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FTT
Posts: 4 - Karma: 21
This used to happen alllll the time...

Gaper: **while looking at my Dumonts from two seasons back** "Did you lose one of your ski's and now have to ski with one from one pair and one from another?"
Feb 6 2010 10:56AM
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Zoro
Posts: 1253 - Karma: 37

i hate wearing my level 1 tee in public cause i always get things like wtf is level 1 and arent you on level 2 yet?

i was on the lift at vail and a guy asked me what kind of skis i had.  i told him they were armadas.  hey goes: isnt that a hotel?  i just kind of laughed and told him no

last week my friend wanted to give me a pair of his Bolle goggles so i could get them signed at xgames.

Feb 7 2010 12:13AM
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Ian.D
Posts: 1254 - Karma: 1,093
Just messing around in the park one day when a gaper comes up to me and says:

"Dude sick boardslide. I didnt know skiers could do those. Hey man, this kid can do boardslides on his skis!"
Feb 7 2010 1:22AM
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Ian.D
Posts: 1254 - Karma: 1,093
Also, I whenever I talk about the some new double or some sick trick to my friends in school, people will always hear me and say

gaper- "Yo did you see simon dumonts trick in x games last year. Dude its crazy watch it on youtube. He does like two frontflips and acts like superman in the air."

me- "did you see jon olson or pk hunder they did cool tricks too"

gaper- " no who the fuck are those guys... simon dumont is way cooler."

*no hate to dumont, just pointing put gapers obsession with him
Feb 7 2010 1:31AM
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j_hamborg
Posts: 560 - Karma: 745
As I was getting on the lift today the lifty was like hey! secure loose items! pointing at my snowpants...
Feb 7 2010 11:22PM
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ABH
Posts: 309 - Karma: 11
Some kid on his snowboard was telling his girlfriend on skis that skiers hate powder. It snowed 28 inches the night before. I just agreed with him.
Feb 7 2010 11:29PM
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~auddie~
Posts: 757 - Karma: 24
My lil bro got on a lift with a complete gaper, gaper turned to my lil bro and asked, are there any blacks on this mountain? My brother replied "No I don't think black people do snow sports they're not acclimatized"
Feb 8 2010 12:03AM
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Mike.Steezze
Posts: 407 - Karma: 17
That truly gave me an lol moment. I work at a hill and we have 2 black guys who are regulars
Feb 8 2010 12:57AM
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rickroller
Posts: 2468 - Karma: 483
"when the snow melts you can use them as water skis"
 hahahahahahahah
Feb 8 2010 1:05AM
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Ryan*
Posts: 1827 - Karma: 1,195
The funny thing is, non-buoyancy aside, he's probably right
Feb 8 2010 1:08AM
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Mike.Steezze
Posts: 407 - Karma: 17
They are great for doing what we call the slush cup here, you try to glide over a pond of water at the bottom of the hill on the last day of skiing, if you make it big prizes. But for behind a boat edges on waterskis = death.
Feb 8 2010 1:31AM
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remove
Posts: 2566 - Karma: 1,026

pretty much an awe fest in the lift line while we were waitng. One of my friends has a pair of lizzies that always gets comments about how wide they are, another has moment reno jibs and people ask about the square tips, and when bored or when people start riding on my back tips in the lift line i start buttering.

HOLY SHIT HIS SKIS ARE GONNA BREAK! pretty much hear this on a daily basis. Pretty much just a lot of random ass comments

Feb 8 2010 8:49PM
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swagburg
Posts: 798 - Karma: 4,706
i got a good one from this morning at school

kid[talking to other kid]: ya my first really big jump was when i was 7. but for some reason there was a rail behind it!
Feb 8 2010 8:53PM
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WaffleSteeze
Posts: 18 - Karma: 10
Fuck now i feel like i copied this thread cuz i just made one without seeing this one and its one above this one
Feb 8 2010 8:54PM
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03gade
Posts: 856 - Karma: 3,263
noone ever says stupid shit to me..... i wish i had something to contribute....
Feb 8 2010 9:10PM
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remove
Posts: 2566 - Karma: 1,026
then don't post
Feb 8 2010 9:11PM
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WaffleSteeze
Posts: 18 - Karma: 10
A gaper one day asked me what we did with all the man made snow and i told her that it ws underground storage
Feb 8 2010 9:15PM
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