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I was planning on a quick bite on the ... french fries is a foil bag in my pocket and ketchup in a foam cup
lifty- no drinks allowed on the lift dude
me- yeah there is and its not a drink its ket-
lifty- -throw it away
me- no and its not even a drink its ketch-
dumass stops the lift
lifty- throw it away or you dont ride MY lift
me - listen here asshole this isnt ur lift and im getting on it with my fries and ketchup
lifty- get out of line and eat and when ur done u can get on
me- fuck you turn the lift back on
dumass grts his walky talky out and says -get out of line or I call ski patrol
me- dude im a fucking instructor I have more seniority than you and definitly more hygene skills
lifty-well then I call the manager
me the person who is on a first name bases with the manager- haha haha you go ahead and do that and then you can kiss ur bum ass job good bye and go back on welfare
lifty- whats ur name
me - ***** fucking ******
lifty - I have ***** ****** and he is being insubordinate
me- easy with the big words
lifty- step out of line and wait for ***** (manager)
me- Ill wait here
the line backs up pretty far then a ski patroller comes and asks the problem (he happens to be my co-workers dad)
ski patrol- whats the problem
lifty- (rambles on and blows it out of proportion)
ski patrol- ***** is that what happened
me - no (I tell him what actually went down)
ski patrol- haha haha haha haha haha haha .... ****** (manager) said it wasnt worth his time to deal with but you have to tell him this. dude (lifty) enjoy ur last day of work ... look at this line its a mile long over a rule that doesnt even exist haha haha haha
lifty - but they throw their garbage off the lift
I got on skied down told the manager he thought it was funny but was pissed at the lifty then me and a bunch of friends got lunch trays and lunch then got on his lift he had already got chewed out on the walky talky (another lifty told me about it later) wouldnt make eye contact with me. He got fired. moral dont fuck with me
hahahah
also: "I love skiing backwards in case you didn't notice"
gaper- dude i ski too and i just bought myself some new skis
me- thats sick. what kind?
gaper- i dunno but theyre parabolic
Im asian so sometimes i like to talk in an asian accent, being a "gaper" myself,
me(to a gaper downloading): why you go down da rift?!?
her: i just dont like the conditions up here, im not used to skiing in deep snow.
(fresh courderoy had been laid overnight, hadnt snowed in a week and a half)
im just chillin and crusin toward the park...
gaper: (flags me down) hey can you help me with my ski?
me: whats wrong?
gaper: my boot wont fit in my binding anymore. it was workin earlier and i fell and now i think they're broken.
(the ski was facing backwards and he was tryin to put his boot in forwards.)
me: (reach down, pick up ski and pretnd to "fix" the binding and put the ski back down facin forward)
me: here ya go chief, try that.
gaper (clicks in) thanks mister,
me: sure (ski off laughing)
I just had a conversation with a gaper at school today.
gaper- so, you ski?
me- yea, do you
gaper-yea i love skiing
me-what skis do you have?
gaper- I dont know
me- um, okay
gaper-do you use poles?
me-yes
gaper-poles are for squares.
I laughed for a full minute.
i was cliff jumping with a friend over the summer and he pulls a gainer and these people from NYC yell out OH MY GOD HE JUST DID A DOUBLE BACKFLIP! so we get up on top and they asked if we ever got hurt doing " thoses flippy things", and we then told them that we get paid to do this and we are jsut having fun messin around.(claim). then we convinced a big fat guy to dive off the top of the cliff and he got fucked up.
