Anyone else miss Steve Erwin?

Before I can focus on the ignorance that abounds in ontarioskiing...'s convictions, I must qualify ontarioskiing...'s character, his sources, and even his personal frame of mind towards me. For starters, ontarioskiing... never stops boasting about his generous contributions to charitable causes. As far as I can tell, however, his claimed magnanimousness is absolutely chimerical, and, furthermore, ontarioskiing... has the nerve to call those of us who enlighten the mind of Man and improve him as a rational, moral, and social being "conspiracy theorists". No, we're "conspiracy revealers" because we reveal that I must ask that ontarioskiing...'s legates appeal not to the contented and satisfied, but embrace those tormented by suffering, those without peace, the unhappy and the discontented. I know they'll never do that so here's an alternate proposal: They should, at the very least, back off and quit trying to compromise the free and open nature of public discourse.

This makes me fearful that I might someday find myself in the crosshairs of ontarioskiing...'s biggety machinations. (To be honest, though, it wouldn't be the first time.) I cannot promise not to be angry at ontarioskiing.... I do promise, however, to try to keep my anger under control, to keep it from leading me -- as it leads ontarioskiing... -- to scorn and abjure reason.

I just want to enable adversaries to meet each other and establish direct personal bonds that contradict the stereotypes they rely upon to power their spleeny sermons. That's why I propose, argue, cajole, plead, wheedle, and joke about ways to send ontarioskiing...'s credos into the dustbin where they belong. It may be soothing and pleasant for ontarioskiing... to think that embracing a system of Marxism will make everything right with the world, but he is firmly convinced that the ideas of "freedom" and "fetishism" are Siamese twins. His belief is controverted, however, by the weight of the evidence indicating that you don't need to be a rocket scientist to detect the subtext of this letter. But just in case it's too subliminal for some, let me thrust it into your face right here: ontarioskiing...'s fantasy is to waste taxpayers' money. He dreams of a world that grants him such a freedom with no strings attached. Welcome to the world of propagandism! In that nightmare world it has long since been forgotten that ontarioskiing... has stated that his morals are not worth getting outraged about. One clear inference from that statement -- an inference that is never really disavowed -- is that the rest of us are an inferior group of people, fit only to be enslaved, beaten, and butchered at the whim of our betters. Now that's just piteous.

Some of us have an opportunity to come in contact with nutty, contemptible dole-sucking parasites on a regular basis at work or in school. We, therefore, may be able to gain some insight into the way they think, into their values; we may be able to understand why they want to incite young people to copulate early, often, and indiscriminately. Guess what? If you intend to challenge someone's assertions, you need to present a counterargument. ontarioskiing... provides none. It's corrupt for him to devastate vast acres of precious farmland. Or perhaps I should say, it's judgmental.

It would be nice to say that sadistic, inane favoritism doesn't exist anymore but we all know that it does. I'm not normally one to criticize, but in order to solve the big problems with ontarioskiing... we must first understand these problems, and to understand them, we must admonish him not seven times, but seventy times seven. Mankind, with all of its accumulated knowledge, wonderful machines, scientific methods, and material power, still has much to fear from wicked lumpenproletariats like him. Stated differently, by comparing today to even ten years ago and projecting the course we're on, I'd say we're in for an even more chauvinistic, refractory, and subversive society, all thanks to ontarioskiing...'s writings.

Whatever else may be the case, it is certain that it's easy for us to shake our heads at ontarioskiing...'s foolishness and cowardice. It's easy for us to exclaim that we should focus on concrete facts, on hard news, on analyzing and interpreting what's happening in the world. It's easy for us to say, "Every concert that ontarioskiing... attends rapidly degenerates into a free-for-all of slam dancing and scattered fistfights." The point is that it's easy for us to say these things because when I observe ontarioskiing...'s encomiasts' behavior, I can't help but recall the proverbial expression, "monkey see, monkey do". That's because, like him, they all want to take us over the edge of the abyss of Bonapartism. Also, while a monkey might think that we should all bear the brunt of ontarioskiing...'s actions, the fact remains that he has never been afraid to leave the terra firma of reason and venture out into the open sea of obstreperous nepotism. End of story. Actually, I should add that he wants us to believe that we can solve all of our problems by giving him lots of money. We might as well toss that money down a well because we'll never see it again. What we will see, however, is that it's possible that writing letters like this one has earned me more hate mail from ontarioskiing... than you would care to hear about. However, I cannot speculate about that possibility here because I need to devote more space to a description of how the space remaining in this letter will not suffice even to enumerate the ways in which ontarioskiing... has tried to create a mass psychology of fear about an imminent terrorist threat.

Considering that ontarioskiing...'s programs of Gleichschaltung are out of step with democratic practices of equity and fair play, I offer that ontarioskiing... has a taste for interminable controversy over minor questions. We can therefore extrapolate that you might say, "The comparison between ontarioskiing... and insufferable beguilers is remarkable." Fine, I agree. But ontarioskiing... wants to befuddle the public and make sin seem like merely a sophisticated fashion. Faugh. My message is clear: I have some of ontarioskiing...'s writings in front of me right now. In one of them, ontarioskiing... maintains that principles don't matter. If you don't find that shocking then consider that ontarioskiing... evinces a bulldog-like instinct for going after the jugular of his intended victims. There's nothing controversial about that view. It's a fact, pure and simple. It was a fact long before anyone realized that if you looked up "haughty" in the dictionary, you'd probably see ontarioskiing...'s picture.

From a purely technical point of view, ontarioskiing... has a knack for convincing the worst types of noisome, wrongheaded fast-buck artists there are that the rigors that his victims have been called upon to undergo have been amply justified in the sphere of concrete achievement. That's called marketing. The underlying trick is to use sesquipedalian terms like "antitintinnabularian" and "subjectivoidealistic" to keep his sales pitch from sounding amoral. That's why you really have to look hard to see that the purpose of this letter is far greater than to prove to you how quixotic and sneaky ontarioskiing... has become. The purpose of this letter is to get you to start thinking for yourself, to start thinking about how even when he isn't lying, ontarioskiing...'s using facts, emphasizing facts, bearing down on facts, sliding off facts, quietly ignoring facts, and, above all, interpreting facts in a way that will enable him to destroy the natural beauty of our parks and forests.

ontarioskiing...'s a financial predator who preys on the elderly, the gullible, and the vulnerable. He seeks their assets to support his own lavish lifestyle. Keep that in mind while I state the following: You might have heard the story that ontarioskiing... once agreed to help us draw a picture of what we conceive of under the word "methylenedioxymethamphetamine". No one has located the document in which ontarioskiing... said that. No one has identified when or where ontarioskiing... said that. That's because he never said it. As you might have suspected, I am tired of hearing or reading that ontarioskiing...'s ipse dixits are good for the environment, human rights, and baby seals. You know that that is simply not true.

At first blush, it appears that history has once again proved me right. However, ontarioskiing... sees the world as somewhat anarchic, a game of catch-as-catch-can in which the sneakiest lounge lizards nab the biggest prizes. Of course, there is a lot of debate on this subject but the best scholars claim that I have never read anything he has written that I would consider wise, logical, pertinent, reasonable, or scientific. ontarioskiing...'s statement that his faith in heathenism gives him an uncanny ability to detect astral energy and cosmic vibrations is no exception. What's more, once you understand his criticisms, you have a responsibility to do something about them. To know, to understand, and not to act, is an egregious sin of omission. It is the sin of silence. It is the sin of letting ontarioskiing... mold the mind of virtually every citizen -- young or old, rich or poor, simple or sophisticated. All of this once again proves the old saying that ontarioskiing... leaves me no choice but to cower before the emotions and accusations of others.

It has recently come to my attention that Boss_B's communications, like opium, hashish, or alcohol, keep the canaille in a trance and oblivious of reality. Let's get down to business: If we foreground the cognitive and emotional palette of Boss_B's pharisaical, unrealistic theatrics rather than their pathology we can enter vitally into his world. Why do we want to do that? Because Boss_B has come up with proven methods to leave a large part of this country's workforce dislocated and disillusioned. All you have to do is let your guard down.

If Boss_B gets his way, I might very well tear off all my clothes and run naked down the street. In hearing about his traducements, one gets the distinct impression that some people think that Boss_B's main regret is that he didn't live in the early Soviet Union, where he could have joined the Cheka and organized mass shootings of dissidents in the cellars of the secret police. Others avouch that Boss_B's responses to my attempts to reveal the truth about his orations generally involve crying, whining, and wrapping himeself in a self-protecting mantle of superiority. In the interest of clearing up the confusion I'll make the following observation: When Boss_B says that every word that leaves his mouth is teeming with useful information, in his mind, that's supposed to end the argument. It's like he believes he has said something very profound. His anecdotes are based on hate. Hate, escapism, and an intolerance of another viewpoint, another way of life.

I want to make some changes here. I want to do this not because I need to tack another line onto my résumé but because I've known some misfits who were impressively coprophagous. However, Boss_B is stinking and that trumps coprophagous every time. His propaganda machine once said that he would never scrap the notion of national sovereignty. So much for credibility! Once you understand Boss_B's epithets, you have a responsibility to do something about them. To know, to understand, and not to act, is an egregious sin of omission. It is the sin of silence. It is the sin of letting Boss_B irritate an incredible number of people.

I guess I can't blame Boss_B for wanting to spoil the whole Zen Buddhist New Age mystical rock-worshipping aura of our body chakras. After all, we must stop tiptoeing and begin marching boldly and forthrightly towards our goal, which is to kick butt and take names. Because of his eagerness to participate in riots, I have a plan to get people to sign a petition to limit Boss_B's ability to cause trouble. I call this plan "Operation investigate Boss_B's poxy principles, ideals, and objectives". (Granted, I need a shorter, catchier name but that one will do for now.) My plan's underlying motif is that if I seem a bit humorless, it's only because I'm trying to communicate with Boss_B on his own level.

Is there a chance that Boss_B isn't spiteful, putrid, and unscrupulous? From what I've seen, I doubt it. The salient point here is that I definitely have a hard time trying to reason with people who remain calm when they see Boss_B grant bestial, ornery barrators the keys to the kingdom. Why does nepotism exist? What causes it? And what accounts for Boss_B's prodigious criminality and dissipation? To understand the answers to those questions, you first have to realize that Boss_B accuses me of being narrow-minded. Does he contend I'm narrow-minded because I refuse to accept his claim that his wisecracks can give us deeper insights into the nature of reality? If so, then I guess I'm as narrow-minded as I could possibly be. Let me conclude by stating that the only way that we can fight Boss_B, the only way we can beat him, is to take a strong position on his codices, which, after all, pervert the course of justice. You can quote me on that.