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Dumbest thing ever said to you on a ski mtn
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ok so this seemed like a good idea now that im laughing at what some guy said to me a few weeks ago ok....
so im in the gondola by myself cuz we take singles to get to the top faster and this is what some old guy says to me
old guy:
" so whats up with your skis they have two rounded tips"
me: "yea they are twin tips i ride in the park"
oldguy: "huh then why are they so damn long, those are the longest skiblades i have ever seen"
ok so i didnt really know what to say i tried to explain to him and not be pissed at the same time but i couldnt get any real words out of my mouth exept "wow you're a fucking retard" so if anyone asks why your skiblades are super long just tell them they are retarded and to die in a fire i guess
oh by the way they are full size twin tips not snowblades if anyone gets confused
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that's not very dumb, it's a legit question
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"Get your skateboard off my skis"
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i suppose depends on preference, hes shitting on line saying there horrible skis.
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I got that the other day by a pudgy young boarder.
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But you have a line icon?
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Once i was doing butters and just spinning on this little flat part and this girl with her dad is like diad i'm gonna try that and the dad was like ok the girl trys to 180 and fals straight on her face i felt bad but it was so funny
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to the top lets get some more good stories
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The other day I was doing a nose stand while waiting for my boarder friends to undo bindings for the lift, some young kid comes up to me and asks me if my skis will break in half if i stand like that.
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Today I went past the cone in line waiting for the lift, and the lifty told me he was going to cut my head off. then he said he was going to rip my pass off after.
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hahaha i bet he was blazed as shit, i couldnt imagine a lifty saying they are gonna cut my head off.
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today i was standing at the top of this cornis (sp?) and my tips were over the edge cuz i was about to drop in, and this gaper lady was traversing across right below the cornis, she stops and goes "are you going down" no stupid bitch, i was planning on hiking up the hill
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Not really the dumbest, but still pretty funny. I was at killington on saturday, and i was going up the south ridge triple, and there were very few people on the lift, and very few people on the trail direclty below it. So this mom skis by with a little kid on a leash, and i just yell "HEY MOMM" and she turned her head sooooooo quickly to look directly at me, where my friend and i are cracking up
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"did your parents buy you that suit because you got lost alot as a child"
"No i bought it because i think its funny when retards like you ask dumbass questions"
i have the lime green oakley set up
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haha i would have said the same exact thing
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theres a run you can see going up a lift at my mountain called Caper. someone put a sticker on the "C" so the run is Gaper.
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ahhahahhahahhah ilove it.
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i was hitting this hip doing a shifty thingy to switch down the side
and then skied switch then stopped where the wait for the next jump was
and this snowboarder said "you know your not supposed to go backwards"
i was the only skier there who skied switch
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at least half of the people at gore mountain are hard core gapers, and over 9/10 of them insist on pronouncing the word gondola wrong. its gondola. not gondOHla. why do they stress the OH? is it the new cool thing for 40 year old noobs or are they just dumb?
and yes this pisses me off far more than it should
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i think gOndola, or gondOHla are both acceptable
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my friend says, "Dude that chick is sooo hott!"
I reply " Umm HIS name is Jon Olsson. Glad you like guys Colton."
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hhhhhhhaaaaaaaa your friends a queer mo
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some lady claimed we spit on her from the lift behind her today. the patrol just laughed at her
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We were explaining why gapers should not be in the park to these people on the chair because its dangerous for every one and they told us if we could wear baggy pants and that gay suit they could do what ever they wanted. my friend sitting next to me was wearing a lime green axis suit.
Heavnly's aprk is dangerous first off and gapers go and try to hit shit or the sides of it and die.
life 6 people were carted out of the park today, all gapers.
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that would be i, and to be fair those kids could freestyle pretty well, but besides that they were just punks.
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i am that friend and if he was a decent size i would have, but they were easily 4 years younger than my self and i decided that hitting little kids is not ok. especially when your on a mountain, fat kids tend to roll and he might roll all the way down and hit a tree.
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Haha, I love this thread...
Wasn't exactly at the mountain, but I was watching Shanghai Six while some family was over and my uncle came in and sat down to watch it with me. I forget who it was, but someone grabbed mute and he asked "I think those backscratchers look so cool, can you do that?" I also love when you're watching ski movies with people who don't know much about the sport and are quiet the whole time untiln someone does a back flip and they're like "Wow! That was so cool!"
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I have a whole new lower level of respect for those snowboard gapers that freak out getting off the lift...ARE YOU GOING LEFT OR RIGHT?!???!!????
I snowboarded for the first time saturday, and it isn't AT ALL hard to get off the lift. I always assumed it was difficult becuase so many people fall all over the place getting off the lift on snowboards.
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i was at squaw and these kid in t-shirts and bandanas, mostly no poles, they kept yelling about how i needed to help them combine rollerblading and skiing and said to "drop my poles before they beat da shit out me" then they started freestyling so i got out. the one guy was yelling about "showing respekt next time" to me as i skied off.
i saw them later following these 8 year olds on snowboards filming them.
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Last night on the lift I was sitting with my friend and these kids on snowboards got on with us. One of the kids (after we finished talking to each other about whatever it was, what run we wanted to take next or something) turns and says to me, "so, are those like, easy?" pointing at my skis. I just kind of sat there not knowing what to say.
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i think you mighta ran inot lil g on the mountain. you gotta watch out for his thizzin face tho. itll get ya everytime
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some guy asks y we were skiing switch
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gONdUHlas are the things u ride in the canals in venice gondOHlas are the lifts, at least that's what i say
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ive got trick skis-skiblader
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haha i had a ski racer tell me hes sponcersized by burton in a gondola, he thought he was being funny or hes just retarted
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the shop i work at rents the head big easy. maybe 70mm underfoot though im not sure. anyways a 12 year old came in a couple weeks ago and told me that we shouldn't be renting skis that were so wide.
also last weekend i was riding with my friend who is afraid of heights and always brings the bar down. she said 'bar' and paused, then brought it down and lightly hit the guy next to her on the head. he flips a shit and starts screaming at us and swearing saying that we never said anything meanwhile his headphones of totally ghetto street music is blasting. i kindly suggest to him that he should calm down and maybe turn his music down so he can hear people in the future, and he gets even angrier, and proceeds to elbow her for the rest of the ride. finally when he gets off, he does a gaper tuck off the lift and in an snowplows away in a rage.
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i would have knocked his ass out soooo fucking fast, what a douchebag.
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one time i was skiing and some guy asked me if i skiied or snowboard and i was like "i ride a frekin sled down the mountain"
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Its not because they were stupid, its because they were both women...
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I saw a bunch of gaper/old people with non season passes standing next to a line of jibs at PC and I did some cool tricks on them pretzels and stuff then as I was skiing off one of them yelled crazy double tippers in the skateboard park...
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tie between
"holy cow did u see how high he went out of the half pike!"
and
"whats the point in thoes stairs, you get to the top and theres nothing there its not like anyones gunna walk up them or down so they could get rid of thoes railings too." sum one talking about the sundayriver stair set.
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Whenever I see little kids skiing backwards I always tell them that they can't ski backwards just to mess around.
And my mom called the pipe a half pike for like 10 years.
And whenever I tell my Dad about my day skiing he always asks if I did a molly with a twist.
And then one time at sunday river this guy said that he did a 720 with a 580 flip and went down hard.
And my final story was this guy I rode up the lift with who was like 40 or so and had a real strong boston accent. And he told me that he saw some kid do a double helicopter. And that he wears a helmet because if he fell without it he would be "friggin done"
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hey im here to get my dynastar public enemys, idk what happened it just came out
or you cant take my pass asshole you dont work here, that was a good one too, and yea he worked there, but he didnt take my pass what a nice guy
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-what kind of skis do you have?
-they're blue.
the invariable attempted conversation with the strange species femalius gaperus
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some old people said they sdhould move the terrain park because its beside the chair and people might fly and hit the chairlift
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Ohhh God, haha, definitely know that feeling.
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