Replying to The No Poles Thread to End All No Poles Threads: An Essay by Mr. WiRipper2

Ladies and gentlemen, I am a believer.

Yesterday, I was at my local gnar shredding organization Alpine Valley, in Kewaskum Wisconsin. I have having what i could only describe as a shitty ass day. Every 270 i did i landed on my ass, my jumps were not dialed, and i was jusy generally not confident at all.

It was at this exact time, as i was crusing down the park, that i remembered the video on Film the Idea website of andy and pep at park city. it was the most stylish video i had seen in a while. then i realized that the thing that made it stylish and sick and original was the fact that these two world class freeskiers werent using poles.

with visions of pep fuja's hands-in-his-pockets-no-poles-nosepress dancing in my head, i dropped my poles in the left line and skated up to the loading zone. i got on the lift, feeling naked without my once necessary poles.

what a surprise that day was. skiing without poles was the most fun i have had skiing in my entire life. i just felt so, free, uninhibited, and, though you may think the opposite, i felt as steezy as samuel l jackson nigga. immediatley after dropping me poles, all my tricks were automatically dialed, as if by magic. spinning on and off of rails felt so natural and easy without 3 foot pieces of aluminum on my hands, aand i was able to hold my grabs for what seemed like hours on my spins.

kids, all of you that respond to a no poles thread with a resounding "no poles? gay faggot homo shit fucker penis licker" are about to have your lives changed. dont worry, i was one of you. i always thought that without poles, I would feel awkward and un stylie. in fact, i felt the exact opposite. so next time youre out on the hill and youre not feeling it so much, drop those useless sticks in the lift line. youll be glad you did.