Dear hippies,
I think its time we talked.
There is no snow, because youre hippies and the snow gods hate hippies.
Global warming is gods way of hating on tree hugging mountain lovers. Im sorry things ended up this way, I truley am. Cause I knwo your cause is a great and noble one. Saving the planet one day at a time... buying heavily chemicaled fuel to power your way to the mountain where you clear cut trees, and disrupt migration patterns. Its a shame that ice melts, it really is. Its a shame that the earth warms and cools over time in a sort of cycle. its a shame that greenhouse emissions are speeding up the process, but look at it this way...
the faster we get to the hot part, the faster we get to the cold part!
Its also a shame that the hippies are winning... sure having our mountains run on solar and wind power where possible is a fantastic idea, and no water toilets are all the rage. But I want a hotdog and a coke for lunch, not an all natural penguin and porpoise free tuna salad samwich for 11 bux with some wheatgrass. I love my snow, I love my nature and I love my mountains too... but oh dear hippies, please learn the wisdom of knowing what is beyond your control. Because the next time one of you gets in my face about me spitting my gum out off the chairlift, then drives home in your '81 accord with no muffler, turns on your fire place, cranks the heat, and does whateevr else you hippocrates do, I will fuck your shit up... and then blame it on global warming.
I hope you find happyness, you smelly, sheepish hippies.
Pigletpen.