Replying to A Break with my girlfriend

ok this is kind of weird but I have been with my girlfriend since September, and she just had finals so for the past month she has been really busy with finals, so I didnt really get to see her much.

after her last final I spent the night with her and triedd to have sex with her and she was really confusing. she said that we should have a break from each other. then about 10 minutes later she asked me if I wanted to have sex to which I answered yes and then she just threw it back in my face saying that she was just an object to me and that I didnt love her and alot of mean things undermining all the love I have for her.

yesterday she asked me to come over to help her clean her place, I agreed and made shure she remembered we were on a break. so I go over to her place, clean her kitchen while she cleaned her room,

after that she tried to have sex with me and I refused (not because I didnt want too, I wanted too more than anything) but because I though it was better if we didnt. she said she really wanted to have sex with me but I kept on telling her no (I went down on her to make her feel better.)

so now she is back on the break thing and she is going up to Tahoe for the rest of the month for X-mas and new years.

would I be a horrible person if I went to parties and met someone else while she was gone?

its the second time shes done this and it just seems like everytime the relationship is rolling along fine she pulls the E-brake its really frustrating. especially when all I want to do is make her happy.