Another reason why america is so great

For any of you who don't know who George Pataki is then well you probly don't live in New York. He is our lets raise taxes and do nothing else governer. Here is an article by Jeff Kramer, a collumnist for our local paper.

Like millions of Americans, I had one burning question following this week's Democratic election: Does Gov. George Pataki still have a chance to be president?

Here's one humor columnist who desperately hopes the answer is yes. That's why I hit the phones Wednesday - less than 24 hours after the polls closed - and began harassing, I mean contacting, random voters in Iowa on behalf of the only sitting governor thinking about running for president who has the middle name Elmer.

"Good evening," I intoned in my most syrupy telephone solicitor voice. "I'm calling in support of New York State Gov. George Pataki, a possible candidate for president in 2008. Would you mind if I ask you a few questions?"

Many Iowans did mind. They hung up on me, which is to be expected. It's been a long campaign season, and most Americans are sick of people like me intruding on their dinner hour. It's so rude.

Amazingly, though, about a half-dozen random Iowans agreed to talk to me, evidence that Iowa is either incredibly polite or incredibly bored.

Here's one exchange:

Me: "On a scale of 1 to 5, how likely are you to vote for Gov. Pataki for president?"
Iowan: "I'd have to know more about him."
Me: "What sorts of things would you need to know?"
Iowan: "I suppose what political party he is."

Not to worry. It's not as bleak for Pataki as it sounds. Remarkably, the respondent described himself as somewhat likely to vote for Pataki even though he doesn't know who Pataki is. That suggests that Pataki can win Iowa by doing nothing, a strategy he has honed magnificently in this state.

"He doesn't seem to be visible or talked about," another random Iowan told me. "I just sense he's not about getting to the people. I hear nothing about him. Nothing about what he's doing. He doesn't seem to want to get his face out there and be likable."

Brilliant!

My phone canvassing uncovered another pocket of Iowans who could help Pataki - people who want marijuana legalized. My conversation with one such person, Curtis Smith, a 43-year-old father of three in Des Moines, got off to an awkward start when he asked me, "Why should he (Pataki) be president?"

"I don't know," I said.

Curtis laughed.

"Well, Bud, you're the one calling me. And you don't know why he should be president?"

It was the most embarrassing moment of my life.

But the interview came around. Curtis, a Democrat and a construction worker, told me his back hurts every night. Marijuana relaxes it, but he stopped using it because he feared getting arrested. He was hitting the Jack Daniel's and Coke instead when I called.

"Bud, I'm telling you from the heartland of the country, you get a man who says, 'I'll legalize marijuana,' and I guarantee he'll be the next president."

On the hunch that Curtis is actually on to something, I've come up with a bumper sticker slogan:

George Pataki: Because America Is Going to Pot.