small talk

I step into an elevator so stuffed with silence
Even talk this small might snap the fragile cable in two
And we’re clearing our throats and checking the time and saving our breath for
more important appointments like
Asking for directions to the Adult Video uptown
And, besides,
If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s not to talk to
Strangers
Cause the culture-shock might come in the form of a heart-ache or the pigeon
running in circles just searching for a place to lay her egg, no,
Instead,
We shield ourselves with magazine covers just covered in urgent headlines and a
promise of distraction from the fraction-of-a-second that might change our lives
forever from the
Constant threat to sever our connection to the urban world where a man in a three-
piece-suit can’t spare a smile for a
Sixteen
Year
Old
Girl
Where we earn our wages taking pages and screening phone calls till the damn thing
threatens to ring right off the wall meanwhile seeking refuge under our desks
scratching at instant lottery tickets with our teeth
That’s a gambling addiction worth $17.75 a week, still
we have to play the game just this once on the odd change that it’ll come through
for us and this time maybe I’ll win the
Megabucks
So I can afford a thimble-full-of-vodka from the mini-bar and a microwave and a
compact car-
But, no, because
Less is never really more and besides
What do I need to conserve for?
Honestly, life is
Way
Too
Short
And just think about how much happier I’ll be with an SUV big enough to part this
sea of traffic and fly me back to the hotel,
Yea, there’s nothing I enjoi like a five-night-stay at the best resort,
Six hundred dollars a day
And believe me, that’s the price you pay for
Luxury
Padding down heavily carpeted stairs to the health-club filled with hungry glares
and a sauna dry enough to suck up the sound
Of a baby crying
Three-hundred-fifty feet down,
Yes,
Such is the life on the thirty-fourth floor
I’ve got X-ray vision burning right through that door I can see everything from
here, I don’t need a credit-card-key
There’s a great big bed
Fit
For a king
And a roll-away-cot where the princess can sleep
Of course, nobody told her
She’d have to bring her own
Pea
So she’s tossing and turning in the middle of the night and her swear soaks the
sheets oblivious to the climate-control breeze because
She’s dreaming of the city that’s brewing miles below the soot and the blood and
the tar and the change
Dropped into hundreds of coffee-cups
Echoing
Miles away
And she can smell the hot-dogs and the shit and the smoke and she gags into her
pillow and she tries not to choke on the thick of the people that are coated in love
just dancing on the rooftops, eyes
Glued
Above
So aware of the skyline chewing holes in the stars and the stillness obscured by the
noise of the cars but they’re still buying their flowers and writing graffiti on the
walls transforming bathroom stalls into booths
Ideal
For confession to sins so swollen with passion they were well-worth-committing
and,
Hell,
She isn’t sorry
At all
But this far up it’s impossible for most of us to imagine all the beauty and the pain
lurking right underneath our noses so we watch the mannequins strike their poses
and dig for a wallet we hope we’re gonna find buried deep in our pockets in the
back of my mind I just assume my fingers will be clutching leather when they come
up for air
So used to counting out bills they long to get tangled in my hair or bend aching
guitar strings or beat out a rhythm on the lid of a
Trash-can with one hand
Setting a whole block ablaze but
My body has forgotten how to drum its way through this maze of underground
music and politics and art so confused by consumerism we don’t know
Where to start
And I watch her grope for a blanket to pull over her legs cause she’s shivering so
violently she’s shaking the bed
And they’re ing up the prices of every label on the shelves because we’re so
eager to impress we don’t even stop to second-guess ourselves, and of course its
Fashionable
To be stamped with some rich guy’s name across your chest because all the clothes
look the same-
How else would we know one
from the next?
And I hear her whimper in restless silence and spit her hair out of her mouth
while deep below the sidewalks the subway rumbles to a stop as the people drift out
and
Disappear
Into parking lots
Yes, I understand the state-of-the-union
In God We Trust, Peaceful and Just
More than willing to worship at the feet of Lady Liberty while using poetry to fuel
the fires that lick at the lies of our Great Nation—
Yes,
I know, I’m looking too
I squeeze my eyes shut, but I still see
Straight through
And there’s no way around it-
The way has always been
Down
Now I’m trembling and swaying
Five hundred feet from the ground
Where the city’s crawling across the desert sand underneath the naked sun and
maybe I could do a rain dance up here
But no,
The damage’s already been done and
I stepped out onto this window-ledge just to see if I could get some fresh air but
I’m leaning off the edge for the forty-ninth-story and
Nobody could breathe up here
I bet somebody would try to save me if the wind weren’t blowing so hard and I
could probably climb back into this prison but my hands are full of
Tabloid-newspapers and company-stationary and a drink-coaster that says
LIVE LIFE.
…and I will
for the first time
For the last time
For the time it takes to fall four-hundred-and-ninety-feet
And when I land it’ll sound like a lucky penny hitting the pavement
Which is better than nothing because
Nothing is worse
Than stepping into an elevator so stuffed with silence even talk
This small
Might snap the fragile cable
In Two


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'More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly' -Brad Holmes