Replying to My bro's to do list before he dies

1)Protect Rihanna from a pack of angry wolves
2)Become a world renowned hitman
3)Get a colonic
4)Drink rum from a Coconut (with a lime while singing "put the lime in the coconut")
5)Single parent a goldfish
6)Bite mike Tyson's ear
7)Become a famous freestyler rapper
8)win a pie eating contest
10)Get a tattoo of Chuck Norris and Samuel L. Jackson riding into the sunset on a liger(Amythical beast bred for its magical abilities)
11)Catch and consume a wild Turkey
12)get shot 10 times to beat 50 cents record
13)Find the Dark Sorceror's cave of Elderon.( to get mana boost)
14)Sciff Ammonia and beat the crap out of Sylvester Stallone
15)get a faux hawk (hair cut)
16)Slide tackle star Jones
17)Join film actors Guild (FAG, team america)
18)Sucker punch Gibbs (NCIS)
19)Speak fluently Ancient Chinese Greek
20)Find the "Gato" in the Amazon Rainforest and free slaves from Christopher Walken
21)Gain emotional strengh to watch March of the Penguins
22)Rival Dr. Phil for interstellar domination
23)Eat 100 Peeps
24)Bring the "nines" to the top (his gang)
25)Convince myself i am pregnant so i can lactate (inside joke)