Member of the Month

partyandBS
December, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Burma Shave

profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
I came across a collection of old Burma Shave road-ads the other day.

I thought it would be fun to write a few Burma Shave-style ads about everyones favorite resort.

I will post a few to get it started.
Jan 29 2006 9:24AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Mountain open?
Mountain closed?
Hotline's broken
So no one knows
Jan 29 2006 9:24AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Season Pass,
Sure costs a lot
I'll sell you one for fifty,
Meet me in the parking lot
Jan 29 2006 9:26AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Sitzmark Sitzmark
Smells like pee
But I know the bartenders
So I drink for free
Jan 29 2006 9:26AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Larry McGingerkid
Thinks his shit don't smell
But he'll spend eternity
Sucking cocks in Hell
Feb 3 2006 7:23AM
0 0
profile picture
seandon21
Posts: 308 - Karma: 21
who are you
Feb 3 2006 2:31PM
0 0
profile picture
seandon21
Posts: 308 - Karma: 21
who are you
Feb 3 2006 2:31PM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Larry McGingerkid
At night, dresses up like a female
I know this because
I can STILL read his email
Feb 3 2006 3:17PM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
The Girdwood Rotary meets
Every wednesday night
You're welcome to attend,
As long as you're White

No Blacks, No Jews,
No Hispanics, and no one gay
Kind of looks like
The Girdwood KKK
Feb 4 2006 7:17AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Alyeska Executives
They like to swap wives
It must bring some happiness
To their meaningless lives
Feb 4 2006 7:24AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
I axed Alyeska a question,
But I didn't hear back:
"You've got 600 employees,
and not one of them is Black?"
Feb 5 2006 8:15AM
0 0
profile picture
garrett.
Posts: 9304 - Karma: 3,670
u do realize ur the only one playing right?
Feb 5 2006 9:16AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Yes, I know
Feb 5 2006 9:23AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I tapped McGingerkid's phone
And there's nothing he can do
Feb 21 2006 10:47AM
0 0
profile picture
garrett.
Posts: 9304 - Karma: 3,670
dude give up its not working
Feb 21 2006 7:42PM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Back in your closet Garrett
Feb 22 2006 12:55PM
0 0
profile picture
garrett.
Posts: 9304 - Karma: 3,670
NEVER
Feb 22 2006 8:18PM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Over hills,
Over dales,
A Theremin Bug
Never fails
Mar 21 2006 6:08PM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
You checked for fake passes,
But you couldn't find none
Perhaps it's because
I warned them not to come?
Mar 26 2006 3:28AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Perhaps you are an idiot?
Perhaps you should never have been born?
But I know one thing for certain
Girl-on-girl action
Does not qualify as 'gay porn'
Mar 26 2006 3:34AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
Barcodes are magic
Just like Penn and Teller
If we just had barcodes,
We could catch the counterfeit seller:

http://www.4shared.com/file/1095159/b2388006/fake-pass-2.html
Mar 28 2006 2:08AM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
If you get caught with a fake season pass,
Here's just what to do:
Smile, give them the finger,
And tell them the Penguin sent you



Quando podeces te regi eorum fecerunt?
Mar 28 2006 11:22AM
0 0
profile picture
Durtschi
Posts: 6897 - Karma: 1,878
these are amazing, they make me think of alyeska,where the fuck did youget them?
Apr 15 2006 1:46PM
0 0
profile picture
DrX
Posts: 72 - Karma: 10
They come from the Heart.
Apr 16 2006 2:15PM
0 0
profile picture
Mortuus
Posts: 3 - Karma: 10
http://http://lads.myspace.com/mini/mini.swf?b=MTA5OTk3OTMz&o=MzczOTcwNjA1&d=MTIwOTgzNTI5NA==&i=MzY4ODUyMTQ3&a=RmFsc2U=&u=MzY4ODUyMTQ3
May 3 2008 1:17PM
0 0
profile picture
Mortuus
Posts: 3 - Karma: 10
http://lads.myspace.com/mini/mini.swf?b=MTA5OTk3OTMz&o=MzczOTcwNjA1&d=MTIwOTgzNTI5NA==&i=MzY4ODUyMTQ3&a=RmFsc2U=&u=MzY4ODUyMTQ3
May 3 2008 1:17PM
0 0
profile picture
[~_~]
Posts: 20239 - Karma: 1,273
Jared, get off the fucking computer, quit beating off to little kids, and get a life.
Jul 26 2008 9:13PM
0 0
profile picture
SoupCurry
Posts: 1847 - Karma: 731
no billy dont get into THaT van....thats chester.....hes a molester....
Nov 9 2008 6:24PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-5)