Replying to Most ridiculous night...ever

My friends and I had a gong show night last night.

Friend One - Passed out in club bathroom after I stuck my fingers down his throat to try and pull the trigger, he couldnt do it himself

Friend Two - Rode in the trunk to the bar, got forgotten, passed out, and
called us two hours later to say 'i'm still in the trunk and i really have to piss'

Friend Three, Puked at club at midnight

Friend Four, Pissed down the stairs inside our Student Union Building, failed at climbing a fence, fell down a hill.

Friend Five - hitchhiked with a guy who said "don't worry, I'm not gonna cut your heads off or anything" and "don't worry you guys are too big to kidnap"...then later, got handcuffed for littering his McD's cup.

Friend Six - Borrowed a Street buskers violin and started serenading drunkards buying pizza at 2am in the bar district. i didnt even know he could play the violin.

Friend Seven - Dropped her pizza on the pavement, and I said "She better eat it, I paid $1.50 for it" And so she did.

Friend Eight - Fell into the bush he just pissed in, was put into a cab and then went missing. There was no reason he shouldnt be home, and it was cold out. We feared he might have caught hypothermia and be passed out in a ditch. Search parties launched, police called. 2 hours of searching. We found him in a friends house. He had crawled in the front door, locked himself in the room, put his shoes neatly against the wall, and then puked everywhere. I have actually never been so worried about someone in my life.

Friend nine - Thought the pizza guy was ripping him off, called 911 and got the police to come and settle the dispute.

Me - Embarassed, but laughing. Thank god we werent all together or we would all still be in jail. I didnt do anything except help my buddies and search for them. Thank god. I condone none of their actions.