Replying to A boarder's disease

A new disease is springing up on the slopes and has affected many snowboarders, escepcially those that stay in terrain parks. This newfound disease is called snowass, or in medical terms, snowus assus. This condition affects snowboarders and sometimes skiers that spend too much time on the ground watching others go big. Symptoms of this disease include: a large white patch on the ass, sometimes stiff and icy, A numb ass, and most serious of all, it has a tendency to make boarders' egos grow to alarming proportions. this last symptom soon dissapates however after the snowboarder in question attempts to take to the air and flails around helplessly. Snowass is a topical condition, and usually results in the sufferer being made fun of in lift lines because of the icicles hanging off the back of the jacket.
The only cure for snowass is a swift kick to the area in question, freeing the snow from the bottom of the jacket as well as getting the boarder up so he will actually get down the mountain.

this should be a disease... i'm getting so tired of the posers at the top of the terrain park. Get off your freakin ass so you can learn to board dammit!