An Honest Shanghai Six Review

I just watched it. I'm blown away. I also watched White Shine. I wasn't blown away.

Shanghai Six..what can I say. High Five rocked. But it also lacked. There was sketchy stuff. You won't find sketchy stuff in Shanghai Six. It's hard to write Shanghai really fast, it gets messy.

Vanular segment is a jawdropper. Haven't dropped my jaw on my knee that hard since the first time I saw Victoria Silvstedt naked. It was truly amazing. The instrumental was So much better than the original song with Kanye "whiny" West.All his butters, rails, switch pow landings were stomped beyond recognition, we need a pathologist here! I heard he himself was dissapointted in his part, well, he should bust some REALLY crazy stuff next year to top his SH6's part.

Travis Redd is the coolest motherfucker ever. He drops off this huge cabana. It's amazing, incredible! He's also a grabber, he likes to grab his skis and hold on like there's no tomorrow. Or landing.

John Symms killed it. Austin Ramaley killed it. Colby West killed it. Collomb-Batton killed it. Marie Martinod didn't exactly kill it, but neither did she so in White Shine. But she's pretty cute, and takes a massive fall and almost dies because she can't breathe. I'm not sure, but did I miss Luke Van Valin? I'm pretty sure I didn't even recognize him anywhere in the movie. But if he was there, he rocked!

Tanner Rainville goes crazy, his part isn't as good as I thought he'd have after Yearbook, but he goes Huge. IT'S GONNA BE HUUUUUGE!

Craig Coker. I liked his part in High Five, but it was like "well I guess he's okay". But now he's just...all around the world, and his skis are just going naa-naa-na. A rather suprisingly fantastic part, out of the fucking woodwork, I'd say.

Dave Crichton shares his ubersick rails with his FRIENDS, but I wanted so bad to see him jump. That's a big minus, Berman. He's your top dogggggggggggggggggg.

Liam Downey made my heart pulse in Forward. He barely gave me an erection with his ski porn in High Five, his style seemed too awkward to be stylish. Well, now he came back, and lays down some of the msot impressive rails I've seen, and he really cleaned up his act in the backcountry, it's like his second nature now! I absolutely love his part, Zion-I went so well with him!

And then there's mister Spence, who wants to kick it, and this asshole security guy just brushes him off. He certainly didn't know that he was talking to the great Lexington Steele. He completely CHANGED his trademark style, which has been dubbed "ugly" for many years now. Only grabbing that oldschool side safety. Well, you won't see that shit in Shanghai Six! Doublegrabs, crazy switch cork seven's with blunt grabs, BLUNT I SAY, into the sweet pow-pow. He does 270 off every rail, and those rails are fucking sick. Steele has been reborn.

Then the credits roll. You say: "What the fuck?! Already, it's been like 10 minu...oh, it's been 48 minutes. Shit..
I say: "That means that a movie has flow. Incredible, most amazing flow. The music was really different at parts, but I liked every song, it wasn't like some PBP movies, where it's every different genre of music packed together. Not a mish-mash, no no, it was a very well rounded soundtrack, and it stopped, what, once in the film? It just kept going, no stops between "sections", that's what made this movie!

BUT I have one rant. The credits. The screen is a bit too small. That's the only thing I didn't like in the movie, except Dan Marion, he has...well, his style wasn't up to par with everyone else. But the credits in the theatre was a good idea, but you have to squint to see the action. Sorry bro. And also the Harvey Dynamite video, it has some sound problems.

I found two secret sections, the FUN section and the Trailer.

I I forgot someone, I'll write more on that later. I give this movie 9½. Seriously. Vanular is just...parle Francais.

Thanks. Tell me if this review was well written, I'm studying for this English thing.