London. Paris. Berlin. Rome. Tokyo. Philly. Johannesburg. Barrie? WTF is this.
Point 1. Ottawa has the chance to secure itself as a premier city in the world by hosting the Canadian Live 8 show right on parliament hill, on July 2nd.
But our government feared it would cost too much, and would attract too many fans onto parliament hill, and turned down Geldoff by denying his request to have us as one of 8 venues.
First of all, so it would cost the government a million or two. Yes, that's alot of money. But just think, we would be regarded, worldwide, as being in the same league as Paris, London, Berlin, and Tokyo, among others. I'd say that, in conjunction with the fact that this is a relief/charity concert, concerning transnational politics, means that Ottawa should have sacked up and dug out their wallets, enabling us to have the show here.
Another worry was that too many fans would flood parliament hill for the show, because the hill would be the venue if it was indeed held here. But anyone who has been in Ottawa on Canada Day (incidentally the day before the live 8 shows, on July 1st, which allows for existing Canada Day infrastructure to be used, etc...) knows that a million Canadians flood downtown, and especially the hill, in a drunken rampage. But Ottawa has no quarrels with this strictly regional issue. Its the International fame and recognition that they must fight against.
Alas, the Canadian city decided upon was Molson Park, in Barrie, Ontario. A venue which holds no more than 35 000 people, by the way. And Barrie, with a population of merely 120 000 people, is hardly in league with any of the other 7 cities. Geldoff knows this, which is why the live 8 website and a number of international wire services report that Toronto will be the venue for Canada, even though Barrie is over 100 km away, and is clearly a completely different city than Toronto. This is an embarassment to Canada, and to the entire Live 8 network of shows.
Point 2. We have the crappiest lineup of all. Celine Dion, live via satellite from Las Vegas? Same with Bryan Adams? What, are they too good to come to Canada? If they're indeed too busy, then give other, more talented artists a time slot, rather than giving an ego boost to lazy, over-the-hill pseudo-American musicians. But all i can tell is that they're in it just to have their faces in the picture; not to donate their talents to the cause. Otherwise they'd actually show up.
And Jann Arden? The fat, lesbian whiner of a musician? Eff off. That's just downright silly. Barenaked ladies? Wow, the more and more I read my own essay, I realize that Canada sucks.
And even though the Rolling Stones will be practicing for their Canadian tour in Toronto at the time of the Live 8 shows, they will not be preforming in Barrie. Screw you too, Mick Jagger.
The biggest injustice of all? A bunch of americanesque sellouts get invites to perform, while the greatest true Canadian out there, Stompin' Tom Connors, gets left out to dry, with no invite at all.
In conclusion, I wish Canada would stop wearing our ass for a hat, and actually do something right for once. Unfortunatly, nothing really went right at all, as far as Live 8 was concerned. I just hope the embarassment will stop here.
-Joel
~Phunkin Phatt Phreerider~
Capital City Rider, DFP
Silent Army
'Everybody calls me a zero. But I'm an internet hero.'
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