Scarred for life...

k ive never actually walked in on my parents(phew), but i think this one time pretty late into the night, i got up to go to the bathroom, and their door was closed(they awlays leave it open), and i heard the headboard of the bed banging a bit and ...ahem voices.
i completely lost my will to piss and went back to bed.


also when i was little i would always see my siter going into my parents room and id be like what are you doing?
shed be like, go back to sleep bitch.
and finally, i think 2 years ago, she was like oh you still remmber that? this is what i was checking out.
we went to my aprents room and she showed me where my dad stashes the condoms. i was like oh my god gloria why did you show me that?!

ok i laughed at the first half.

the second half was disturbing.

a.) why does your dad use condoms?
b.) wait, was your sister going in and stealing condoms to use for herself?
c.) was this while they were sleeping or when they weren't home?
d.) why do i care?

wtf is going on here

Thankfully I've never seen/heard anything but my siblings have

so, i'm glad to say i've never seen or heard anything between my dad and step mom.. but apparently my sister opened the door one time and it was after a fight my mom(real mom) and dad had and she seen his ding dang doodle, and it was gross once i was sleeping at my moms house and i heard her and my step dad, goin at it... seriously scared the shit right out of me... like i had to change the sheets and everything... well maybe no the shit out of me, but deffinately scarred me for life