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I hate my damn roomate

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aggro_sk8
Posts: 2760 - Karma: 18
ok, he's pissed, and i dont know why. all he does is spray cologne on himself (and my stuff for that matter), febreezes everything in sight, throws my stuff around his room, and rearanges the room to his liking.

well, i just asked him if he pissed, and he started chewing me out. 'if were gonna live together, we gotta get some things straight... you have your stuff, i have my stuff... you dont like my music, i dont like yours... use head phones...you have a chair, i have a chair (which is actually provided by the school) so dont leave stuff on mine... you have 2 outlets, i have 2 outlets... get your own powerstrip in one week, or your gonna be unplugged (his 2 outlets are accessable) mine arent, (oh and he only uses 2 outlets in his plugs)

-he moves the room around, so i cant reach anything from my top bunk

-sleeps all day and freaks if i have guys chillin in my room or close the door too hard. (this is with his privacy sheets so he cant see any light), but then stays up late with his floodlight of a lamp on and tells me to deal with it.

-hes a fag, and everyone i know here thinks he's a pompus arrogant jackass

-thinks hes God's gift to humanity (cultured: in his fucking dreams) yet no girl will get near him, except the school's acad highschoolers

-brags about his money, and talks like he's better than everyone else

-thinks he's a worldclass allstar, except he never makes it off the bench, and the time he did, hurt his back

-steals all his comedic material from SNL

-and puts out other people for his own gain

i fuckin hate him- any suggestions (other than kill him, or rape his mom)?
-Joe
______________________________________
'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if there wasn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

Solider in the NS ARMY
Rollers of NS unite!!!
603 for life
I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21
Oct 17 2004 2:39PM
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SohCahToa
Posts: 1221 - Karma: 11
like its been said, quit being a cunt and let him know whats what.
Oct 17 2004 10:50PM
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Ski_Instructor_Mike
Posts: 6146 - Karma: 73
I think you've gotta just deal with it.
'as long as i dont leave my skates on the floor, which i do in spite of that' (you can't afford a $1 extension cord with 4 jacks on it?!) and all the other shit you're saying makes it seem like you're just trying to piss him off. basically just do nothing to piss him off. he might stop, if you're doing shit JUST to piss him off then maybe he's doing shit to JUST piss you off! maybe the late nights on the computer are his way of telling you something. but yes. if you've gotta wear headphones he should too, and all the rest. But mostly make that point obvious to him and don't just bitch about it to other people hoping the problem will solve itself because whatever you're doing to make shit better isn't working right
- Mike

'i'm guessing that when you say 'drinking', you mean you snuck one of your dad's O'Doules out of the fridge.
and by 'had sex' you mean 'beat off to an episode of The View'.' -Str8LaceFan
Oct 17 2004 10:57PM
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IrishDrink87
Posts: 1568 - Karma: 17
if it means anything...i just sent him 20+ emails about viagra, gay sex and weight loss programs...



'if the president is anything like you, atlantaski, i hope someone smacks him with a golf club and shits in his mouth.' CrystalNeedsSomething...

BUM LOVING FOR LIFE!

'If i was a slutty white chick id rather have a 14 inch beast in my twat than a 6 inch white man cock' -Lateralis
Oct 17 2004 11:38PM
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bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
talk to your RA's about getting a new roommate. tell them he smells and the stench of him is so overhelming you have to sleep in someone elses room.

or better yet, invite an RA into your room when he's acting like a prick so they can expirience it first hand.

pretty much the best thing you can do is switch rooms and leave him to his misserable life. and when you move out, steal some of his shit.



**Proud member of the d-loc fanclub**

d-loc's wit & wisdom at its best.
Oct 18 2004 11:58AM
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hotchiklover
Posts: 156 - Karma: 10
fuck him
Oct 18 2004 12:01PM
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Barmski
Posts: 4342 - Karma: 811
lights out at 3am ? baaahahahahhaha thats so classic for a college man thats funny.
___________________

Josh Barilar
Sportin' the bath robe steeze.
since 1984

NO BRIAN, its I before E except after C, an when sounding like a in a neighbor in weigh and on weekends and holidays and all through out may and you'll always be wrong no MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!

You all take luck now! You take luck and care
Oct 18 2004 12:52PM
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aggro_sk8
Posts: 2760 - Karma: 18
irishdrink87, this is the only time i'll say i love you, cause honestly, i dont, but thats hilarious

ive just decided to ignore him, and not piss him off intentionally, which i havent been doing. but, im just gonna chew him out the next time he goes over the edge

-Joe
______________________________________
'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if there wasn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

Solider in the NS ARMY
Rollers of NS unite!!!
603 for life
I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21
Oct 18 2004 1:12PM
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nothanks
Posts: 13551 - Karma: 31
dump in mymouth and get a new room



-let people do what they want, ski how you want, make whoever you want your role model its your choice
-i love to ski, so should you, its fun, try it sometime
-thats what the internet is for anonymously slandering people-jason lee
Oct 18 2004 1:17PM
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nothanks
Posts: 13551 - Karma: 31
i mean his




-let people do what they want, ski how you want, make whoever you want your role model its your choice
-i love to ski, so should you, its fun, try it sometime
-thats what the internet is for anonymously slandering people-jason lee
Oct 18 2004 1:18PM
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manus
Posts: 1427 - Karma: 10
does no one know the powdered milk in the bed sheets trick? It works better when its warmer, but basically the body sweats while sleeping, which disolves the powdered milk, and it then gets into the pores. And yes this does stink rather badly, and does not wash off easily. There is truth to the Mallrat's line 'a small price to pay for the smiting of ones enemy'.

However, honestly, you might just be best off putting up with it. Obviously don't let him walk all over you, and don't put up with his shit, but be quick to hand it back. Another thing to keep in mind if he's using/abusing your stuff, see if you can get a lock-box or a lock and figure out how to lock it up (like in a bureau or something). That way if he breaks into it, you have him for destruction of your property, chances are that doesn't fly.


life is too short to have any regrets
Oct 18 2004 1:32PM
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Doghouse
Posts: 1473 - Karma: 21
Trick the bitch into fighting with you, if he throws the first punch its his ass. Oh yeah just call him a bitch whenever you can, it'll probably push him over the edge, ask him about all the girls he hasnt gotten with this year. And advice for you man, stand up for yourself dude. obviously if he's gonna fuck with you, give it right back 2fold mang.













'Dont sweat the petty stuff
Dont pet the sweaty stuff.'
Oct 18 2004 2:22PM
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CTD
Posts: 6300 - Karma: 348
emty his expensive colone, and piss in the bottle. make sure to drink a ton of water so its not all yellow and shit. that way, he'll go to shower himself in 100 dollar cologne, and you will basiclly be pissing all over him.





I still just have no idea how you can mistake your dick and a chicken neck, let alone not realize what you are doing. -manus

I.L.I.A.G.A CREW!


I drink pepto bismal like its water.. -PJO
Oct 18 2004 3:30PM
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Trash
Posts: 682 - Karma: 10
How about being nice to the point of being annoying? Take out his trash. Vaccum the room repeatedly. Ask him if there is anything you can do for him, and if he wants to talk about his problems. Along with that you just need another small harmless thing to send him over the edge. Rhyme all of your sentences. The goal is to make him hit you.
_
Oct 18 2004 4:48PM
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Jooky
Posts: 1239 - Karma: 37
Get a batch out in his pillow case.
__________________



'it isn't really even that bad, the whole sticking something in your ass. you cant really feel it.' - Alpentalik
Oct 18 2004 5:12PM
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girl_jibBer
Posts: 761 - Karma: 14
plant some drug shit around his stuff, then complain that all he does is smoke weed in the room...should get him kicked out
The troll stole my Santa!
Oct 18 2004 5:36PM
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flippintricker
Posts: 2408 - Karma: 9
have noisy sex



To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
Oct 18 2004 5:40PM
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flippintricker
Posts: 2408 - Karma: 9
rub it in his face



To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
Oct 18 2004 5:41PM
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flippintricker
Posts: 2408 - Karma: 9
the fact that you can get a girl, or the used condom



To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
Oct 18 2004 5:42PM
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flippintricker
Posts: 2408 - Karma: 9
teabag, or the 'true' wet willy



To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
Oct 18 2004 5:46PM
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CTripper
Posts: 6520 - Karma: 20
shit in every drawer of his dresser.
-chris
Oct 18 2004 6:22PM
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aggro_sk8
Posts: 2760 - Karma: 18
im just gonna work on handing shit back to him, although i have to say you guys are horrible. im glad youre not my room mates
-Joe
______________________________________
'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if there wasn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

Solider in the NS ARMY
Rollers of NS unite!!!
603 for life
I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21
Oct 18 2004 9:29PM
0 0
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Cohete-Rojo!
Posts: 91 - Karma: 10
I say poop in his bed. . . that'll teach him.

I went to a small christian college too, and my sophomore year, my roomate was a moron. He was one of those guys that was obsessed with counterstrike. Now I'm not saying its a bad game or anything, but this dude had a problem. He'd stay up all night playing it. Now granted he wore his headphones which I commended him for. . but he'd play with his microphone, and start yelling at his teamates at 3 am. and when he'd die he'd throw stuff and slam his hands down on the desk. That would really piss me off while I was trying to sleep. so I pooped in his bed. we're not really friends anymore.
Oct 18 2004 9:37PM
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Cohete-Rojo!
Posts: 91 - Karma: 10
another idea, that was actually done at my college. (the guys who did it got in trouble) . . make him some brownies.. . .but lace the brownies with viagra and laxatives. the results are pretty cool.
Oct 18 2004 9:47PM
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schlonginator
Posts: 3971 - Karma: 27
Pretend your his friend, get him drunk and then throw him out of your room, pile all his shit in a heap on the front lawn and set fire to it. Give him some marshmallows and tell him to toast them while watching his shit burn




___________________________
''Shake it like a polaroid picture''
Oct 18 2004 11:51PM
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@k
Posts: 572 - Karma: 10
shit on his bed






hippie stezzzze
Oct 19 2004 12:26AM
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IrishDrink87
Posts: 1568 - Karma: 17
haha, i just sent him 20 more.
5 about viagra
5 about SUPERviagra
5 entitled 'get a larger member'
and 5 from some guy called Alfredo Jack



'if the president is anything like you, atlantaski, i hope someone smacks him with a golf club and shits in his mouth.' CrystalNeedsSomething...

BUM LOVING FOR LIFE!

'If i was a slutty white chick id rather have a 14 inch beast in my twat than a 6 inch white man cock' -Lateralis
Oct 19 2004 12:49AM
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PhattTim
Posts: 13943 - Karma: 83
What you really wanna do is to take shit onto something like a piece of cardboard and then pick it up and put into the freezer. Give it a day or two to get fully solid and all good and froze. Then grab a cheesegrater, retrieve the shit and grate it all over his floor and into all his drawers and stuff. As it thaws our, it smells really bad, good times!

~~Phunkin Phatt Phreerider~~
#Cut the Jibba Jabba Crazy Fools! Start Skiing!#
*Be greatful, everyday, for snow, mountains, gravity and skiing*
@Talent Is Important, But Image Is God!@
%Jesus Is My Homeboy%
Oct 19 2004 1:35AM
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thejackamo
Posts: 1785 - Karma: 11
^yeah, but this requires you to

1. touch your own shit (unless you're wearing gloves or something)
2. waste a perfectly good cheese grater
3. you still have to live in the place if the guy moves out, so the whole place'll smell like your ass.


_____________________
'yeah line stuff blows, i got a pair of the new pollards and once i took the wrapper off the spontaneously combusted' - schlonginator
Oct 19 2004 1:38AM
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@k
Posts: 572 - Karma: 10
hey small price to pay^






hippie stezzzze
Oct 19 2004 2:27AM
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Tiffy
Posts: 872 - Karma: 10
Just be an asshole to him. Guys are assholes to chicks and they seem to get what they want, should work on your flaming friend too.
Oh snap Whistler rocked my socks.
Oct 19 2004 3:21AM
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