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Danger Wanking

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Tucker*
Posts: 184 - Karma: 109
Yep.. So Ns what is the most dangerous place you have ever wanked?

I think this thread could be funny if it goes in the right direction but please keep it to real stories

mine: The most dangerous place i have ever wanked was on a night when my sister (dance team captain) had a dance team sleep over (not related to wanking) and danger wanked 10 feet away in the computer room that has no door.

friend: Had sex in a Walmart parking lot with his girlfriend in his van

(these can also be with a girl/guy rather than yourself)

okay go!
Nov 29 2010 12:04AM
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.frenchy
Posts: 18221 - Karma: 12,323
These stories are the funniest. Y'all got balls for doing some of that shit
May 19 2011 6:42PM
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zues
Posts: 6434 - Karma: -5,330
how do you pull that off in a packed elevator?
May 19 2011 6:47PM
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tripnip
Posts: 1882 - Karma: 482
I girl gave me a handy while on the back of a horse
May 19 2011 7:15PM
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dingusboy
Posts: 32 - Karma: 10
school roof..... bleacher, neighbors tramp, school bathroom while people where walking in. in the bushes of a random house, friend went to go grab something from his car..stolen laptop nuff said

i thought this was a game only i played
May 19 2011 7:36PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
Well it was a big wedding party + bar crew all heading back to the hotel so everybody's hammered and gets in the elevator, I'm up against the wall and my date backed up to me, and her ass touched the 3/4 hardon I was rocking waistband-retainer style from our makeout a minute earlier. She didn't even look she just reached sort of behind her, starts rubbing it with her hand under my shirt, jams it down el pantalons and does a texas tuck sort of shakeweight tug dealio for the minute or two it took for someone to press the button and the elevator to get to the floor. Pretty much just enough to get me going and then leave me hanging... er... not. She gave me the best look ever getting out tho, like "lol in your face boner bitch hahahaha have fun with that" It wasn't like I whipped out a folding chair and we went to town theater style tho hahahaha

I guess somebody may have seen it, I really could give two shits I've got nothing to hide unless there's a cop nearby and there were several people making out in the elevator so that + alcohol = it doesn't matter imo.


May 19 2011 7:40PM
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PopsicleStand
Posts: 6890 - Karma: 147
Click for larger image
May 19 2011 7:54PM
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TOUCHE
Posts: 1183 - Karma: 162
We had been drinking heavily at a mate's 21st/housewarming (not too sure which), we chewed our way through a bottle of jager each and proceeded to crash at my place. In the morning (my birthday) he prematurely woke me up to notify me that he had munted in the bin right next to my bed, now i was awake i went to take a piss to find the bathroom floor to be already covered in it. i went back to the room, at which point he added that he had also jacked off in the shower. and sadly they were the only presents i recieved apart from a shoutout from a band we saw that night.
May 19 2011 8:17PM
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shocker611
Posts: 2599 - Karma: 423
i remember back in hs i fingered a girl in my friends full pool. We just acted like we were playing the "what ____ am i thinking of" dunk game.. pretty classic
May 19 2011 10:03PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
i just got a bj in a field and we almost got caught by someone walking their dog so we stealth dove behind some bushes. good thing it was dark out. /brool story
May 19 2011 10:19PM
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DaysToCome
Posts: 1601 - Karma: 86
i got a hj on a chairlift. good day of skiing that was
May 19 2011 10:29PM
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AHSkier
Posts: 563 - Karma: 42
Mock trails(in the courtroom for those of you that don't know)
May 19 2011 10:34PM
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Sleet
Posts: 327 - Karma: 13
School bathroom
May 19 2011 10:36PM
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*simba*
Posts: 9125 - Karma: 512
When I find out who my roomates at camp are, I'm going to immediately check if they posted in this thread.
May 19 2011 10:37PM
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wait.what
Posts: 1694 - Karma: 529
Did you know that if you start masturbating too early your penis stops growing? I'm sorry in advance for your 4 inch :(
May 19 2011 10:51PM
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RalphLauren.
Posts: 710 - Karma: 106
baked and drunk and wanked on a playground swing at a park
May 20 2011 12:41AM
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Utard
Posts: 2132 - Karma: 305
I just laughed for 3 minutes straight no bullshit
May 22 2011 12:44PM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,791
on a plane in the bathroom while flying to nova scotia. i got it on the door (oops) and the next person to use the bathroom was this old lady. she came out of the bathroom complaining about a "foul Smell" in the bathroom. the most fucked up part is that this actually happened.
May 22 2011 1:20PM
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bdonn
Posts: 725 - Karma: 89
Fuckin boss status
May 22 2011 1:25PM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
hahahaha what a picture
May 22 2011 1:30PM
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arneson
Posts: 427 - Karma: 144
\airplane bathroom
May 22 2011 2:43PM
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Panda_with_Guns
Posts: 3040 - Karma: 1,620
in a urinal at a reststop in iowa when i was in eighth grade. fastest wank ever. and here were no seperators between the urinals
May 22 2011 3:34PM
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Christian[MN]
Posts: 759 - Karma: 363
One time i was at this fellow NS members house and he made me leave his room and go downstairs so he could beat one off.
May 22 2011 3:37PM
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Panda_with_Guns
Posts: 3040 - Karma: 1,620
also i was in the bathroom and my sister walked in, i had porn up and everything, it was awkward. also in a hotel in a bed right next to my mom and dads bed when they were awake and im pretty sure the bed was making noise.
May 22 2011 3:48PM
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katalina
Posts: 794 - Karma: 16
people are just horny all the time it seems like.
when i was younger i did it in the back back seat of our suburban on long family drives.

i have a friend who used to do it driving to soccer tournaments and she would literally be in the same row as our teammates, she didn't give a fuck
May 22 2011 3:53PM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,791
id do that without hesitation
May 22 2011 3:57PM
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mistahfabbydavis
Posts: 216 - Karma: 15
hahaahahahahha,
greatest thread ever.

May 22 2011 6:06PM
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Get.Kronk
Posts: 2543 - Karma: 226
So my computer is in the back left corner of my room, and my door is in the front right corner. just down the hall, if you turn left out my door is a family computer desk thing. I have twice danger wanked with that door open and my mom at that computer. Also, got a random ass woody halfway up the grand canyon, and finished just as a bunch of mule tour people turned the corner.
May 22 2011 6:23PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
there was probably a gloryhole in the bathroom somewhere if it was a rest stop in iowa so you could've gotten some real action...from a 60 year old trucker
May 22 2011 6:29PM
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PacificRimJob
Posts: 24725 - Karma: 29,944
Damn.. I was probably 16 or something? It was high school, and I was in chemistry class and my ex started sending me n00dz and raunchy txts all at random... We were doing an experiment using vegetable oil or something, so I took a little plastic container thing from the equipment closet, put some of that shit in there, and went to the bathroom... for about 20 minutes... lol.
May 22 2011 6:36PM
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PopsicleStand
Posts: 6890 - Karma: 147
lulz
May 22 2011 6:57PM
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AOTEAROA
Posts: 2216 - Karma: 15
danger wanked on the drive home lastnight.
May 22 2011 8:23PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,272
danger sexed out in the open
May 22 2011 9:53PM
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TOUCHE
Posts: 1183 - Karma: 162
suprisingly i didn't find it too amusing.
May 22 2011 11:54PM
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n_b
Posts: 580 - Karma: 68
hahha
May 23 2011 12:02AM
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TheDude
Posts: 2058 - Karma: 117

a bunch of friends and family were sitting watching a movie and i had my girlfiend on my lap with my dad like 3 feet away. you know my hand was down her pants for 20 minutes. then 2 hours later we got caught secksing upstairs but i still finished like a boss,  sshit you not.

also i heard the car pull into the garage today right as i started, knew i had MAYBE 5 minutes while my mom checked email in the car before she came in. i came before she did, #winning.

Jun 8 2011 12:03AM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
In a beach house with a bunch of my friends outside my bedroom.
Jun 8 2011 12:14AM
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DERS.
Posts: 6299 - Karma: 1,293
beach week? south bethany?... next week for me though..
Jun 8 2011 12:18AM
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mattytru
Posts: 2788 - Karma: 5,618
only sotra badass ones i have are the classic "fucked her in the basement while a family party is in progress upstairs" and sex in a school bathroom
Jun 8 2011 12:29AM
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golfwangkta
Posts: 16 - Karma: 9
i tried beating off in jail with a camera on me and got a criminal mischief charge
Jun 8 2011 1:01AM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
Yes! Wait don't tell anybody that story sometimes I forget youre on NS hahaha. I'm leaving on Saturday when are you coming?
Jun 8 2011 3:09AM
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DERS.
Posts: 6299 - Karma: 1,293
lolz. ima tell all my frienz back at chs... aka you.

i come on... Sunday... typical. we should hang in pmac sometime after that though... pretty sure ur like 30 secks from meh... toss some javelins @ avenal park one night or somethin.
Jun 8 2011 3:17AM
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bgould
Posts: 1306 - Karma: 23
i pig roasted a girl on the side of someones house during a car rally. we had to stop because her knees were bleeding haha
Jun 8 2011 3:45AM
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Jahseph.
Posts: 1315 - Karma: 267
I'm not much for the danger wank, I prefer the dangerous hook-ups personally.

Most dangerous one was in a hotel room while her dad was in the other bed five feet away.

My brother however is a sick fuck, and I've heard a story from him about a lonely chair ride...
Jun 8 2011 4:12AM
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FBGM
Posts: 8184 - Karma: 2,677
fuck yeah
Jun 8 2011 4:58AM
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Blindsurfer
Posts: 2252 - Karma: 2,791
bump
Dec 1 2011 7:19PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51642 - Karma: 162,229
GTFO
Dec 1 2011 7:20PM
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KravtZ
Posts: 6637 - Karma: 2,629
that is so awsome...never really thought about that. If its early or late in teh day when you got a few chairs ahead or behind you fuck it why not probably feels amazing getting off the lift and shredding a run after you wank it out
Dec 1 2011 7:23PM
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KANGAROOJACK
Posts: 361 - Karma: 59
here's a competitor for number 1, in a 3 row car, my dad and a ski coach in the front, in the middle my sister and her friend, and in the last row, me, jerkin it, held a pillow up with my knees and did my buisness, took a solid 45 minutes to get up to "peak point" because i had to go super slow. /claim
Dec 1 2011 7:30PM
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penguin_steeze
Posts: 2311 - Karma: 241
alright so I'm a little tentative about telling this one but screw it... A couple of years ago, I had this incredibly hot teacher named mrs. hartman. She had a pretty damn hot body too for a 30 year old. I ended up getting a detention for talking all class or some shit like that so she made me come after school to serve my detention in her room. I'm pretty proud of myself since she's hot as fuck but I was also pretty pissed. I go to her room at 4 o clock which is an hour after school was let out.. And I was alone with her. She ended up going to a teacher meeting in the classroom next to me. I was in the mood to wank it, alone, bored, and had nothing to do. She left the door open and said she would come back to check on me. So she leaves and I wait 15 minutes until I just can't take it anymore. I walk over to the teachers desk, drop my pants and whip it out. Like halfway through I hear the door open down the hall and I was about to shit my pants. I legitimately thought I was going to die. I pull up my pants and sprint back to where i was sitting right as she walks in. She doesn't really notice but she goes to get something off her desk right where I was, talks to me for like a minute and leaves. I go back to my business and I was wondering what would happen when I bust. There was no tissues so since I was pissed at her... her extra pair of socks and shoes were sitting next to her chair. I was pretty pissed at her for giving me a detention so I decided to bust in her sock. So I grab the sock and yeah... then sit in my seat like nothing happened. She comes back and I leave. Next day, she was saying how someone spilled something sticky on her socks. Funniest moment in my life.

Sparknotes: Hot teacher gives me detention
Leaves room
Jerk it
Bust a load into her sock
win
Dec 1 2011 7:37PM
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PopsicleStand
Posts: 6890 - Karma: 147
do you follow the teacher sex scandal ratings on barstool?

cause this has all the makings...she was definitely a milfy minx
Dec 1 2011 7:39PM
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