Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post.
Register to become a member today!
the absolute dumbest jokes you've ever heard
Posts: 8762
-
Karma: 12
this was said to me by a retard(no seriously)
'where do gay people shop? Fags are us'
Mind can make a heaven from hell, and a hell from heaven
Posts: 4120
-
Karma: 41
why do cows crap in the grass ?
BECAUSEI FUCKED YOUR MOTHER
dumbest thing ive ever heard
************************************************************
-Matt
my one friend was pushed into a pole and he riped his sack open on impact now we call him stitchie
What our sport needs is love, not everyone trying to be cooler than each other.-skimack
Posts: 7854
-
Karma: 89
crytal needs a park, i remember that from love line it was facking disgusting.
i was going to go for a quad daffy but i was like, why huck? -mommy
Posts: 586
-
Karma: 6
Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was BLAHHARHHGAHHAA
Posts: 973
-
Karma: 19
Q: so why did the woman cross the road?
A: who the hell cares, what is she doing out of the kitchen
Q: why do women have boobs?
A: so you got something to look at when they are talking to you
i actually like these jokes,just thought id share them
Believing in jesus is like believing in santa claus, once you reach a certain age you realize that it's all made up
Posts: 586
-
Karma: 6
A man runs over a woman with a motorcyle... who's fault is it?
The man's... he shouldn't have been riding the motorcycle in the kitchen.
Posts: 28699
-
Karma: -5,563
why are womens feet soo small?
so they can stand closer to the sink.
'The only way you can ruin the present is by worrying about the future'
Posts: 3054
-
Karma: 24
what do you use to drive through fog?
a car
why does a chicken coupe only have 2 doors
cus if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken sedan
____________________
HIGH NORTH SESSION 2 BITCH
Posts: 7906
-
Karma: 33
Q: when is a car not a car?
A: when it turns into a drive way
-Thom Savery
please pardon the cacography
--->CCR*
'Oooohhhhhhhh, 'straight edge', that sounds so hardcore, I guess it's just better than saying 'I'm a sanctimonious pussy who thinks he's better than everyone else.'' -Gdawg3
Posts: 249
-
Karma: 11
why dont women wear watches?
beacuse theres a clock on the stove
Posts: 385
-
Karma: 10
why did the chicken cross the road?...
because i kicked it
he is too new to know about the old school newschoolers.
- linemaverick540
Posts: 1089
-
Karma: 10
1 black joke)
why are black people so tall?....becuase their knee grows (negros)
1 physics joke)
why did the chicken cross teh road?.... y not (physics term for initial y postion)
the last one
how do you make martha stewert cry twice? fuck her in the ass then wipe your dick on the drapes
$$ ICED OUT RACING $$
toss your salad outta here
Posts: 385
-
Karma: 10
i like the martha one
he is too new to know about the old school newschoolers.
- linemaverick540
je suis un pizza(I am a pizza)
avec du fromage(with cheese)
je mange le petit chevre(I eat little goats)
avec le pepperoni(with pepperoni)
Posts: 3710
-
Karma: 23
wat is purple adn hanging off my porch
barnie hanging
'weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee go nads' the squirle
Posts: 12020
-
Karma: 9,475
why do black peopel have white hands... caue they were on a wall when god shit on the...
what does it mean when the flag is half mast at teh post office... ther hiring...
---------------------
'Iam sittin here in my Ns hoodie, i have my goggles on and my silk pj's.. God!! i want to ski.. Shorty -T
Posts: 7121
-
Karma: 15
why couldnt Hellen Keller drive?
Cuase she was a women.
Posts: 7121
-
Karma: 15
What do you call a Korean walking a dog?
A vegitarian.
Posts: 12020
-
Karma: 9,475
^^^^ HOLY FUCKK> BHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
---------------------
'Iam sittin here in my Ns hoodie, i have my goggles on and my silk pj's.. God!! i want to ski.. Shorty -T
Posts: 3255
-
Karma: 11
My friend's dad was really drunk so they had to pick him up from a party and when they we're pullin out of the driveway he grabbed that bar in the car and started yeling 'WHY ARE YOU GOING SO FAST?' then when they were's almost home he sundelly grabed the wheel and said 'WAIT! I forgot the duck' and they almost died
This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass
Posts: 2431
-
Karma: 14
list of awful/somewhat funny jokes
Q Why couldn't helen keller drive?
A CAUSE SHE WAS A WOMAN
Q What do you call nuts on a wall?
Wall nuts
What do you call nuts on a chest?
chest nuts
What do you call nuts on a chin?
DICK IN THE MOUTH
Q Whats red and bubbly and taps on your window?
a baby in the microwave
Q whats black and blue and squirms when you touch it?
A baby in a garbage back
Q Whats green and black and smells like shit?
Same baby, two weeks later
Q Why do mexicans make enchiladas?
so their kids will have something to unrap on christmas
Q What do you call a mexican getting into a porsche?
GRAND THEFT AUTO
Q What do micheal jackson and mcdonalds have in common?
they both like to stick their meat in 12 year old buns
Q Why dont i trust woman?
because i dont trust anything that can bleed for 3 days and not die
So this family ate dinner together, 2 daughters, a mom and a dad, they ate a turkey that their dad had shot himself. after dinner the girls come up to their mom at different times and tell her that they pissed out B.B.s, the mom says thats just because their dad shot the turkey with a bb gun. then the son comes up and before he can say anything his mom says 'lemme guess, you pissed out a bb?' to which he replys, 'no mom, i was jacking off on the porch and shot the dog.'
Q What happens when you kick a rednecks cousin in the mouth?
the redneck gets a circumsicion.
if i think up anymore ill post them
______________________________________
'michael moore called...said he is ready to fuck you again' - SUpilot
'Yeah, most pros are strict Mormons. I read an interview with Tanner where he talked about his experience with a caffinated beverage. He said that it screwed up his style because he was poisoning the temple that is his body. Then some of his wives left him.' - Mistaskier
Posts: 1370
-
Karma: 67
^ i dont like the baby jokes but the michael jackson one is hilarious
Posts: 727
-
Karma: 20
Q: why does michael jackson like 28 year olds??
A: because there are 20 of them
Q: why was tigger looking in the toilet?
A; he was looking for pooh
_____________________________
this is the life God chose for me...
c-crew like what
Posts: 903
-
Karma: 11
what do you call a guy with no limbs thats stuck in a mail box?
BILL
what do you call a guy with no limbs, tahts in a pool?
BOB
*******************************************************
a good friend will always bail you out of jail, a best friend will be sitting there next to you saying that was fucking awsome
time flies like the wind, fruit flies like bananas
Posts: 1087
-
Karma: 10
a totally naked man walks into a psychiatrists office wearing nothing but saran wrap. The psychiatrist immediatly declares, 'Well, I can clearly see your nuts.'
___________________
'I swear she looked 17!' -My almost 22 year old friend talking about his 14 year old cousin
member# 1981
Posts: 6440
-
Karma: 41
this joke is so stupid and i got it from this goofy kid at my school.
when the pope was a kid, and he went on his roof, what did he drop on people's heads?
HOLY WATER BALLOONS! *laugh hysterically for 10 minutes, bow and walk off*
~*Michelle
->'the CD goes right here. the speakers... oh well one of 'em's broken, but THIS speaker is good, and these wires, they are really good!'
Posts: 1568
-
Karma: 11
a guy walked into a bar and said to the bartender 'I bet you a beer that I can bite my eyeball' The bartender looksat theguy and said 'ok, no one can bite their own eyeball' so the guy took out his glass eye, bit it, then stuck it back in. Thebartender, laughing, says 'touche' and gived the guy his beer. After the guy had finished his drink, he says to the bartender, 'I bet you another beer that I can bite my other eyeball.' the bartender replies 'ok noone can have 2 glass eyes.' so the guy pops out his false teeth and bites his eye... he got his 2nd beer....
Not afraid to be mistaken not afraid to try, not afraid to be uncertain not afraid to die
Posts: 1568
-
Karma: 11
what did the ocean say to the plane as it flew over
nothing, it just waved
Not afraid to be mistaken not afraid to try, not afraid to be uncertain not afraid to die
Posts: 1568
-
Karma: 11
what do you get when you cross a teacher and a crab?
snappy answers
Not afraid to be mistaken not afraid to try, not afraid to be uncertain not afraid to die
Posts: 1568
-
Karma: 11
where do fish keep their money?
in a riverbank
Not afraid to be mistaken not afraid to try, not afraid to be uncertain not afraid to die
Posts: 1568
-
Karma: 11
2 guys were walking down the street and one turned into a store...
Not afraid to be mistaken not afraid to try, not afraid to be uncertain not afraid to die
Posts: 12020
-
Karma: 9,475
what do you call a girl with no panties in teh winter time... chapped lips...
whats blue and hangs from a tree.. a monkeys after birth
why did the monky fall out of the tree.. casue it was dead..
why did they baby fall out of teh tree.. it was stapled to teh monkey..
whats red and sits in the corner.. baby playing with razors.
whats green and sits in teh corner.. same baby 3 months later..
there jsut starting
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
just chillax and slide.. Shorty _t
Posts: 1568
-
Karma: 11
this is fun but it's also a sign that we have way too much free time when skiing's not around to entertain us.......
Not afraid to be mistaken not afraid to try, not afraid to be uncertain not afraid to die
All times are Eastern (-5)
