Replying to Vancouver Theory-3/Poorboyz premiere (reminder)

Unacceptable reasons for not coming to the Vancouver Theory-3/Poorboyz premiere of Safety Meeting & WAR this Friday night @ 6pm at UBC in the main ballroom of the Student Union Building, followed by a turbo-rad afterparty right downstairs at the Pit (since the beer gardens were cancelled). Compiled by Jeff Schmuck & Dan Hedekar while putting off making signs for ski poles and looking for missing binding screws at Comor.

-I have to work/I cant get work off.
-I live in Whistler/Vernon/Penticton/USA.
-I live too far away.
-I have no way of getting there.
-My car is broken/might break down.
-I’m getting surgery.
-I’m sick.
-I’m tired.
-I’m broke.
-I’m a bitch.
-Nobody likes me.
-I’m not allowed to pull fire alarms.
-My syphillis flared up again.
-There’s going to be way too many people in the theatre for me to jerk off without getting caught.
-I’m in jail.
-I don’t drink.
-I drink, but I don’t want to be hungover for the snow show.
-Zach Davison gave me STD’s and I don’t want to face him.
-Justin Dorey got me pregnant and I don’t want to face him.
-Matt Margetts is just too damn sexy and I don’t want to face him.
-Nicole Pendleberry broke my heart by going out with Jeffy and I don’t want to face her.
-I’m gay, and Jeff Thomas isn’t, which really really sucks cuz I want to be with him but I cant…so I don’t want to face him.
-I’m in a ski/snowboard club.
-I have homework.
-I hate Simon/I hate Josh (haha, sorry boys, had to do it).
-It’s my girlfriend’s best friend’s birthday.
-My girlfriend/boyfriend doesn’t want to go.
-My ex-girlfriend/ex-boyfriend is going to be there.
-My wife/girlfriend is giving birth.
-I actually don’t watch ski movies to enjoy them. I watch them strictly to over analyze everything that’s wrong with the video, the riders and the film company itself, and then log onto this website as soon as it’s over and bitch about it.
-I don’t ski.
-I’m a snowboarder.
-worse yet, I’m a ski racer.
-I’ve already seen Safety Meeting and/or War 10,000,000,000 times.
-I have a different premiere to go to.
-I got abducted by aliens.
-I’ve got a date with a hot transvestite.
-I’m more of an MSP fan actually.
-I don’t want to hook up with a hot, easy, first year UBC girl.
-I don’t want to watch two rad ski movies, get drunk and have a good time with friends and win free stuff.
-I’m scared of Jeff Schmuck and/or Dan Hedekar.


see everyone there.